Charlotte's scratch post

[Devlyn ✅]

I do sometimes wonder if my transition is just an ADHD obsession and dopamine source. But then theres no way I could go through with the things I am if I wasn't at least gender flexible. I'm guessing most people would get distressed at the idea of being the opposite gender? I think some days I'm male in my head, but still love having a more feminine body. In any case it still feels good so I'll just run with it!

Me in a nutshell. 🙂

Hugs, Devlyn

[Lori Dee ✅]

I think a lot of us starting out have those questions, searching for the "why".

Eventually, we reach a point where why matters less than how or what.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

I think a lot of us starting out have those questions, searching for the "why".

Eventually, we reach a point where why matters less than how or what.

I just wonder sometimes with not having that strong childhood dysphoria many have. But it feels right and I just go with my gut. I'm kinda happy I got to live as a man and now get to live my final years as a woman. Unlike many I don't hate and regret my life as a man. But it's just not for me now...I feel different. Not sure I'd go back and change anything.  The only single thing I sincerely wish I could change in my life is my psychological state. Everything else happened as it did and I'm perfectly at peace with it all.

[Lori Dee ✅]

My dysphoria was not Gender Dysphoria when I was younger. It was more like Body Dysmorphia. I had no concept of gender and assumed it was tied to sexual orientation. It wasn't until I got into therapy that I learned the differences and could then look back and say, "Oh, yeah. That was me."

 Now, my attitude is No Regrets, No Excuses, Make it Happen.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

I'm now on day 7 since my 5mg injection of estradiol valerate. Would i feel it of my levels had dropped low? I feel just like everyday really. Getting tested next Saturday as wanted two doses in first.

[Devlyn ✅]

There are days I forget to take my HRT. I don't feel any different. When my wife and I travel we frequently just leave the HRT at home intentionally.

I've been off HRT a couple times, once for surgery. After about a week I started feeling the difference.

YMMV.

Hugs, Devlyn

[tammy753]

There are days I forget to take my HRT. I don't feel any different. When my wife and I travel we frequently just leave the HRT at home intentionally.

I've been off HRT a couple times, once for surgery. After about a week I started feeling the difference.

YMMV.

Hugs, Devlyn

I forget sometimes and used to think there was some hidden meaning like maybe I didn't want to transition enough. I have realized I am just crazy forgetful. I now use an app to tell me when to take everything. I will mess up but it helps. Some old person keeps turning the volume down on the phone, GRRRRR!

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

In the weeks since starting progesterone my boobs have technically increased from B to C cup - 38 band 41 breats. They are still at least two sizes too small for my liking. Again they are very easily hidden by fits not carefully chosen to show them so i still need enhancers in daily. In my swimsuit i look flat chested with C cup, and don't kvow why. They do seem to squash down very easily so think thats part of it. They are not very solid, quite floppy. Considering this I'm looking to get minimum DD but really want E cups!

[Devlyn ✅]

I forget sometimes and used to think there was some hidden meaning like maybe I didn't want to transition enough. I have realized I am just crazy forgetful. I now use an app to tell me when to take everything. I will mess up but it helps. Some old person keeps turning the volume down on the phone, GRRRRR!

I thought I was doing great until I got all clever and bought one of those grandma pill cases. That's when I discovered exactly how often I was skipping them. 🤣

"Hmmm, it's Tuesday...why are Mondays pills still in here?"

[Maid Marion]

I thought I was doing great until I got all clever and bought one of those grandma pill cases. That's when I discovered exactly how often I was skipping them. 🤣

"Hmmm, it's Tuesday...why are Mondays pills still in here?"

Yes, I use one of those as well!

Marion

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

Heyya @Petunia

Not seen you for a bit. Hope you're doing ok sweetie?

Charlotte ❤️

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

I'm definitely getting more confident in my femininity despite the occasional dips. I wore a baseball cap which I was scared to before incase it affected my passing. Its so nice to feel the freedom to express myself, yet still feel like a woman.

I loved my other Cath Kidston swimsuit so much that I bought the other pattern one on the sale. I love these beautifully feminine suits.

For the furry meet I was out showing a lot of skin! No one batted an eyelid. Complete freedom wherever I go. I'm loving being a woman. It's feeling amazing.  I will grow, I will get better.  It'll not be plain sailing, but will inch closer each week. I'm still fighting even though it might not always look that way.

[Lori Dee ✅]

I LOVE THAT HAT!

❤️

[Laura Squirrel]

That head looks amazing! Wow. How much was that thing?

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

That head looks amazing! Wow. How much was that thing?

I adopted my bunny Skittles from a furry in the US. Was about $300 with a cute nub tail too. My first fursuit! Called a partial suit as no bodysuit or feetpaws.

Also by showing so much skin I'm doing something called poodling in the furry world. Antrocon in the US had controversy as they banned poodlers in the fursuit parade! Oh well

[Petunia]

Heyya @Petunia

Not seen you for a bit. Hope you're doing ok sweetie?

Charlotte ❤️

Thank you Charlotte.

I think this post sums up how nice you are.

You are having your own issues and yet you are thinking of me.  Thankyou.

I had a bit of a drama queen meltdown a bit over a week ago.

My wife all of a sudden told me she had been visiting Susans and wanted to know what my name is.

This was always going happen at some stage but I wanted to be there when she started reading.

When we sat down to start, she didn't want too look at it.

She admitted that she has outed me to a close friend.
I think she told her friend P wants to transition.
Her friend asked, what do you want.
My wifes reply was for us to be together.

I have been spending a lot of time revisiting "are you trans?" sites trying to convince myself over and over that I'm not.

My internal self focussed transphobia is trying to find another way around this.
I don't hate trans people it's just I'm having a hard time believing I could be transgender.

I know I'm kidding myself. But I can't explain how conflicted I am.

Tomorrow I am seeing a gender affirming doctor.

[Stottie Girl]

Thank you Charlotte.

I think this post sums up how nice you are.

You are having your own issues and yet you are thinking of me.  Thankyou.

I had a bit of a drama queen meltdown a bit over a week ago.

My wife all of a sudden told me she had been visiting Susans and wanted to know what my name is.

This was always going happen at some stage but I wanted to be there when she started reading.

When we sat down to start, she didn't want too look at it.

She admitted that she has outed me to a close friend.
I think she told her friend P wants to transition.
Her friend asked, what do you want.
My wifes reply was for us to be together.

I have been spending a lot of time revisiting "are you trans?" sites trying to convince myself over and over that I'm not.

My internal self focussed transphobia is trying to find another way around this.
I don't hate trans people it's just I'm having a hard time believing I could be transgender.

I know I'm kidding myself. But I can't explain how conflicted I am.

Tomorrow I am seeing a gender affirming doctor.

Sorry to hear that Petunia, that sounds heavy to deal with. Your wife is probably in shock. The key takeaway from what you said is that she wants you two to be together. That's a great starting point for discussion.

I can't say whether or not you are transsexual but from what you post you are clearly transgender to me. Your gender afirming doctor should be able to help you figure out where you are on the spectrum.

Keep us posted if you can Petunia, I'm sure we are all interested in your journey and we are all wishing you and your wife the best through this difficult part of your lives. If your wife wants to know about this stuff and she feels able, I would urge her to look at the significant others section of Susans, she might find some incredibly useful advice there and maybe a voice or two of support from existing members.

Sarah xx

[Finally Anna]

We are hogging Charlotte's blog a bit, but perhaps that is ok?

These things stir up ones mind a lot and it can be quite painful. We all here know that very well. I know it too, even if I am not (yet) at the transition bridge. But I think there's light at the end of the tunnel, in what P writes. 💕

She admitted that she has outed me to a close friend. I think she told her friend P wants to transition.
Her friend asked, what do you want.
My wifes reply was for us to be together.

Right or wrong, but to me this says that she is actually beginning to accept the situation, starting to overcome her own fears. Telling someone is to let the "secret" out, even if it is to a best friend. I don't think she would do that if she thought it would kill the relation that she values very much.

She didn't say that she wants P to not transition.
She didn't say that she thinks things will go south.
She said that she wants to stay together.