I missed the beach so much during my transition. I live walking distance from a nice sandy beach, and on hot nights, many of my neighbours would sit in the shallows and chat as we watched the sun set. While standing in knee deep water my wife had an eagle ray swim up and caress her legs for a couple of seconds. Magic memories!
But then I transitioned. Though presenting as a female, I could still sit on the beach just in my male speedos, and not be detected as trans. But it gave me dysphoria. Then came some breast growth, and I just felt too awkward to go to the beach. I also stopped lap swimming at my local pool. I missed both.
A trans friend nagged me to get breast augmentation, and though it wasn's a dysphoria trigger for me, there were practical advantages, swimming being one of them. I finally had the confidence to go back to lap swimming, though not to wear a bikini, but rather a rash top and bikini bottom (post bottom surgery). I successfully navigated the women's showers and change rooms, so going to my local beach was also possible. I suspect people still see me as a trans woman, but nobody has reacted negatively, and I do love going to my beach!
Hugs,
Allie
