Anna, finally but not yet final.

[Christina152]

I use a pink-tinted clear polish. Two coats and then a matt polish to finish. The matt wears off slowly over a couple  of days leaving a very natural, well-groomed look.

[Finally Anna]

I use a pink-tinted clear polish. Two coats and then a matt polish to finish. The matt wears off slowly over a couple  of days leaving a very natural, well-groomed look.

I will try that, Christina. But using only clear glossy is also nice. I have more or less stopped caring about what other people think about it. So what if I like glossy and long-ish nails...

[Lori Dee ✅]

So what if I like glossy and long-ish nails...

Exactly.

Very very early in my transition, I was experimenting with nail polish. I had to replace my phone, and when the FedEx driver delivered it, the driver noticed my nails as I was signing for the package.

She said she liked my nails, then stopped, looked at my deadname, looked at me, and said, "Oh." I felt a little embarrassed, so I asked her if she had grandkids. She said she did. I said my granddaughter enjoys painting my nails. What grandparent of any sex would deny their granddaughter that?

After that, my attitude became "so what?" If I don't have an issue with it, why should you?

[Christina152]

I will try that, Christina. But using only clear glossy is also nice. I have more or less stopped caring about what other people think about it. So what if I like glossy and long-ish nails...

That is nice. But I daren't push my luck too far. My wife has already commented on my longer than normal nails. My toenails are  a glossy pink but that's explained by being 'antifungal treatment'

[Finally Anna]

Oh, my wife also commented, "I think you have longer nails than I have", as a kind of soft observation. But I am out to her so she knows about my transfemme identity. I don't have really long nails but perhaps they are 2(3) mm longer than the fingers and with squoval shape and there is a very obvious natural grey/white tip.

[Valerie.Val]

It is a bit like being in a kind of No man's Land. Maybe I wrote that before? Anyway, while I know that I really want to be a woman, am a woman, I am probably not fully there yet (mentally). But I am definitely not still a man and that is very obvious to me. So, for the time being it leaves me in an in-between state. Maybe that is my destination, to not fully embrace the female role and style? Or maybe it is just a temporary plateau and there is more to come? Or perhaps it is the combination of rather newly accepting a trans identity while also being very careful in not unecessarily ruining a beautiful marriage and not being all convinced about going full out with the social transition? Or a combination of all those? Or maybe being close to my real identity?

I think I replied to this before but forgot to send so here goes again. :-)

Maybe it helps you same as it helped me, to first figure out for yourself your actual truth. To do that, you could try to imagine a parallel universe where there were absolutely no negative social consequences to whatever you want to be. Who would you want be in this world?

If you can get that figured out first, you can then better distinguish between who you wish to be, and the compromises you are willing to make for the sake of your loved ones. A good base to move forward with honesty.

[Valerie.Val]

Of COURSE I'm replying to this, right? 🤣❤️

I loved reading that! <3

[Finally Anna]

try to imagine a parallel universe where there were absolutely no negative social consequences to whatever you want to be. Who would you want be in this world?

I think I have that one fairly well imagined and I'd be the "real" Anna with all that comes with it. And I'd have been the "real" Anna since forever. So, my slow, glacial, pace is about the social things, about the femme pull not being super-strong (my dysphoria is low-ish) and about me being a bit old.

[Maid Marion]

I usually wear bright pink nail polish.  😀

Think of the movie Legally Blonde.
If you can't see my nail polish you are legally blind.

I know a legally blind ham radio operator.
Amazingly enough, he builds his own equipment!

[Stottie Girl]

I think I replied to this before but forgot to send so here goes again. :-)

Maybe it helps you same as it helped me, to first figure out for yourself your actual truth. To do that, you could try to imagine a parallel universe where there were absolutely no negative social consequences to whatever you want to be. Who would you want be in this world?

If you can get that figured out first, you can then better distinguish between who you wish to be, and the compromises you are willing to make for the sake of your loved ones. A good base to move forward with honesty.

Absolutely a woman, no doubt in my mind at all. Just as well I AM a woman😉

[ChrissyRyan]

One needs to be clear about all of this, and good therapy can bring out much clarity.
While it is not possible to change your birth sex and chromosomes, except perhaps your sex as noted in documentation, you can live your life, to various degrees, as if you were born with the correct sex.  However, one should be clear as to what that means for you.

People generally seem to not fully understand why a woman would "all the sudden" would want to be a man, or vice versa.  Well, it is atypical to be an "all the sudden" situation, many of us have thought about all of this for a long time.  At least, I think so.

Crossdressers can enjoy many of the pleasantries related to expressing themselves.
Transsexuals are beyond that, they realize that they have the wrong bodies.

I wish so much I was born with the correct body and was raised as female.  Then I would have had many of those life experiences I SHOULD HAVE HAD. 

I am trying to live as the true me.  I can work and be accepted by my coworkers as me.  A woman.

In just a little bit, I will get ready for the workday.  I will have that essential makeup on, my bra and camisole on, my soft panties, my blouse and skirt, and nice shoes.  Purse and bracelet and necklace.  Pretty nails.  All of that is nice but being accepted as me is so, so important. 

Do have a wonderful day everyone.  Be grateful for what you have and try to make someone's day with a genuine compliment and kindness. 

Hugs,

Chrissy

[Finally Anna]

People generally seem to not fully understand why a woman would "all the sudden" would want to be a man, or vice versa.  Well, it is atypical to be an "all the sudden" situation, many of us have thought about all of this for a long time.  At least, I think so.

People other than trans persons cannot really understand this. They can logically understand that body and brain develop in certain ways in the womb and they can understand that there can be a mismatch, but they can't fully grasp what it means. Also a part of the equation is that being a trans person is not a black/white thing like how it is often depicted in media. While we absolutely can be binary in our amab or afab transsexuality, we are still on a wide spectrum when it comes to how and "how much" we need to transition or integrate or express.

This inability to understand all aspects is also what makes it be "all of a sudden" from their point of view. I can just look at myself as an example. In retrospect I have kind of suspected, possibly even half-known, for almost all my life. At least since I was around 13-14 yo. But I have not been very dysphoric and so I have been able to live a normal and good cis-male life up until the point when I just couldn't anymore. And this is seen as "all of a sudden" for everyone but me.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

My story seems very similar, Anna. I lived without gender worries for a very long time and it only became an issue as I started to experience what better could actually be. But then I never tied myself to male gender norms, wearing and styling myself as I wished despite being a man up to recently. Also generally relating better to women and the kind of groups and conversations they had. But then massive euphoria from actually considering the idea of transitioning; an eyes open kind of moment, then the past made sense in more than a few ways.

Being agender to at least some degree makes it even more hard for some to comprehend too. The idea that gender is personal and maybe more linked to wellbeing than anything else.

[Maid Marion]

My wife thought I was autistic.  Turns out that if I present female it is far easier for me to socialize! I can pick up and respond to nonverbal social interactions faster than I can think about it!

[ChrissyRyan]

My wife thought I was autistic.  Turns out that if I present female it is far easier for me to socialize! I can pick up and respond to nonverbal social interactions faster than I can think about it!

That sounds good Marion, about you being able to socialize more!


Chrissy

[tgirlamg]

I have more or less stopped caring about what other people think about it.

☝️👩👍