Anxiety

[Reborn@57]

Hi ...

Sorry about asking this cause I don't won't bring up any bad situation for anyone or any bad memories..

But how do you deal with the what ifs .. omg — some days are ok but some days are so horrible with indecision and questions...

I keep telling myself take it one day at a time but it's so hard at times and seem like late bites are the worst .. maybe I'm just feeling a little emotional and I need to just suck it up .. lol. 

Anyways thanks for letting me share ... ❤️

[Jessica_Rose ✅]

The vast majority of things you worry about will never happen. It's OK to think about and plan for different scenarios, that way you will be prepared. However, don't obsess or worry about everything. That will only distract you from finding your path to happiness.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

[Lori Dee ✅]

The What If game is one that no one wins. No matter what scenario you come up with, you can just flip it to its opposite.

What if I run out of money? What if you don't?
What if I get hurt? What if you don't?
What if... doesn't work? What if it does?

You can go round and round forever doing that. The only way to escape it is to refuse to play the game. As Jessica said, it is good to plan ahead. But most of what we worry about never happens.

If you worry, you will die.
If you don't worry, you will die.
So why worry?

Focus on something you enjoy doing and change your thoughts.

[KristaFairchild]

Hi ...

Sorry about asking this cause I don't won't bring up any bad situation for anyone or any bad memories..

But how do you deal with the what ifs .. omg — some days are ok but some days are so horrible with indecision and questions...

I keep telling myself take it one day at a time but it's so hard at times and seem like late bites are the worst .. maybe I'm just feeling a little emotional and I need to just suck it up .. lol. 

Anyways thanks for letting me share ... ❤️

First, this is good question and the result of whatever negative judgment you arr putting in yourself 😉

I HAD to answer the dang relentless questions. Was this real? Was I mentally ill? Was it a fetish? Where did it come from since it wasn't there when I was young? And on and on. 

Asking them and thinking was getting me nowhere except The Infinite Land of Frustration. 

I had to DO something. I worked an inner child workbook. Then a gender identity workbook. I pestered people on here. I found gender nonconforming groups with no gate keeping - anyone could attend. I got an online gender therapist. I reflected with AI support and created dozens of of documents. 

It was a lot and obsessive and ridiculous and ultimately part of what I needed to recognize the woman in the mirror. 

[Stottie Girl]

The what if's are what paralyses me, holds me back. It's the main reason I have not transitioned yet. It drives huge fear in me. I have nobody around me to lean on for support and encouragement. I have to deal with it solo which I do find very very hard.

I guess that is why my journey is all about doing as much as I possibly can to complete the transition behind the closet door. In a perfect world I would just wake up one day and walk out the door as Sarah and that would be that, no awkward phase of people laughing behind my back, pointing the finger, little children asking loud and embarrassing questions, no abuse getting shouted at me in the street, no fear of being attacked (well no more than the average CIS woman!) etc etc!

I'm probably kidding myself, this will probably happen anyway and I should just put my big girls pants on and get out there but it is easier said than done for some

[Devlyn ✅]

@Stottie Girl I see there's an issue with the software filter in your post. I'm sure you can guess what falsely triggered it. We apologize, the issue is flagged, and as soon as an administrator comes online we will correct the problem. Thanks in advance for your patience. 🙂

[tammy753]

I am the biggest doubter in the world. I rethink every decision I make. My therapist tells me I have the same rights to live my life as everyone else. I still am struggling with the programming from my childhood that I had to live to protect my families reputation. I don't have any great insights to share. Just know you aren't alone in these thoughts.

[Stottie Girl]

@Stottie Girl I see there's an issue with the software filter in your post. I'm sure you can guess what falsely triggered it. We apologize, the issue is flagged, and as soon as an administrator comes online we will correct the problem. Thanks in advance for your patience. 🙂

Did not even notice Dev. I've edited it anyway to save you all the bother.

[Maid Marion]

I had no anxiety wearing my pink bikini top, short shorts, and Hawaiian slippers while hiking an all terrain beach trail!  It was close to an access road for an easy exit should I become injured and unable to walk.  That also meant that I patiently waited for the elderly to discover they couldn't handle the trail and turned back after a few minutes.  I learned to go everywhere in slippers as a kid and quickly managed to navigate the rocks on the trail!  This skill separates those who grew up there and outsiders as it is easy to lose your balance and fall without proper footwear.

I've been focusing on improving my balance to play better golf.  Wearing slippers while hiking is another step toward improvement.

[Gina P]

I am the biggest doubter in the world. I rethink every decision I make. My therapist tells me I have the same rights to live my life as everyone else. I still am struggling with the programming from my childhood that I had to live to protect my families reputation. I don't have any great insights to share. Just know you aren't alone in these thoughts.

Tammy, Stottie girl, Reborn, I wish I could just erase the 10 or so years of childhood. The teasing and taunting, your to fat, to tall, to short, to ugly.... I think we all went through it. Scarry how those few years shape the rest of our lives. Now every interaction, I scrutinize and replay over and over. Did I handle that correct or could I have done it differently. Worry, who me? The answer is a resounding YES! Worry doesn't make life any easier but how not to, that is the question.

[Lori Dee ✅]

Did not even notice Dev. I've edited it anyway to save you all the bother.

But if it isn't correct, we need to fix it anyway.

Thanks, Sarah.

[Stottie Girl]

But if it isn't correct, we need to fix it anyway.

Thanks, Sarah.

The auto correct was never really a problem for me to be honest. I'm just keeping out of it from now on Lori. I have no wish to get into further trouble.

[Reborn@57]

Hello

I just wanted to say thanks again for allowing me to post and thanks so much for the answers and feedback back .. it's nice to know other people have the same issues and in not some big Kiddy kiddy... lol and that I'm not alone....

By the way finished two hours of electrolysis today ... if pain makes you beautiful then dam ... I'm gonna be a stunner ... lmbo   

Thanks again 😘

[Northern Star Girl ✅]

    @Reborn57
Dear Reborn:
I am so very glad that you registered as a member here on Susan's Place Forum.

When our members ask questions and seek answers that certainly our other members may
find helpful... that is exactly what makes the Forum a place where like-minded members
can support and share thoughts and comments with each other. 

Thank you for posting and getting involved in the Forum.

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
  The Forum Administrator    Direct Email: alaskandanielle@yahoo.com

Hello

I just wanted to say thanks again for allowing me to post and thanks so much for the answers and feedback back .. it's nice to know other people have the same issues and in not some big Kiddy kiddy... lol and that I'm not alone....

By the way finished two hours of electrolysis today ... if pain makes you beautiful then dam ... I'm gonna be a stunner ... lmbo   

Thanks again 😘