what would an androgyne army look like?

[Nat]

I too drew a picture! But yours will be better, as mine is in my Diary.

I Don't know whether to picture myself as one of the Archers, loading up some spork's,  or one of the Sporknifu squad in the heat of battle!! *let out a battle cry*

..it could be "ohm nom nom".. but i don't like fruit cake..

[V M]

I'm not sure really... Uh oh, here they come marching back again

Eat spam with sporks... Eat spam with sporks... Eat spaaaaam... with sporks!!!

Spam spam spam spam... Spork spork spork sporks... Spam spam spam spam... Spork spork spork spork...

[Crow]

I too drew a picture! But yours will be better, as mine is in my Diary.

I Don't know whether to picture myself as one of the Archers, loading up some spork's,  or one of the Sporknifu squad in the heat of battle!! *let out a battle cry*

..it could be "ohm nom nom".. but i don't like fruit cake..

I think I'm a sporknifu fighter-- archery is really snazzy, but I stink at aiming at a distance! However, I'm actually pretty good at tae kwon do. Martial arts are definitely more my thing. (However, I don't know how well I'd do in the heat of battle... I'm accustomed to performance maryial arts-- which are about as effective as trying to defeat things by dancing at them. XD)

*sketches some sporkarrows into the background of zir battle picture*

[tekla]

It cracks me up when a bunch of people who never served, and would not even be asked to serve, make fun of armies.  But never forget - because its bought at such a cost you can not even begin to imagine that Orwell was right.

People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Easy to make the spork joke if your'e not the person asked to make that very real, everyday, sacrifice.

We all allow poor people to die, and rich people to lead.  If you're not rich, then your the cannon fodder.

[justmeinoz]

The Spartans wore skirts and generally gave everyone they fought a good flogging.  (just realised how that sounded!  ::)I'll just get my coat ).

If something larger than a lethal Spork is needed there is always the option of chemical warfare.  Spray the enemy with essence of Jockstrap from a chopper, or Psych-Warfare by waving photo's of the latest Vogue at them.

[tekla]

The Spartans wore skirts and generally gave everyone they fought a good flogging

And you know that how?  Since they left no written records and the only thing we know about them was written by their enemies.  Which is kinda like judging you by what your ex-girlfriend said, in which case, you're very small and have less than zero endurance.  And oh yeah, what's up with that whole "wearing a diaper and haveing them say 'come to mommy now'?"

Sources are EVERYTHING in history.

[rejennyrated]

It cracks me up when a bunch of people who never served, and would not even be asked to serve, make fun of armies.

Tekla - For the record I am sure this thread was not in anyway intended to make fun of real armies. It is, as often in this section, an offshoot of some general sillyness in another thread in which we were fantasising about the secret Androgyne Army that is lurking in the AG cave waiting to take over the world and do battle with the common enemy of fruitcake.

So please don't take it too seriously because, as always, no one here is intentionally making fun of anyone but themselves.

EDIT
The above was written before I saw the post about the spartans - but that too was I feel sure only intended as a tongue in cheek witty riposte.

[tekla]

its all well and good to make fun of stuff like our sex lives, that are, pretty funny.  There is nothing funny about the number of people who are dying every day so a bunch of fat assed people can wrap themselves in a ton of sheet metal and let their asses expand on the seat while real people die real deaths - particularly from people who never served anyone but themselves in the first place.

[justmeinoz]

We know because their enemies said so. No other Greek city-state could beat them until they "cheated" and used innovative tactics at the Battle of Leuctra.

But seriously, I thought this was a humourous thread, and you would pick up on the term "flogging" and the reference to the homosexual nature of the Spartan military state.

[tekla]

"The real traditions of the British Navy are rum, buggery and the lash."
(Winston Churchill)

You sound English to me.

[Hauser]

It cracks me up when a bunch of people who never served, and would not even be asked to serve, make fun of armies.  But never forget - because its bought at such a cost you can not even begin to imagine that Orwell was right.

People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

Easy to make the spork joke if your'e not the person asked to make that very real, everyday, sacrifice.

We all allow poor people to die, and rich people to lead.  If you're not rich, then your the cannon fodder.

and how do you know we HAVENT made at least some sacrifices? I have five members of my family currently deployed and one that aint coming back. its a different sort of sacrifice but its a sacrifice nonetheless. Ill never see my cousin again. I have to help his poor grieving widow help raise her kids without their father. Sacrifice comes in many forms. and knowing my cousin..he'd think this thread was funny as hell..and likely call it a fitting tribute. humor is its own tribute in my opinion.

anyways back to the thread...........

[rejennyrated]

particularly from people who never served anyone but themselves in the first place.

That may be an unsuported assumption actually... Many people here have had other lives before they came here, about which you would not necessarily know.

In any case as I said the fun is not intended to be poked at real armies, for which I am sure all reasonable minded people are duly grateful and repectful. This is an IMAGINARY army. The ridiculousness of which is intended to poke fun at the craziness of the androgyne way of life and NOT at the real army.

I guess it's like any joke though. Unfortunately what some peope find funny other find offensive. I don't particularly like M.A.S.H for example but loads of people found that hilarious. So the important point is to say I'm sure that no one who has posted in this thread wants in any way to offend you or indeed anyone else.

[tekla]

So, when it comes time for my funeral, so long as it's pretty much the same to you, I'll be a mourner, you be the guest of honor. 

Oh, so not so equal now is it?

And Jenny, perhaps this is some imaginary war we're in now?  The one that's lasted longer than any other war the US has ever been in?  Oh, sure, we don't put it on TV, so it doesn't count.  Go back to Harry Potter everyone.

[justmeinoz]

Tekla, black humor is often most used by those who know just how nasty it is at the pointy end, and that they or their mates stand a real risk of not coming home from work one day. There is a fair chance that a larger than average percentage of the people here have worn a uniform of some sort in an attempt to prove to themselves how masculine they were.

This is, as I understand it a humorous thread aimed at the bigotted.

I meant -flogging, as in stropping the chop, wanking, burping the worm,hand to gland combat , or for those who speak American -masturbation.

Also calling an Aussie a Pom is like calling a Alabaman a Yankee!

[tekla]

calling an Alabaman a Yankee

Hey, try that.  And could I have the video rights?

[Hauser]

So, when it comes time for my funeral, so long as it's pretty much the same to you, I'll be a mourner, you be the guest of honor. 

Oh, so not so equal now is it?

And Jenny, perhaps this is some imaginary war we're in now?  The one that's lasted longer than any other war the US has ever been in?  Oh, sure, we don't put it on TV, so it doesn't count.  Go back to Harry Potter everyone.

its not the same to me and i never said such a thing.  its different but its no less painful. waiting, wondering, not being able to know when you wake up each day if the ones you love are in pain, dying, dead or turning into monsters(this is in reference to my grandfather who was a fighter pilot in WW2. he came back and turned into a massive alcoholic who lashed out at anything and everything). Trying to find words to explain to a 4 year old and a 6 year old why their dad is never coming back. Having to take his place as a father figure because he asked it of you in a vague letter sent a week before his death.

military men take these risks. their families suffer immensely for it.

its not the same sort of sacrifice but its sacrifice nonetheless.

"Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think..."

just sayin...

[Rock_chick]

In the depths of Helena's underground bunker of evil super genius I'm just putting the finishing touches on an intercontinental ballistic spork. That should put paid to the pesky fruitcake.

[nightmarelab]

Hehe, I dunoo, just thought they might look like an army?

[justmeinoz]

I will defeat you with a ICBL- Intercontinental Ballistic Lipstick!

And as for the colours, black and green!!

[Pica Pica]

How do you think bands like that manage not to turn round to each other and laugh at the ridiculous nature of it - I hope they don't manage it - I like the image of these people a second later giggling like little girls.