Am I a hypochondriac?

[Gia]

I asked many times before should I leave chat. People there said stay. I stayed. They continued to tell me to shut up. I don't get it even if I asked beyond a subtle hint if I should leave.

Generally, all I need is time and don't need to bother anybody. I'm disabled. I hate talking about that, yet seems like I "have to" make it a point beyond common sense.

I follow the NO ASL rule, yet I constantly have to remind people I respect that rule. They continue to ask me about my age, sex, and location.

I also asked if there is anybody in chat that is deaf. No response. I noticed there are blind people. We know the peace! I don't think those in between the blind and the deaf are anything but nonchalant in these discussion, so I'll stop there on that point.

I have complete logs of everything from my experience in chat here in every room I attended and those who pm'd with me. You could easily see who gave respect to me nicely before a pm, if these were shone.

All I need is friends! I don't need genderflap'n sex, so I'm not interested in phone/cybersex. The immature chat audience never seems to understand that. Just because I don't is not an excuse to call me some unwanted normal or worse. I don't need to prove anything pervasive just to weigh in on some transition possibility, neither mine nor yours.

I'm unipolar, and I have missing children. That is already beyond torture in anybody's life. I have no desire to torture anybody, with or without sex. The chat here treated me like I don't need friends, like other chat members felt they were ok to continue and hate me (for whatever reason), like they wanted me to stay just to beat me up more, like I became the escapegoat for their cure.

In a study led by graduate student Fenna Krienen and senior author Randy Buckner, PhD, of Harvard University, researchers investigated how the medial prefrontal cortex and associated brain regions signal someone's value in a social situation. Previous work has shown that perceptions of others' beliefs guide social interactions. Krienen and her colleagues wondered whether these brain regions respond more to those we know, or to those with whom we share similar interests.

"There are psychological and evolutionary arguments for the idea that the social factors of 'similarity' and 'closeness' could get privileged treatment in the brain; for example, to identify insiders versus outsiders or kin versus non-kin," Krienen said. "However, these results suggest that social closeness is the primary factor, rather than social similarity, as previously assumed."

Source: Imaging study shows brain responds more to close friends, Medical Daily, http://www.medicaldaily.com/news/20101013/2597/imaging-study-shows-brain-responds-more-to-close-friends.htm

Today, I have no friends. Alone again in this house. They don't understand why I stay here rather than go shopping. I would love to go shopping.

[HelenW]

I'm sorry you feel this way, Gia.  I don't completely understand, however.

If anyone tells you to "shut up" then an op needs to step in.  If an op is unavailable, please save the logs and PM them to Robyn or Susan.  Oppressive behavior by the users of the site is something we want to prevent because it's obviously contrary to the site's mission.  On the other hand, if you disrupt conversations by continually posting comments that have no bearing to the subject, I can see that some people may get annoyed.  I've seen you do this and while it's easy enough to ignore (the /ignore nick command is available to all) it does prove to be disruptive at times.  You may want to consider that.

If you are getting ASL and sex requests from people then you need to tell an op about that as well.  The ops can't see who is PMing you nor can they see the conversation.  While it's a better idea to immediately tell an op - even if they all seem to be AFK they may be monitoring the chat, just post a comment about someone bothering you with an unsolicited PM - you can also provide the logs of these conversations to Robyn or Susan so they can decide the proper response.  They cannot respond if they don't know about it.

I'm not deaf but I am quite hard of hearing - I wear 2 hearing aids - and I know how hearing difficulties can isolate a person and I know that a chat room, where the written word is the primary method of communication, is very helpful in regards to connecting to other people when in real life a lack of hearing/understanding would be in the way.  The chat room is a public space, however, and conversations about sex are not against the rules as long as they remain non prurient or gratuitous and as long as the language is not obscene.  If there are conversations you feel uncomfortable with there are other rooms to go to or you can withdraw for a time, until those conversations are finished and the subject has changed.  The Deity knows I've had to do exactly that on more than one occasion.

Your continued presence in the chat rooms is welcome as long as you follow the rules and I hope you don't feel as if you've been pushed out.  Again, if you feel you have been poorly treated by another user, or even by a staff person, you have the option of letting a different op, Robyn or Susan know about it.  In addition, do please try to join and contribute to the conversations in #chat rather than continually posting non sequitors and becoming belligerent when challenged.  Thnx!

hugs & smiles
Emelye

[Janet_Girl]

Hugs Gia.  I have seen you in chat, but we have not talked.  I will be on later today as I am always.  We has chat then.

Huggles.

[Gia]

In addition, do please try to join and contribute to the conversations in #chat rather than continually posting non sequitors and becoming belligerent when challenged.

There is a real problem and there is this fog:

Other didn't take any time to get to know me, so they complained they didn't understand me. I don't post non-sequiturs, as it seems there is a group that has the typical banhammer drivel to ... "oooohhhhh, lets make someone into a troll and win goodie-goodies for getting rid of them... it'll makes us who is left feel like a closer group standing up for each other!"  These actions are no secret. They happen over and over through the years on many websites.

Consider that we barely spoke in chat, I'd imagine your statement about was carelessly accusing me over being belligerent. Through the years of me being abused, I can easy compare when I have some abusive personality. We can go through the chat logs second by second and point out the exact order of events and causes of whatever disruption you want to blame. I'll guarantee you I'm no where near being allussioned to the cause by these actual facts. I'm surprised the mods didn't step in sooner.

The fact that they didn't step in sooner, and consider that I have barely spoken with you, Emelye, and now this message... you left me looking like the reason. Maybe you wanted to justify what other mods wanted to protect their behind... maybe it wasn't unintentional. That unintentional part is the killer.

Remove the fog and we find the basic "cause" again is that transsexuals hate intersexuals! It's not a non-sequitur when people refuse and not even try to understand. They just want to spread hate and oppress and view of these two groups. People have tried to blend these two groups together, yet looks at how this has failed.

Look at how other websites know it has failed to blend the two together. A few cases of it working is not a good sign. There is a very complicated problem that is not going be solved easily by telling me off.

If this site doesn't want to enjoy the presence of intersexuals, then don't have any forums or anything open to appearant invitationals to join and try to be a part.

Trying to be a part is all I'm trying to do. Most people on chat are young, and they obvious don't understand chat like I understand chat. I don't use that against them, yet these petty events became a mountain (out of a molehill)...  only because I'm intersexual.

Look at the #ISTalk...  wow... I'm the only one in it that isn't AFK.  There is concrete fact right there. 6 names. 

By that alone, I highly doubt anything accused against me has any weight of truth except for the fact I'm different.. I'm intersexual... and they hate it. It sucks enough I had to write "they" there, but they have no idea on how to handle such differences. They want to make every intersexual a troll. Why? Because they felt someone in their past took it out on them for being homosexual/trans-whatever, and so these homosexual/trans-whatever do the exact same abuse and treatment to intersexuals. Reminds me of Gaza. This is the real problem.

"Hi TGBOT!"...  I didn't even get a response there.

[Gia]

Hugs Gia.  I have seen you in chat, but we have not talked.  I will be on later today as I am always.  We has chat then.

Huggles.

Hi!

Join me in #ISTalk and we haz chat! I'm usually talking about fashion one way or another!

*hugs*

[spacial]

Gia.

I've only ben i Susans' chat once, when I really needed some company. Those that were thre then were quite friendly to me.

I am so utterly disappointed that a few are seeking to spoil it. Asking ASL is, in my opinion offensive.

I really hope you have a better experience now that you've highlighed this problem.

Best of luck love.

[Flan]

I am so utterly disappointed that a few are seeking to spoil it. Asking ASL is, in my opinion offensive.

only it was never asked, they considered all attempts to understand gender identity or transition path to be the same as asking asl.

[04:27:32] <@Alexis> Gia what sex. and what gender do you consider yourself?
[04:27:54] <Avril> what you just explained is gender identity disorder gia
[04:27:56] <Gia> i respect the no asl 

gia: quit lieing to everyone and playing victim

[Gia]

Asking ASL is, in my opinion offensive.

Side note: Through the past few decades, we can only guess rather how many times someone meant No age/sex/location or No American Sign Language. You can guess right there how there how a conversation goes in exponentially different directions based on that. This is why the NO ASL was left at DADT politics, like someone was brilliant to get a large group to use something else.

There was a problem with that. The DADT was unspecific while NO ASL was very specific. There is an obvious age range that works best for either one. Kids would be left clueless by what DADT meant into they get into a group that provide therapy on it. With NO ASL, it would be hard to claim therapy is needed to understand.

We do have that need... yet these are age old drama between the blind and deaf. These are so well known in the online ancient chat communities we could number every sign misunderstood as some spoken word and the trouble they cause. Of course, vice versa. These knowledge is even found deep within paganism. It makes you wonder what takes so-called gifted normal people so long to understand.

We believe our differences are precious gifts. I'm not deaf as in not hearing. I'm deaf as in I hear too much in comparison to average. I hear so much it becomes useless... all noise from signals, channels, instruments, voices, all directions, they all try to combine. Much of that seems filtered to average people like they don't hear it. My system has to process it unlike normal people. Intersexualism is an easy target to say the potential in organs distinct to male or female being forced to worked together may cause unexpected results, so I don't stop there with my research.

I can tell you a sharp distinction between any trance music and any techno music. Doesn't mean I hear all the notes like people hear. I hear how clear and fine they are and volume doesn't matter. I hear all the distorted sounds, notes, and voices. Real world versus synthetics. I process sound with mental quickness faster than most, yet probably comparable to those truly blind. What some find telepathic, I find ordinary too me like a dog being able to hear a high pitch whistle out of normal human range. This is why I'm "deaf" to normal human spoken conversation.

When it comes to differences about ASL, you are right, it can seem very offensive.

[Sarah Louise]

What?

[kelly_aus]

Gia, firstly, I want to say that I have no issues with IS people, or TS/TG/CD people or whatever label you feel is appropriate. And from my experience, most in the Chat rooms will ask age simply to help relate their own experiences to those of others.. Location might be asked to again relate experiences or to enable to them to advise on services. Sex? I don't care..

The only thing I can see is that you sometimes post things that don't seem to match the ongoing conversation, this may cause some frustration in others. Yes, others, myself included, often post things that are seemingly unconnected but these are often emotive statements.

I've never seen anyone be intentionally rude to you, nor do I beleive I have been either.  Someone said this to you recently in Chat: 'Gia: don't worry about the spelling or grammar, it's the semantics that are letting you down' to which you replied: 'thinking letting me down is a problem' and, to be honest, it's neither your spelling or grammar that seems to be a problem, but semantics are..

And just as an aside, I'm not deaf, but do have significant hearing loss and likely should have hearing aids, but have learnt to get by without them - does make my therapy sessions a little tricky sometimes..

[spacial]

only it was never asked, they considered all attempts to understand gender identity or transition path to be the same as asking asl.

[04:27:32] <@Alexis> Gia what sex. and what gender do you consider yourself?
[04:27:54] <Avril> what you just explained is gender identity disorder gia
[04:27:56] <Gia> i respect the no asl 

gia: quit lieing to everyone and playing victim

I apologise if I didn't make myself very clear here.

When I was in chat I was made welcome and it was very friendly. Also, it was there when I needed it. No-one asked me or anyone else, their age, sex or location during that time.

My comment was only in response to Gia's experiences. Being someone who also has to fight through intermittent periods of depression I was hoping to give Gia some encouragement. But I sincerely apologise to the frequent chat users if my remarks seemed in any way, offencive or accusatory.

I will return to the chat soon.

[HelenW]

I'm sorry, Gia, that you chose to take some constructive criticism in such a negative way.  It seems your belligerent reaction to Robyn's concerns was not just a one time circumstance.  It's apparently your modus operendi.

I'll not engage in this subject any further in public and I'm locking this thread.  If your irrational comments continue to disrupt #chat the rules will be enforced.