happy and sad weekend

[pyradraconia]

this weekend was one of the best of my life, i finished college, went to prom... shaded with the feeling that I should enjoyed it as the girl I feel inside, the thing is, i can't put those feelings into words, saying something to my family and friends terrifies me to the extent of keeping those feelings and words to myself
If i only could say something, without the fear i feel...

[Sephirah]

Where does the fear come from, hon?

[pyradraconia]

it might be from being rejected, from some of the comments i heard of my family regarding tv adds or news about people transitioning

[Sephirah]

Have you considered writing down the things you would say to them if you did tell them? Organising your feelings and thoughts in such a way that you would like them to be understood... that can give you a goal for now, a step forward. Even if you don't use it for anything other than to get it out there and you're the only one who sees, it may go some way to relieving the frustration you feel and helping you decide what your next step should be with a clearer mind.

[pyradraconia]

i guess i can give it a try to that, who knows it might lead me to let me become the woman i feel inside, thanks

[Cindy]

Hi pyradraconia,

Sephirah, as ever, has the empathy and knowledgs. I do know many of us kept journals before we transitioned and during. For me it was a way to record how I felt and reacted in daily situations. I have never doubted my femininity, but very quickly I had documented evidence that I lived my life as a woman, even if presenting as a man. A journal is also good for when you talk to a therapist, it shows that it is not a 'flash in the pan' thought.

Parents generally may not understand.

You have a life to lead. You deserve to live it as a happy and content person who faces her life with confidence and the desire to help others.

Hugs

Cindy