Having sex has broken my gender

[Taka]

I'm not sure what to do at the moment. Right now, I want to be mainly concerned with getting my gender identity stable again. Having sex has really put a dent in it, and I'm hoping this feeling goes away soon..

you mean you seriously enjoy taking the role of a woman? if that's it, then you've nothing much to worry about. whatever you do outside the bedroom defines you much more than how you do things inside. you really should try explaining "what" it is about it that's made this dent in your gender identity, if nothing else it may at least help you sort out your own thoughts and feelings

[tekla]

It's a pretty murky world that really exists where gender, sex, and sexuality all converge like some sort of Venn diagram and though huge parts of it are very separate and clear and distinct and can be argued on the outside, on the inside of all of us its very much through a glass and darkly.  Perhaps if you took a more male (aggressive) role.

[spacial]

I take birth control, so I'm not worried about that. If I was going to get pregnant, it would've happened the first time I had sex with him (I had sex with him four times)

I'm not sure what to do at the moment. Right now, I want to be mainly concerned with getting my gender identity stable again. Having sex has really put a dent in it, and I'm hoping this feeling goes away soon..

Walter.

You have equipment, which, if you could have said anything at the time, would have been fitted differently. But for the moment, like many of us, you're stuck with it.

Lets face it, it may not be quite what you want, but it does the job and doesn't feel that bad in the process. Why not.

When I married my wife, we would both have preferred differernt equipment. But I was stuck with the plug, she has the socket. The motor still turns.

I apologise for interjecting my own experiences here. But I really don't think you should be beating yourself up over this.

Another, even bigger hug.

[cynthialee]

If having sex with this man in the standard issue female style caused you so much internal turmoil the first time.....I am left wondering WTF were you thinking doing him 3 more times?

[Walter]

Cynthia, you have a good point

I'm caught in between two things. How I feel about my gender, but also the whole sex issue

There had been times when I say to myself "Oh well having sex won't break my gender. I'll deal with it later" and then I'd have sex with him. After it all, I would be all confused about how I feel about everything including my gender

Having sex is something I've wanted for so long, and being able to have it almost means as much to me as my gender identity

There's a whole story about all of that but in the end..I need to weigh out which one means more to me. My gender, or having sex in that kind of way

I would just rather have sex as a man, and not as a woman. Then I would be content with both

@spacial, your post really sticks out to me. Thank you..and *hugs back*