Financially, Transitioning Can Be A Disaster

[Julie Marie]

I don't know one person who was financially unaffected by transitioning. 

Almost everyone I know lost their job. 

All but one got divorced and that one is hanging in the balance. 

Everyone who lost their job either ended up unemployed or in a lesser paying job. 

Most everyone lost most or all of their life savings. 

Many lost their homes and couldn't afford to buy another. 

Some live with friends or family, the rest live in a cheap apartment.

Those who fared the best retired before transitioning.  There's one exception, a friend who just landed a good job with a law firm.

All the above were financially sound and well employed prior to transitioning.

[marelivki]

Even though it happened to many, being yourself is priceless gift you can ever become If someone looks at these all losses, it may be pretty sad, but we have to ask ourselves fundamental question: What is important for me? And after that many people would realise that money, job isn't the key to happiness It's best to look ahead, and see only the positive things!

[Ann Onymous]

I don't know one person who was financially unaffected by transitioning. 

Now you do.

I stayed with the same employer and actually had subsequent promotions.  I left several years after transitioning to take a more lucrative offer in the private sector. 

[MarinaM]

Yep.

I would rather struggle for what I need than sacrifice to get what I want.

(That's a bit unclear, isn't it?  )

[AbraCadabra]

Julie,
nobody can say you haven't told them, eh!

Long live the exceptions and I'm happy to hear of one, Ann, this far.

Best,
Axelle

[Ann Onymous]

Long live the exceptions and I'm happy to hear of one, Ann, this far.

There are lots more besides me that are out there...just that most of them are not online. 

I knew of three in Austin that kept their positions with employers, one of whom also maintained full custody of the child following divorce.  None of the ones I have known in my life exhausted their life savings.  Did several get divorced who had previously been married?  Sure...but they knew going in that the marriage wouldn't survive, especially since almost all had gotten married to prove what a man they were.  Talk about a recipe for relationship disaster.

[Julie Marie]

There's only one reason this happens - the negative stigma attached to being trans.  And that leads to prejudice and discrimination.  It's amazing how they can so easily punish you through financial means when you don't conform.

[Ann Onymous]

There's only one reason this happens - the negative stigma attached to being trans.  And that leads to prejudice and discrimination.  It's amazing how they can so easily punish you through financial means when you don't conform.

Wow, who knew being a transsexual lesbian in a good'ol boys network was apparently 'conforming.'  After all, based on your post, that would be the ONLY possible way that I saw additional promotions and secured a better deal in the private sector several years later...

Are there industries or fields that might not be as accomodating?  Sure.  And admittedly I was surprised when I had no problems with my employer given I was in a position of high visibility at the time of my transition.  But to claim the inability of others to secure employment elsewhere was solely related to being transsexual is just a stretch.  The reality is that the job market has rarely been kind over the past 25 years to ANYONE seeking new work over the age of 40...there is always a kid out of college or a foreigner who will do the work for half the money, never mind that they lack the skills possessed by the experienced hand. 

[Julie Marie]

Wow, who knew being a transsexual lesbian in a good'ol boys network was apparently 'conforming.'  After all, based on your post, that would be the ONLY possible way that I saw additional promotions and secured a better deal in the private sector several years later...

You're an exception and are in two areas that are generally at the top of professions accepting of trans people, law and education.  Try mining or construction or other places the REAL good 'ol boys like to hang out.

[regan]

You're an exception and are in two areas that are generally at the top of professions accepting of trans people, law and education.  Try mining or construction or other places the REAL good 'ol boys like to hang out.

You mean like at the fire department?  Because people have transitioned successfully there as well.  Or maybe the airline industry, because there are successful transitioners there as well.  Lyn Conway would argue that engineering is a man's world, yet she transitioned successfully - heck she's got pages (and pages) of successful transitioners that probably puts a dent in your theory as well.

[Ann Onymous]

You're an exception and are in two areas that are generally at the top of professions accepting of trans people, law and education.  Try mining or construction or other places the REAL good 'ol boys like to hang out.

Corrections is not an area oft-noted for being accepting of transsexuals...especially at the regional directorate level.

[myles]

I am now where I was before transitioning and my  brief backward move had nothing to transitioning, just got tired of running my own business. I might add thought that I am not out at work, stealth. Not sure if  I would have gotten my latest promotion if I were out.
Myles

[V M]

I think everyone's situation is different, Some have it easier, others have it a bit more difficult... Some have to go through hell and high water to transition

Some people live in more accepting environments, other folks may live in totally intolerant environments and may be having to deal with unaccepting families

Some folks have families that will pay their way, some live in countries that pay for a large amount of their transition, others have little to no resource's at all and struggle

I am happy for those who have experienced a somewhat seamless transition and didn't have to experience some of the difficulties that others have had to face

But does that mean you can have no compassion or empathy for others? So why do you come to a SUPPORT SITE?

[tekla]

I think this whole "if you transition you will lose everything" victim mentality is just so much rubbish and people need to snap out of it.

You tell 'em.  I'll be particularly interested in watching the ones who pretty much have lost everything and everyone.  I'm making popcorn. 

For a lot of people up to and including this time point in the continuum, it sure has meant that.  Exactly and completely 'lose everything.'   While their stories are not universal, they are hardly singular either.  And it not just transition, lots of things in life come to points where you're going to have to risk it all, and understand going in that people do lose.  Lots of people have it happen again and again.  I know a couple of people who have lost it all a couple of times. 

For every story of a Lynn Conway, or Anne - there are people whose lives turned out very differently.  Turn of the card, roll of the dice, pay your money and take your chances.  And that's not to say that sitting on Primrose Avenue is a forever deal once you get there.  Nope.  They are evicting people every day round those parts.  Easy come, easy go.  People's lives go horribly wrong in a flash, and in a fraction of a second nothing is the same again.  And I think that kind of stuff should not necessarily prevent people from going down the road, it ought to at least inform them before they strike off.

When life looks like Easy Street there is danger at your door.

[Gravity Girl]

No you're right, I was over beligerant and I know some people loose a lot or indeed everything, but for everyone who goes through hell, I'll bet that there's at least 20 people who have a fairly easy, though not without it's rough spots transtion. So really this marks me taking another break which I'll probably try and make permanent this time, I enjoy chatting with a few people and such but I'm not built to cope with all the negativity slooshing about here...besides I have people in the real world that need my support and care.

So bye...again...I don't think I'll be missed.

[Cindy Stephens]

http://www.transequality.org/PDFs/NTDS_Exec_Summary.pdf

The results of the "transequality" survey was posted in another part of this board.  Very interesting reading.  Most of the MTF's who transitioned from the transgender group to which I belong have lost jobs, wives, and family.  The above study seems to back up my non-expert observations.  Certain fields and large company size seem to have easier times of it.  That is good.  I worry sometimes that the positive affirmations and encouragement given to sadly unprepared young people may give them a false impression of their economic and social chances.  At least from their postings, few seem like firefighters or lawyers.  Five or ten years ago one had choices regarding employment.  Not today.  As the contraction continues, people look for the weak and injured to jettison.  That is part of my job at a large construction company where I am not out.  People put up with certain physical changes I exhibit because I have degrees in two separate fields that both pertain to the industry and is an unusual combination.   I'm a twofer, the new employee description  I hope society is becoming more tolerant, but I wouldn't argue the case based on the current crop of politicians running for president. They must be appealing to some large segment of the population.  If I seem too pessimistic, I am sorry.  Some will decide to "just go for it."  I hope it is because they truly need it and understand the consequences, and not because they thought it would be "easy."  Transitioning may be a wonderful life affirming ideal, but abject poverty, social isolation, and personal rejection can crush that pretty fast.

[regan]

I wouldn't take the "survey" as much more then opinion.  How exactly did they go about collecting the sample size of 6,000+ people?  So I'm not even sure its representative of the transgender population to begin with.  As I'm assuming that they merely posted an open invitation for people to complete the survey, there are two kinds of people that complete those surveys with the largest group being people who "have an axe to grind".  Least of all, people who are happy with their transition are not going to participate in a voluntary survey designed to assess thier perceptions of discrimination.  They're simply not interested enough in the topic to participate in the survey.

So if you ask 6,000 people who feel like they were discriminated against if they felt discriminated against, I think the answer is pretty obvious.  Also, the notion of self-reported discrimination is pretty vague, its up to the responded to decide whether what they experienced was discrimination (when it might have been a completely different reason they were fired, evicted, etc); futher how do they distinguish from transgender discrimination vs racial discrimination, etc?

If nothing else, the very title "Injustice at every turn..." implies what outcome they were looking for.

"Statistics lie and liars use statistics"

[Hikari]

No you're right, I was over beligerant and I know some people loose a lot or indeed everything, but for everyone who goes through hell, I'll bet that there's at least 20 people who have a fairly easy, though not without it's rough spots transtion. So really this marks me taking another break which I'll probably try and make permanent this time, I enjoy chatting with a few people and such but I'm not built to cope with all the negativity slooshing about here...besides I have people in the real world that need my support and care.

So bye...again...I don't think I'll be missed.

FWIW, if you leave, I will miss you, but hey I understand your reasoning totally.

[Cindy Stephens]

Have you actually gone out to look at the survey?  Looked at the transequality.org web site?  I don't want to get into a spat over nothing, but they seem to have a bunch of phd's on board, they have actually issued the methodology they used, and put up their financials on their site.  Did you read it?  Now, what are your credentials again?  Sorry if I'm a bit sarcastic but it is just too easy to be dismissive of such things.  Perhaps your experience has been better than most. That's Great.  Most of the people I know have fallen under the rubric of "poor and unemployed" as suggested by this threads author.  The successful t's that I know have made accommodations to business reality (myself), work for large corp. with written employee non discrimination policies, or own business that cater to T's.  My point is that it is possible, but boy, you better be prepared and it ain't as easy as some would like you to believe.

[Anatta]

Kia Ora,

Financially, Transitioning "CAN" Be A Disaster !  Not "WILL ALWAYS" Be A Disaster !

Well that's how I read it...

However like another member said, if one is fortunate enough to live in a country where unemployment benefits are available for all[in other words one is give enough to live on-covering one's basic needs] and HRT is subsidised and where the government shows compassion and allows some of the less fortunate[money wise] get government funded surgery, then financially it's not so bad even if one does happen to loose their job...

Metta Zenda