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Transmen and Violence?

Started by Princess of Hearts, August 26, 2011, 06:20:15 PM

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Ryno

I've recently been getting some of those "snarls" from a guy t work. One day I was in the middle of asking a simple work-related question and he snapped "I'm on break." - I shrugged that one off. The other day I was loading a cart with boxes and I guess one was a little lopsided (they have to be flat or they'll topple over when we wheel them to the back) and I didn't notice it right away. So he snapped "Did you load these boxes?" Me: "Uh, yeah." And he told me in a very rough tone how they need to be loaded - I'm fine with being coached on how to do something right but he said it like he wanted to beat me for it. No idea what his problem is but I'm guessing he just sees me as a wuss and has a dominance complex. I am pre-T and I am starting to work out now and lose weight before starting T and E blockers, so hopefully in a year I'll be able to defend myself if I need to. Right now I just look like a big target for violence. Not to mention the girls there love talking to me and hanging around me - he probably assumes I'm gay and he's definitely the type who can't stand being around gay people.
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Da Monkey

I am a huge wuss when it comes to violence. If a guy gets in my face I look to the floor and step down. I do not care how that makes me look. Mostly because one hit to the face might make me go blind and/or shift my metal plates in my jaw. Hahah exaggerating a bit but I am really fragile as hell. Not worth it.

I have only punched one person in the face: my stepdad. We've been great ever since.
The story is the same, I've just personalized the name.
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Natkat

Quote from: Logan Bann on August 30, 2011, 10:28:17 AM
I've been told I look like someone who could, would, and does kill people.  Not sure what I'm doing to create this impression, but in school when I wasn't out it kept people from messing with me.  Now that I am out and am no longer a big, muscular, very boyish 'girl,' but a short, soft, quiet guy, I don't think I'll be able to keep it up.

I do tend to be a passive force in social situations, and since I am not socially inclined these tend to be few and in a stable environment, like the classroom, so I don't anticipate much trouble.  I also tend to walk in the shadow of a seven-foot brother with whom nooobody messes.  That helps too.

LOL its stange how peoples opinion chance on your gender,
as female I where seen as being pretty hardcore, boyish, I would say, wild maybe..
but seen as male its straight opposite.
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bojangles

QuoteYou wanna know how to get Capone? They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. *That's* the *Chicago* way! And that's how you get Capone. Now do you want to do that? Are you ready to do that? I'm offering you a deal. Do you want this deal?

And Squirrel is from Chicago.


Mountie Captain: I do not approve of your methods!
Ness: Yeah, well... You're not from Chicago.
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Ryno

Quote from: bojangles on August 30, 2011, 01:56:08 PM

Mountie Captain: I do not approve of your methods!
Ness: Yeah, well... You're not from Chicago.

I'm going to have to buy this movie on payday. I miss it.

@ Monkey: lmfao... don't think I've heard this story before.

I've never thrown a punch, and I think that's why I have a lot of dreams where I throw punches but get seriously anxious and my arms get all rubbery and I just can't hurt the person. I do feel I can get out of a potentially violent situation with diplomacy but I'm definitely going to take self-defense training just in case.

I don't know, when I'm in a confrontation with someone like the guy I work with, I end up doubling up and holding eye contact. I don't even realize I do it, but my language is always carefully chosen to avoid a fight. I think I got that from all the terrifying confrontations with an old friend and her crazy fundamentalist grandmother. The girl would often end up crying but she'd never look away and never look weak. Tears streaming down her cheeks with a look of fire in her eyes. It was intense.
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insideontheoutside

I've got axis powers running through my veins (Italian, Russian, German lol) so it was natural that I ended up with a crazy temper. However, while I let it flow like the freakin' dark side of the force in my youth (I had knocked some kids teeth out, body slammed some other kid ... the list goes on ... my parents were always in the principals office) I realized that I didn't want to go to jail so I should curb the violence. I will say, that all the people that I was ever violent to, had it coming (the kid I body slammed for instance had spent weeks taunting me and then had run up behind me and thrown a hand full of dirt down the back of my shirt then got me in the eyes with another one as soon as I turned around). I like to think I taught a number of very valuable lessons to those people. As for violence I've personally experienced, one was from a gang banger - the push and shove you type to intimidate you. I didn't provoke him. He was wasted and I was in his "path". A few other times it was women - mostly screaming matches or super lame stuff like taking off a shoe and trying to hit me with it (what I call the, "Jerry Springer Technique"), followed by another popular technique of trying to do some hair pulling or "slap fighting". These instances where mostly where I was trying to break up something going on between people I knew and wasn't just some random chick on the street. Other than that, I'm super observant to "situations" and individuals who are giving off that violence vibe, and have been able to avoid other things that probably could have gone sideways.
"Let's conspire to ignite all the souls that would die just to feel alive."
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hwytoaster

Yes. The whole rule about men not hitting women doesn't apply to unattractive women. Straight cis men are neanderthals and think that fat/ugly women need to be killed. They don't think twice or hesitate to physically assault a female they find unattractive. I've been in a lot of fights with cis-men starting as early as 13 years old. And yes, grown adult men wanted to beat up on a 13 year old girl for being overweight. I had to learn to fight and defend myself. When I was homeless, at least a few times, men would come up and start hitting me because of my looks, but by then I was strong & skilled enough to defend myself and knock them on their a**es.
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Michael Joseph

I'm a hippie at heart and always have been, and am friends with other cis guys like me. The only real fight ive ever been in, I was 10 years old and i was hangin out with my buddy and his neighbor came over. Me and his neighbor, who was a year older than me, got into some argument that started over if the patriots or the greenbay packers were better.. and then he came at me so out of self defense, I beat the ->-bleeped-<- out of him. I threw a few punches and then had him on the ground kicking him in the ribs. He ran home crying, and my buddy was just standing there watching the whole time like damn. I did feel bad after, and hope i never get in a situation where i have to use violence, because i really  dont like to.