World's Dumbest Crook

[BeverlyAnn]

This is a true story that was on the news this evening in Atlanta.  Recently, a guy went into a health club located in a shopping center, cut the lock off one of the lockers and stole some credit cards out of a persons wallet.  The thief then went to an electronics store in the same shopping center, used one of the credit cards and bought himself a huge wide screen television.  During the purchase, this rocket scientist let the sales clerk talk him into buying the extended warranty which he promptly filled out giving his home address.  Needless to say, the police didn't have a very difficult time apprehending said genius.

Bev

[Hazumu]

As Foghorn Leghorn used to say:

That boy's about as sharp as a sack of wet mice!

Or how about, "Dumb as a box of rocks."

Your turn...  >

Karen

[cindianna_jones]

"We're dirt farmers.  We eat dirt."

I betchya he'd do it again if given the opportunity. 

Cindi

[BeverlyAnn]

As Foghorn Leghorn used to say:

That boy's about as sharp as a sack of wet mice!

Your turn...  >

Karen

How about "If his IQ was 3 points lower, he would be a vegetable."

I betchya he'd do it again if given the opportunity. 

Cindi

Cindi, he probably would but since this type of thing (credit card theft) has been epidemic around here lately and judges are getting pretty rough in sentencing, it will probably be several years before he gets a chance.

[Maebh]

He is the type that couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewry.
Slanté 
LL&R
Maebh

[LynnER]

How about the bank robber that went in through the ventelation system, fell and broke his leg or sprained his ankel or something... Took all the survalence tapes, THEN tried to sue the bank useing the videos as proof he hurt himself there?

[Melissa]

Or the one who tried to break into a bank only to realize once he got there it was a sperm bank?

Melissa

[Maebh]

Or the one who tried to break into a bank only to realize once he got there it was a sperm bank?

Melissa

At least the vampire who broke into the Blood-bank got it right!

LL&R
Maebh

[Melissa]

At least the vampire who broke into the Blood-bank got it right!

LL&R
Maebh

Yeah, it gives new meaning to the term "blood money".

Melissa

[SusanKay140]

My favorite was years ago.  A bandit walked into a liquor store, pulled a 38 out of his pocket and pointed it at the clerk, announcing that "This is a stickup."  At that point the barrel fell off the gun, the bullet cylinder dropped to the floor, followed by the firing mechanism.  He looked at the remaining butt in his hand, stuck it in his pocket, said "Never mind", and left.  The clerk was reported as unable to follow due to a serious outbreak of ROFLAO.

The amazing thing is how often these idiots manage new variations of stupid man walking.

Susan Kay

[Dennis]

When I was in Britain a few years ago, there was an article in the paper about a bunch of guys who rushed out of a car outside an off-licence (that's a liquor store), bearing guns and clubs and rushed the door. After a number of minutes of trying to get in and failing, during which time the clerk had called the police, the police arrived and arrested them.

The clerk said, when interviewed, "I'm just glad they tried to get in the exit and didn't try the entrance."

Dennis

[angelsgirl]

A few berries shy of a fruitcake.

A couple pints short of a six-pack?

If you gave them a penny for their thoughts, you'd have change coming!

>

[ZachP]

I heard that story very funny, I heard one about a guy in alabama who locked himself in a bathroom in a K-mart store and set-up a methlab with products from the store for hours!!!!