Hi! I'm an M2F transsexual on hormones but no SRS (and no plans to) been passing for a few years now. A little history: in 6th grade when I felt my voice starting to change, I was so determined to maintain a "girly" voice that I took care of vocal training right then just by forcing it out. So I talked like a girl even as a boy, which got me mercilessly teased, but anyway!
I've found over the past couple years I've had sort of difficulties speaking with my voice. Basically, I try to talk but it comes out weak and some words I say come out as an airy whisper and not a vocal sound. I get so self-conscious about it and just blame it on a cold. It's not ALWAYS like this, if I "warm up" my voice it gets better, and some days my voice is totally fine. I'm thinking maybe my anxiety about it is causing my throat to tighten up and not produce sounds that I know I'm able to do. It's as if my voice needs a warm up every morning or I go through it sounding airy and not really falsetto but sort of. But I know I'm capable of using the female voice thats normal sounding, and I do use it when it's there, but this is something I've been dealing with more and more.
I'm wondering if my vocal chords are okay, or what's causing this. Anyone else experience this? Like you're speaking and one word comes out as just a whisper so you have to repeat yourself?
I also sometimes have it "crack" and it sounds like I got a frog in my throat for a minute. I HATE when that happens its so humiliating. People who knows my situation tell me it doesn't sound like a manly voice crack, just like a burp or a frog in my throat, but still. It causes so much anxiety.