That Androgyne Moment

[martinb]

Has anyone else had them?I mean apart from the usual abuse and stuff that sometimes happens.One has stuck with me for some reason and its quite funny.(Well to me anyway). I like to run to stay fit and i needed a new pair of running shoes.So i went to a runners shop here in Chadderton.The shoes were all laid out in racks on the wall,and the guy in the store was really nice and let me take my time looking at everything.So i looked at the soles and the prices and colours and everything and i finally made up my mind."Can i try those please?"i asked innocently."In a size eight".The guy just looked at me with his face kind of frozen into a mask.I was a bit nonplussed until he said"they`re ladies shoes"but his expression said"what are you thinking you jerk".I could`nt believe it,they(the shoes)were`nt bright pink or anything like that,i just thought them nice and could see myself in them,speeding along looking great,i really wanted them too.Eventually,flustered and embarrassed i bought something else and left,but i was really upset because i could`nt have the shoes i really wanted.Looking back now it makes sense to me and it does make me laugh,but i wish i could have brazened it out and bought them!

[mimpi]

Why are women's running shoes always in nicer colours? Unfortunately they don't fit me but it's just not fair that the men's ones have such terrible colour schemes.

You should have bought them, doesn't really take much doing. I used to buy men's trainers for my ex in Muslim Indonesia when she was scared of doing it, no one ever batted an eyelid as they were more interested in making the sale.

[ZaidaZadkiel]

wait, so you didn't buy them because they were women, or there was no available size for that model ?
I mean, the guy shouldnt care at all what you end up buying, its your money, it's their product, anything else is superfluous.
as long as you could get the size you wanted, of course.

For ex, I'm size 7 and girl shoes go all up to size 6 here. It's rare to find nice large size shoes... which is why i like my combat boots

[Eva Marie]

Its the salesperson's job to assist you with any questions and to ring up your purchase. The fact that you selected a woman's running shoe is absolutely none of his business.

If a salesperson EVER makes a scene with me while i'm trying to spend money i'll call over a manager to have a chat about his employee's attitude.

A good response to him would have been "yes, and your point is?".

[ativan]

   I couldn't find the shoe I wanted in men's, so I asked what she had in woman's. She looked at me a little odd, asked me what size. I knew that, but it is on the large size for women's I guess. She went and got them, they looked better than the men's, fit was perfect. I said I'll take them and she asked me if I realized they were woman's. Twice now the women's shoe thing. I just leaned over her a little and said "yes I know, does that bother you?" She was so flustered she could hardly ring them up.
   So I really like the shoes and wanted to get a second pair. So I went back a couple weeks later. Sales girl comes up, the chit chat, and I explained to her what I wanted. They were discontinued and showed me what they had left, wouldn't fit. Then,,,...Then she asked if I had looked in the men's section, telling me I might have a chance in a different color. Ahh...No luck. I thanked her and winked and she just smiled and winked back.
   Now yah gotta remember I look like I should be a Cowboy. Or at least carry a sawed off double barrel. It was an Androgyne moment and she knew it was, too. I get a little glow just thinking about it.

Ativan

[martinb]

wait, so you didn't buy them because they were women, or there was no available size for that model ?
I mean, the guy shouldnt care at all what you end up buying, its your money, it's their product, anything else is superfluous.
as long as you could get the size you wanted, of course.

For ex, I'm size 7 and girl shoes go all up to size 6 here. It's rare to find nice large size shoes... which is why i like my combat boots :

I did`nt buy them because the guy in the shop really freaked me out,his look said" don`t even think about wanting to buy these".I felt humiliated ,like i`d done something disgusting.I suppose i`m a bit sensitive but i could`nt wait to get out of the place.It was`nt a problem with sizes or anything at all.I`m a size eight so it was`nt that.I`ve never forgotten it,but now its just funny!

[ZaidaZadkiel]

Don't let you be treated that way. just, don't allow it.

Also, buy those same shoes in another store.

[Ember]

Also, buy those same shoes in another store.

And then go back to the manager of the first store and tell them you were made so uncomfortable in their store that you had to buy from someone else.

[shelly]

Must admit i used to feel really guilty about buying girly suff for myself, but the older i get the less i care what other people think, been buying womans trainers for years now, infact wife nearly died when i brought a pair of blokes a few months back. You would think though with the world in economic turmoil, companies would be bending over backwards to sell their goods to whoever you are.

[runalan]

Lovely to read about someone else who goes in for running. I cant say that I've ever had any trouble about buying running gear.  For shoes, the shops I go to are usually open ones where you can go and choose what you want and try it on, and the staff are more concerned to keep out of your way and carry on chatting among themselves, and when it comes to the actual paying, all they are interested in is whether your credit card works.  There's a bit more interaction with the staff for shorts and vests.   I wear either women's or men's running shorts as I please - there's not much difference, but I've never had any hassle in buying them. Of course, running gear for women incudes a running bra, and I've bought that too without query. I sometimes wear it, but I can get away with  not wearing one.

[martinb]

Wow the assistants in your store sound really laid back!Wish i could find somewhere like that!

[Kinkly]

I've found shoping for clothes alot easier when I'm wearing female clothes I don't get the "those are ladies shoes" scomments when wearing a skirt.  Most places are fine but some shops that just sell "clothes for females will only let me try Items on if there is noone else using any of the change rooms.  I haven'thad any problems with spending my money in those shops though it is the shops that cater for bothmale and female people that I used to haveissues with but not any more (not whilewearing female clothes to start with)

[foosnark]

I was in a shoe store the other day.  Like many, it has about 7 aisles of womens' shoes and 3/4 of an ajisle of men's.  They arranged it so the largest womens' sizes were near the mens', so I had the chance to try on a pair of boots I liked kind of on the sly.  I should have bought them, but honestly I already feel weird about having more shoes than my wife.  (Two pairs of fuzzy slippers, brown boots, black boots, black snow boots, white sneakers, purple sneakers, old sneakers for yard work, two plairs of Vibram FiveFingers, sandals, dress shoes, jikatabi, indoor tabi... and I still might get the hybrid sneaker/tabi things I saw once.)

[caseyy]

Yeah, what type of tuff you buy is none of their business, they are there to make a sale, not moral judgements.

I bought my first tie last week, along with a dress shirt, pants, cardigan (I think that's what they're called) for my graduation. Looked pretty sharp near the end but I got some filthy ass looks from two dressing room people, one male and one female.

[Sevan]

Oh I bet you'll look so snazzy Casey!! I've got a blue dress shirt with a white tie that I quite love.

[Julian]

Awesome. Cardigans are fantastic. As are ties.

I don't own any ties yet, but when it's cold I wear scarves tied four-in-hand. Stayin' classy.

[cynthialee]

A good lie that saves face might be in order occaionaly.

"I am getting shoes for my daughter and we happen to have the same size foot."


Have you seen how big the kids are getting lately? It is plausible.

[Kiss]

I was in the city on Friday night and a *little person walked past and gave me this look like WTF is that?!?
I guess it means I don't look like my dad...

[Kareil]

A good lie that saves face might be in order occaionaly.

"I am getting shoes for my daughter and we happen to have the same size foot."


Have you seen how big the kids are getting lately? It is plausible.

*giggles maniacally, imagining Dad doing that*

Feet *are* getting big - I buy him shoes that way!  Though he's never bought me any, at least not any that came from the women's section.  He's not much of a shopper...he sends me out for his socks.

To avoid confusion while shoe shopping, if I have to ask for a size, I ask in Euro sizes.  A men's 41 and a women's 41 is the same thing, and often more uniform between manufacturers.  (note:  this does *not* work for Havianas - it's not the same as a *Brazilian* 41...)

[soulfairer]

Has anyone else had them?I mean apart from the usual abuse and stuff that sometimes happens.One has stuck with me for some reason and its quite funny.(Well to me anyway). I like to run to stay fit and i needed a new pair of running shoes.So i went to a runners shop here in Chadderton.The shoes were all laid out in racks on the wall,and the guy in the store was really nice and let me take my time looking at everything.So i looked at the soles and the prices and colours and everything and i finally made up my mind."Can i try those please?"i asked innocently."In a size eight".The guy just looked at me with his face kind of frozen into a mask.I was a bit nonplussed until he said"they`re ladies shoes"but his expression said"what are you thinking you jerk".I could`nt believe it,they(the shoes)were`nt bright pink or anything like that,i just thought them nice and could see myself in them,speeding along looking great,i really wanted them too.Eventually,flustered and embarrassed i bought something else and left,but i was really upset because i could`nt have the shoes i really wanted.Looking back now it makes sense to me and it does make me laugh,but i wish i could have brazened it out and bought them!

If you don't want simply to say "I want to buy these, you mo***", you could exploit his own comment: "oh, but take a look at these. I didn't recall they were female shoes, and they look nice. Don't you think?"

If he answers "but they are femme shoes", ask "how do you fear that?".



Almost the same happened to me. I searched for boots (dressed as male) and got some of those looks.