Stagnation

[Keaira]

You can do better! You stopped letting your dysphoria control your life, I know that you are strong enough without him. Not a single person here has said "wow, what a great guy. "
I know I'd want a boyfriend that makes others say " wow, you are so lucky to have a man like that. "
That to me says it all. If you can't be an equal in a relationship, then it's anything but one.
But, don't be swayed by our opinions. You know him best. You must decide for yourself and follow your heart.
*hugs*

[Mahsa Tezani]

You can do better! You stopped letting your dysphoria control your life, I know that you are strong enough without him. Not a single person here has said "wow, what a great guy. "

I suffer from no dsyphoria in this situatiob. I can land any guy who wants me...Wait, didn't I just add you on my fb?

[Mahsa Tezani]

Honey,

When you post in public and ask opinions you should expect to hear opinions you may not like. As far as appearances it is all perceptions, and witout the benefit of fully know you all I can go is by your appearance. I look at the bags under your eyes and the skin in your neck and well, to me you look like you are in your late 30's or early 40's. No offense intended !

No one has ever mistaken me for 30-40... Ever. Of course, I hang out with straight men...not a bunch of catty women. You don't even have your age in your profile. You used to be a married and have children, so a lot older than me.

Blah. Show your face why don't you?

And bring it on....

[Keaira]

I suffer from no dsyphoria in this situatiob. I can land any guy who wants me...Wait, didn't I just add you on my fb?

Mmm... I don't know. It's possible. LOL. This is my real name.
the point I was getting at was you took control of your life. You didn't let it control you.

[Mahsa Tezani]

As far as dating a married man, he is braking the law, adultery, and you are knowingly part of it. Immoral in my opinion. So that you know where I am coming from, let me  tell you I was at the other end, the receiving end. It is very hurtful to be betrayed by your spause. In my case, i filed for divorce based in adultery, and in said document I named the other party involved in the adultery. MY adulterous ex-spause "boyfriend" name and her name are now in the public record as adulterous !  I hope you reconsider your position.

What kind of backwater Virginia town do you live in? In case you didn't know, adultery is legal in California.

[Mahsa Tezani]

It was devastating on my 6 kids. The oldest is boy with her, the youngest girl sort of talks to her, the rest (3 boys +1 girl) do not want to hear her name mentioned. BTW all live with me; I have sole custody and the house and everything. I won nothing, after 5 years, I still cry about her loss. I think I Will always love her and miss her, but I cannot and will not forgive her for the pain she inflicted to the kids.

Masha:

Sorry for the drama, I do not mean to hijack your thread, but you have stirred my soul.

Jen61

Bleh. Sorry you lost your kids. But you never responded to my "bring it on"....How old are you? 50?

[Jen61]

Bleh. Sorry you lost your kids. But you never responded to my "bring it on"....How old are you? 50?

1) Do not take it so personally. I am  not going to fight with you because you feel offended as you look 40 years old in your picture. Perhaps a new picture ?

2) After a second look at your picture, I noticed an abnormal bulging of your left jugular. Do you suffer of shortness of breath, your skin kinds look bluish. It looks like you may  have a hart condition. Perhaps see a doctor !

3) Adultery is not legal in California, the crime of adultery was taken from the books, they did not lehgalized. See { These days, it is NOT against the law in California to commit adultery. HOWEVER, California Family Code section 720 clearly states that in a marriage, "Husband and wife contract toward each other obligations of mutual respect, fidelity, and support."} Commiting infidelity will affect the outcome in a divorce. One can only hope the poor wife will take the old windbag to the cleaners before she gets more sick.

Jen61

[Jen61]

1) Do not take it so personally. I am  not going to fight with you because you feel offended as you look 40 years old in your picture. Perhaps a new picture ?

2) After a second look at your picture, I noticed an abnormal bulging of your left jugular. Do you suffer of shortness of breath, your skin kinds look bluish. It looks like you may  have a hart condition. Perhaps see a doctor !

3) Adultery is not legal in California, the crime of adultery was taken from the books, they did not lehgalized. See { These days, it is NOT against the law in California to commit adultery. HOWEVER, California Family Code section 720 clearly states that in a marriage, "Husband and wife contract toward each other obligations of mutual respect, fidelity, and support."} Commiting infidelity will affect the outcome in a divorce. One can only hope the poor wife will take the old windbag to the cleaners before she gets more sick.

Jen61

Just ask the terminator how much he is paying to Maria

Jen61

[Mahsa Tezani]

1) Do not take it so personally. I am  not going to fight with you because you feel offended as you look 40 years old in your picture. Perhaps a new picture ?

2) After a second look at your picture, I noticed an abnormal bulging of your left jugular. Do you suffer of shortness of breath, your skin kinds look bluish. It looks like you may  have a hart condition. Perhaps see a doctor !

3) Adultery is not legal in California, the crime of adultery was taken from the books, they did not lehgalized. See { These days, it is NOT against the law in California to commit adultery. HOWEVER, California Family Code section 720 clearly states that in a marriage, "Husband and wife contract toward each other obligations of mutual respect, fidelity, and support."} Commiting infidelity will affect the outcome in a divorce. One can only hope the poor wife will take the old windbag to the cleaners before she gets more sick.

Jen61

1) LMAO.

2) Oh my god, you broke my heart. Actually, wait you didn't. It continues on with your "I know everything" theme.

3) You have issues with your marriage. Issues which should have been resolved before you went on your personal adventures of self discovery. 40+, in a mid life crisis, with the wife gone...raising the kids alone. I'd refocus your priorities. You seem to have issues accepting the fact that your wife cheated on you and is gone... I think I know her reasoning. But they aren't appropriate for this thread.

As for us, we are done. Leave me alone.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Why's he dating you if he's homophobic?

[Mahsa Tezani]

Why's he dating you if he's homophobic?

I don't know. I mean he knew me as a guy...Not well. But I was extremely flaming back then.

[Fighter]

I don't know. I mean he knew me as a guy...Not well. But I was extremely flaming back then.

Sounds to me like he's in a bit of denial. He may be using you as a way to make excuses for himself as to why he's not gay or bi or anything. Maybe because you're trans he feels he can tell himself he's straight because he's dating a woman, even though he gets turned on by the male bits? It's kind of like those guys who think it's gay to give another guy a ->-bleeped-<- but it's not gay to get one from another guy. At least that's what it sounds like to me. I don't think I can make an honest assessment since I don't know the guy in real life, though.

Maybe you should bring this issue up to him? Communication about these types of things are supposed to be key to a relationship after all. Then again, I'm not exactly good at this sort of thing so take what I say with a grain of salt. Also sorry if I sound offensive in any way, I really don't mean to be :X.

[Mahsa Tezani]

Sounds to me like he's in a bit of denial. He may be using you as a way to make excuses for himself as to why he's not gay or bi or anything. Maybe because you're trans he feels he can tell himself he's straight because he's dating a woman, even though he gets turned on by the male bits? It's kind of like those guys who think it's gay to give another guy a ->-bleeped-<- but it's not gay to get one from another guy. At least that's what it sounds like to me. I don't think I can make an honest assessment since I don't know the guy in real life, though.

Maybe you should bring this issue up to him? Communication about these types of things are supposed to be key to a relationship after all. Then again, I'm not exactly good at this sort of thing so take what I say with a grain of salt. Also sorry if I sound offensive in any way, I really don't mean to be :X.

Already did and the answer is, "I am not gay". I mean with men who date ts's...I expect there to at least be some bi-sexuality due to the penis and male past.

I prefer bi men and men whom were closer to the guys I used to date. The whole transition was great for me, since I turned out great. But really, this is not the life I want. I don't want to go to comic cons and movie shows and flirt with the men there. Thought I would be living back in SF in Cole Valley with my yuppy fiancee.

[~RoadToTrista~]

I can't really say because Idk him either, but I think he just sees you as some girl on the side. I don't think he necessarily likes men, but I do think he's fetishizing you.

[Mahsa Tezani]

I can't really say because Idk him either, but I think he just sees you as some girl on the side. I don't think he necessarily likes men, but I do think he's fetishizing you.

He doesn't typically like ts's.. CDsand DQs freak him out. He likes me and this youtube one. But typically he avoids my kind of women.

I have no idea why I was the exception. He got me when I started passing but wasn't exactly pretty. If he had persued me now, I'd be like "I can land someone way younger, bye"

[Graverobber9]

Just dump 'em.

And stop being a tease.

[Mahsa Tezani]

Just dump 'em.

And stop being a tease.

Whats wrong with being a tease? I need to get my jimmies on too. 

[Akashiya Moka]

Honey,

When you post in public and ask opinions you should expect to hear opinions you may not like. As far as appearances it is all perceptions, and witout the benefit of fully know you all I can go is by your appearance. I look at the bags under your eyes and the skin in your neck and well, to me you look like you are in your late 30's or early 40's. No offense intended !

Lol, really? Her neck looks fine to me, and if you want to talk about bags under the eyes, mine are wayyy worse imo, ...and I'm basically a kid. Its mostly genetic (thanks mom); although the fact that I've always been a night person since forever, probably has something to do with it. Mahsa probably just parties a lot; she is a disco shark after all.

2) After a second look at your picture, I noticed an abnormal bulging of your left jugular. Do you suffer of shortness of breath, your skin kinds look bluish. It looks like you may  have a hart condition. Perhaps see a doctor !

~Yeah, now we realllly know you're just trolling. Next time, remember(!), subtlety is your friend.

[Mahsa Tezani]

Lol, really? Her neck looks fine to me, and if you want to talk about bags under the eyes, mine are wayyy worse imo, ...and I'm basically a kid. Its mostly genetic (thanks mom); although the fact that I've always been a night person since forever, probably has something to do with it. Mahsa probably just parties a lot; she is a disco shark after all.

~Yeah, now we realllly know you're just trolling. Next time, remember(!), subtlety is your friend.

I would party... But there's a reason why I am not and it's the OP in this thread.

But I use to use a lot of cocaine, xtc, and whatever else we got our hands on. Not anymore, I go out and drink a sugar free redbull.

[AbraCadabra]

Interesting is - you got yourself one lot of attention with your "problem" - here at least.

Maybe, you just need more attention from your man and all be solved?
Now since it is any guy you can get you want, why not start look for better?
Though if you are co-dependent by now, maybe see a shrink if the pain gets too bad?

Now, if you can't... a thread like this one will only go on for so long, and then what?!

Attention withdrawal... back to square one, um.

In the end you made your bed, so now you have to lay down in it. It's really simple as that.

Even coke will only keep things going for so long. So, whilst it lasts - enjoy the ride, but maybe stop querying the side effects of your life style, and all those expectations you busy with?

Thoughtful,
Axelle,

PS: Sorry I'm an old, old, EST-hole and I leaned so see the signs... um.
Just to say it for some add perspective.
Process is called: Negative feedback, and you supposed to say: Thank you for sharing your truth - and then may think and ->-bleeped-<- you too :-) And that's OK, so long we do not say it, um. Hug.