Flaunt it while you got it.

[Darrin Scott]

Recently some comments have been made to me regarding me binding. I'm a bigger guy (DDD) and so binding isn't easy for me, but I do my best to make it work. People tell me it looks horrible and I should just "flaunt what I got while I have it". Meaning, I should wear a bra and use my feminine traits while I have them for my benefit. The idea of going back to wearing a bra is very depressing and I honestly feel better/more confident wearing a binder. Granted, it's not perfect, but it's better than the alternative. I'm sick of hearing comments from people about my chest. It makes me very dysphoric and really makes me angry. I can't afford surgery right now and I'm waiting to hear if my insurance will pay for a breast reduction. I'm waiting to get on T. My therapist is jerking me around. I'm just tired of having to defend myself all the time and who I am. Anyone else have this issue?

[JohnAlex]

Have you just started binding?  Because binding gets easier and look better over time.  At least in my experience. Not to be gross, but it's like my boobs got squishier and then could more easily get flat.

What are you using to bind with?

I think that's just so rude of people to make comments to you about your chest. 
Just hang in there, man.  You'll get on T eventually and then things won't be so bad. 

This is just what I do.  when I'm feeling bad about how things are now, I go and I daydream about what it will be like when I get on T or after I get top surgery.  and it makes me happy.  It reminds that what I'm working for.  I'm like at the bottom of a mountain trying to climb it, and I need to keep reminding myself of the top of the mountain, because that's what I'm working so hard for.
Idk if that helps.

good luck, man

[Darrin Scott]

Thanks man.

I started consistently binding last June. So......5 months? I hope it gets easier. When I can, I can post a picture. I know it's bad, but I bind with a XL tri-top and a L tri-top.

[Sharky]

I also have huge tits and my grandma has said the same to me.
I have a bunch of button up shirts with double chest pockets. They work really well at hiding the lumps.

[insideontheoutside]

IMO that is ->-bleeped-<-ty advice. Seriously, why "flaunt" what you totally hate and what makes you uncomfortable just because it's there?

Also, now that it's colder weather (unless you're south of the equator), strategic layering can be your friend.

[Felix]

They just don't understand.

[GentlemanRDP]

Have you just started binding?  Because binding gets easier and look better over time.  At least in my experience. Not to be gross, but it's like my boobs got squishier and then could more easily get flat.

This is strange, but completely true.

Binding your breasts for an extended period of time starts to break down the tissue - of course, it can be bad too, and can sort of deform them through the years if you bind really tight.


But, I know how you feel.
Before I began to transition, I was always told how 'cute' and 'pretty' I was.
These comments made me want to hang myself (Light-heartedly, mind you)

Unfortunately, A lot of people are not going to be able to relate to how you feel about your chest, Which is exactly why they tell you to 'flaunt' it, because they have no clue what's it like to have that kind of feeling about your body.

If binding makes you feel better, keep doing it - as long as you research the risks and play it safe!

Good luck!

[he who shall not be named]

I feel you, dude. I've gotten comments along those lines too -- mostly family members berating me for not ~appreciating my "nice" breasts and how they would like to have bigger ones too. :/ They just don't get it. I usually roll my eyes and change the subject, but I'm thinking I should start telling them to knock it off.

[Noah James]

Yeah, I know what you mean. A little while back, after explaining to a friend of mine about chest dysphoria, I got the "I know you don't like them, but you might as well use what you have" comment, and it nearly drove me up a wall. Had I not just explained this? 

It's irritating, but the "Flaunt it while you got it" comments will happen, and there will be people that just don't understand (Hell, there's gonna be a lot of those people). The point is to just brush it off and keep going. I know it sounds silly, but sticks and stones, man, sticks and stones - don't let what other people say get to you. You know who you are on the inside, and with time, who you look like on the outside will line up with that. Just gotta have a little faith in the future, my friend. Things have a way of working themselves out after all.

[Mr. X]

Well, to that i've just said that the extra weight makes my back hurt. Pure and simple. If they want to have a pair to stare at, there's a hundred other people with breasts.




-Xx

[Darrin Scott]

Hey guys,

Thanks for the input and encouragement.

Here are two images I took with my cell phone. I'm wearing a XL tri-top. I am NOT asking if I pass, I'm asking if my chest really looks that girly and bad... You can be honest.

[Sharky]

Looks ok from the front. The side looks like there is a big bump in the chest, but the phone is kinda covering where it looks like the bump converges.
I know this sounds like it doesn't make sense, but the double front gets me flatter than the tri top. I push them down and apart as far as they will go.

[Mr. X]

+1 for what Sharky said.


-Xx

[JohnAlex]

Yeah, same as what Sharky said.

It looks fine from the front.  the side angle is a little more obvious.

[N.Chaos]

Also agreeing with Sharky. The side angle is the death of me too, though.

And unfortunately, Felix pretty much summed it all up in a few words. Most people can't even fathom how it feels.

[vik2ray]

i know how you feel. almost everyone i know seems to love my chest. i get annoyed with it. Te comments that aggravate me the most are why do you want to get rid of them when men will give you money jewelry and cars to touch them or look at them. i get so repulsed by this it makes me physically sick. i hear it that often its become somewhat of a pity fest and a few people who think they are my Friends are planning a farewell party for my chest. like they expect me to show them what i have and then say you wont see these again cos they are getting removed. mine aren't small or big they are a good b cup. which i hate with a passion. my response to some comments are if you like em once i have them removed you can get them sewn onto you. that seems to keep people at bay. but it is frustrating. but you look great in the pics. 

[Jeatyn]

the "oh but it's such a shame" comments drive me up the wall.

You look pretty much the same as me in a binder - to combat the weirdness of the side angle I wear shirts over my t-shirts. Thank god for winter

We're a similar build only I have a shelf for a rear end, which looks horrendously accentuated when I bind. Jealous of your flat butt

[Darth_Taco]

I just wanted to say that I actually know a guy that does this o.o. Since he's still too young transition medically without parental permission, he decided to "take advantage of them". He uses them to get other guys into bed. Normally, I'm not one to judge other people's sex lives as long as ->-bleeped-<- is kept legal, but this kid just baffles me. He's showing he has absolutely no self respect. Forget the boob thing, it shows that he's willing to put himself down for a few minutes of fun with people who don't care about him enough to respect him for who he is.

I know it really doesn't have to do much with the current conversation, just wanted to tell that to someone because I don't know who to tell! D:

[Sharky]

I just wanted to say that I actually know a guy that does this o.o. Since he's still too young transition medically without parental permission, he decided to "take advantage of them". He uses them to get other guys into bed. Normally, I'm not one to judge other people's sex lives as long as ->-bleeped-<- is kept legal, but this kid just baffles me. He's showing he has absolutely no self respect. Forget the boob thing, it shows that he's willing to put himself down for a few minutes of fun with people who don't care about him enough to respect him for who he is.

I know it really doesn't have to do much with the current conversation, just wanted to tell that to someone because I don't know who to tell! D:

I think he's missing a business opportunity.

[Darth_Taco]

I think he's missing a business opportunity.

He insists on giving it away for free D:<