Ah. This. So, I'm 27 years old. Pre-transition [before Testosterone, actively dressing as male, etc] I was most always clocked at up to five years younger than my actual age. At 19, strangers thought I was 14. But now that I'm pushing 30, it's become a sore subject, and one that makes me deeply uneasy. Let's make it clear- I don't care about my age. But other folks do. I look very young- I have huge eyes, I'm pretty short and narrow, kind of elfin looking. Teenagers assume I am a teenager, and when I'm revealed to be up to ten years older than them, it's an uncomfortable situation. I don't ever want to seem like a creeper-dude who hangs out with children. I attend conventions [anime, sci-fi, etc]. And there is of course an older demographic there. It's not hard to find folks in their late twenties, but that's not who I end up fraternizing with. The average 15 year old is honestly squicked out to realize I'm 12 years their senior, and that's a bad feeling. Suddenly they've been casually shooting the breeze [boy/girl problems, laments about school, parents, part-time jobs] with a bonafide adult. Five years ago, I sort of relished in the shock on someone's face [young and old alike] when they realized how much older I was then they figured, but now it's a revelation I dread.
Of course, there's the infuriating reality of folks my age dismissing my worth because they think I'm a highschooler. But mostly, I wish I looked my age, so kids would have a heads-up that the young man they saddled up next to was playing videogames that came out before they were born, someone who remembers the eighties, someone who watched Saved By The Bell in it's original run. I guess I don't want to weird anyone out.
