Quote from: Taka on September 24, 2013, 03:29:27 PM
dysphoria makes the world so monochrome.
Indeed.
It took me until I just simply got so angry with myself for having this same kind of sentiment.
Although I have commented on getting a therapist, taking Low Dose HRT, and other things as if they are easy to do, it is hardly the truth.
Suffering from anything is never pleasant, usually very hard to make it through from one day to the next, at times.
It takes perseverance to achieve most anything, and pulling oneself out of the depression that dysphoria can create is a monumental task.
Not only do you have to deal with the dysphoria, but the effects of depression at the same time.
This is true of the anxiety that can be a result of either or both of those.
Depression and anxiety sounds like one would cancel the other out, but this isn't true.
Neither is getting rid of one or the other going to stop dysphoria.
I have to admit that it feels as if the world is against every move you make while trying to just be normal for whoever you are.
Nothing harder to push against than the whole damn world, when all you want is so little in return.
All I can tell people when they get to the point of thinking about giving up is to consider your flight/fight responses.
I found myself in a corner I never thought I would get out of. I just wanted nothing more than to be left alone, in misery.
But I'm just to damn stubborn to admit defeat without at least taking down a few as I sink into those depths.
There comes a time where people just make it or break it. I chose to do both, being the stubborn scorched earth type of person I can be.
Find the thing that is going to work, take the time to find it, make it your life goal above all else.
If the first one doesn't work, go to the next. And the next.
It doesn't take a strong willed person to fight for what you need to do.
It does take perseverance and keeping your eyes open to new or better possibilities.
Dysphoria is nasty business that can take even nastier solutions to stop.
But once you have a good grip on it, it soon loses it's force, it's stranglehold on your life.
I'm not so much addressing you Taka as I am all of you who talk about this, along with the resulting anxiety and depression.
Dysphoria doesn't come from anxiety and anxiety doesn't come from depression.
Depression is the result of overamping on anxiety and burning out from it.
Dysphoria doesn't need to take you down these paths, as some people have bypassed them completely.
Anxiety doesn't have to lead to being depressed. Dysphoria doesn't have to lead to either of them.
These are separate, but overlapping things that we sometimes let get the best of us.
Taking them one at a time is always the best defense, slamming the crap out of them all at the same time rarely works.
#1 worst thing is depression. Stops you from a lot of things. Get rid of it first.
If it takes meds, so be it. Rarely does anyone ever stay on them for very long.
Once you can tread water on your own, you don't need them. A majority of people are this way.
Anxiety is the same way. Kill it with whatever it takes. Just do what you have to.
Or fall back into depression and start over again.
Dysphoria is nothing more than a kind of state of mind that lends itself to confusion.
Anxiety prone people will become anxious. Depressed kind of people will let it become just that, depression.
But you will need to stop either the confusing thoughts of dysphoria, or stop the results of it.
One way or another.
If talk therapy works, fine, go with it. Nothing like filling up on the side effects of meds to make a person feel worse.
Meds are simply the other side of therapy. Once you have a handle on it, you can manage it.
It took me years of being to damn stubborn to figure this out. It was easy once I got to know the root causes.
Which is what everyone has to figure out for themselves.
You can have a therapist help guide you, but ultimately, you have to do it yourself.
It's the same thing with meds. They only help you to figure it out, never stop it.
Only fools use meds to such an extent that they become over medicated and stay on them forever at high doses.
Some of us have a constant supply, I do. But I don't use them unless I have an informed reason to do so.
In other words, I pay really strict attention to what I'm feeling and what I react to.
Sometimes I'm a basket case of crap that needs a little push to get back to reality. It happens.
Dysphoria is the same way. You deal with it as you need to, regardless of what you need to do.
It doesn't last forever, ever. Once you have control, the rest is just dealing with it as it comes along, if ever again.
Which is the most typical result.
I know a lot of people who don't want to use meds, talk to the right therapist, and I do mean the right therapist.
If the first meds aren't working or seem wrong, they are wrong for you.
Same thing with a therapist.
If you want to know why I know all this, it's because I tried to go for too long without doing anything to fix the problems I had and still have.
I use different meds for different things, only when they are useful, which can be for long stretches.
Those stretches are getting to be less each time.
I see a gender psychologist, because I can, so I do take advantage of it. It's well worth it for the information I get from sessions each month.
I also see a therapist weekly because I can, but I would still see one at least once a month at the least.
I've tried so many different meds, I feel like a walking encyclopedia of side effects and the damage they can do.
I have yet to meet someone who honestly can say they haven't ever felt like crap for one reason or another and at the least thought about help.
It's not a perfect world and it seems to be always getting more complicated each year.
It's hard to trust anything thrown at you, telling you what you need to do to stop whatever is wrong.
And rightfully so. To much money to be made in doing just that.
It's one stupid commercial after another, telling you about wonder cures and drugs and programs and other snake oil cures for what ails you.
It's fine to trust in someone you know you can trust, but ultimately, you have to trust yourself.
The only way to do that is to get to the root of whatever is causing you to experience crap feelings.
It takes looking at yourself in some uncomfortable to even hateful trips down memory lane.
But you only have to do it once. Trust me, you won't forget it that easily that you will need to do it again.
Very simply, do what it takes to get you where you need to be, to get through each and every day.
Sometimes it does seem like it could be a scary or wrong thing to do, to rely on something or someone for help.
But just know that damn near everyone has gone through some rough times at one time or another.
They're still here, living life. The ones who have needed little in the way of help are fortunate to be that way.
For the rest of us usual people, it takes a little more than we are willing to admit to.
And there is the problem. We lie to ourselves about needing a shoulder, a med, a therapist, a friend.
We think we can be stronger because we are always told to be that way. That's a lot of crap.
Life doesn't work like that. Technology has made a lot of gains in helping those who seek help.
Doing so is the best thing you will ever do for yourself.
Living in some kind of dysphoric hell with anxieties and depression is no way to live.
There are people out there, whether in real time or online to help you.
Take advantage of what they have to offer you in finding out who you really can be.
Isn't that why you are here reading this, anyways? To find out who you are?
*Besides finding ways to derail a thread?
Topic derailed, I always wanted to take an entire page to do just that.
Because I can.
Ativan.
