Came out to the head boss

[jillian]

I told him I am transexual and that there would be significant changes taking place in terms of my appearance.
He said "So"

Then he said, dont get the company in trouble...

In Nevada I am protected.
They cannt discriminate against me
I can use the womans restroom and if they ask me for id or proof that I am female, it is harrasment.

If I am demoted, passed up for promotions or anything due to my gender identity, it is a violation of my rights in Nevada

Currently I am their top performer.

I am scared.

On top of everything, our customers are billion dollar corporations up and down the Vegas strip.

I am a little overwhelmed.

As of now I use the mens room even though I look and feel out of place.

I go by my assigned name at work, but that is going to start changing.


On top of everything I am dealing with severe mood swings.
I go from overwhelming feelings of faith and enlightenment,
to dark despair and hopelessness.

I am pushing through

Any advice?

[fuschia]

How accepting of you are the people at your work? Is it a large office, or just a small community of employees? I think one thing that always helps (at least with open-minded people) is taking the time to come out to each person individually. I know I'm coming from a different place here, since my coming out experience was in school, but for me the people who were most supportive are the ones I had a one-on-one conversation with.

[tgirljuliewilson]

Another thing you can do is to remain absolutely and completely professional while at work--make sure everyone is aware that what's happening to you physically is having zero impact on you professionally.  Most of the time, as long as your productivity remains at a high level, most of the coworkers will be fine with the transition, especially if their workload isn't increased due to your being "distracted".  Personal contact, as already suggested, plus confidence and professionalism will go a long way to a successful transition.

Then again, the first time you wear a skirt suit to work (with high heels) will be a day you'll never forget--I sure won't forget mine!!

[Keaira]

Keep in touch with the HR Department. I have no doubt that you will encounter some passive aggressive resistance to your transition. Using the women's bathroom will cause a stir. Trust me! I've been told I was pretty cute when I was male and so polite... Once you switch rest rooms, you'll be seen as Satan incarnate for a while. HR should give you full support in this. Besides, everyone is in their own little stall and everyone pee's. Remember this because you might have to remind people of this biological fact. Also, expect some co-workers to call you by your last name. it's the last act of defiance and one you cant really fight.

I've been fighting this battle for almost as long as I have been on HRT. And on my own. Above all, make sure you have a strong support network. And Good Luck *Hugs*

[~RoadToTrista~]

Yay, I live in the same area. ^.^ Actually I wanted to ask, who's your endo jillian? Is it a guy or a girl?

[lilacwoman]

do what I did.
put a notice on the notice board telling all the staff that following discussion with the boss you have decided the time has come fo ryou to transtion fully to female and wish everyone to see and treat you as one from then on and you would be grateful for help and acceptance for a while.

put the notice on the board midweek and on Monday turn up as a happy Jillian.  by midmorning everyone will be too busy to bother though you may have to learn to enjoy having the guys open the door for you. 

once that is on the board write a letter to all the major customers you know personally and tell them the same and hope you will still have the professional relationship for mutual benefit.

getting out in the open with a complete chageover is I think better than shillyshallying about as a bit this bit that for months.

A place like Vegas will be full of professional businesspeople who are fully aware of what TSism is all about and some may have them working earning money for them in all levels of business.

take a deep breath and do it.

[jillian]

Yay, I live in the same area. ^.^ Actually I wanted to ask, who's your endo jillian? Is it a guy or a girl?

I actually see a biomedical hormone replacement specialist by the name of Dr Christy Thomas. She is very nice, however Ive only been seeing her 3 months. Thurdsay I am going to bring up Provera.  I am curious as to how she will respond to this.

[jillian]

My anxiety is kind of based on the dynamcs of my job.

I do emergency electrical service, and electrical construction. The majority of this is done on build outs in casinos and hospitals.

Our business relies on a good reputation with customers so they choose us, although some of it is a bidding process.
My fear is our exclusion due to the politics that arise from having me on their property.

I am not too concerned with our actual office, as most people are very fond of me, and I am one of the few who gets along with everyone.

However, each individual property is a hurdle, as far as public accommodations are concerned, as well as what I see as an overwhelmingly ,conservative ,republican,  customer base.
Granted these are billion dollar corporations, and most are schooled in EOE, however this could negatively impact our chances of being called to do work on these properties.

The thing is, I have no control over the future, and it is a little frightening.  I know I am extremely skilled, and I have lots of physical and mental acuity as well. I am just not fond of politics, and I know it will be very prevalent in my future.

[lilacwoman]

my local paper did a piece about a MtF who transitined on the job as a telecoms service engineer going round business and said no problems at all.
you may have to give nature a hand for a while with padded bras, makeup and jewellery and the cutest workwear you can find.

[Lexicaligari]

Well, I am going to say Congratulations! Its a very brave thing you have done, legally protected or not! Folks get their legal rights trampled upon all the time, as I am sure you are aware. I had a technical job as well which no one around me could do. I was sort of un fire-able. I still had lots of problem folks around me, but I was VERY lucky. Those ass-hats upset all sorts of persons-- not just me, and karma came due upon their heads. I stayed and they were the first laid off. I would suggest to plan ahead even if things look wonderful now. You sound as if you have a very marketable skill set.

I would keep ahead of the curve as a strategy. I was downsized and found it very hard to find work as a new hire as a result of my transition. Fantastic references, awards, citations, and years of experience didn't help. I went to work for myself and that's what it took. I did not plan ahead. Don't repeat this mistake.

Lexi-

[jillian]

Well, I am going to say Congratulations! Its a very brave thing you have done, legally protected or not! Folks get their legal rights trampled upon all the time, as I am sure you are aware. I had a technical job as well which no one around me could do. I was sort of un fire-able. I still had lots of problem folks around me, but I was VERY lucky. Those ass-hats upset all sorts of persons-- not just me, and karma came due upon their heads. I stayed and they were the first laid off. I would suggest to plan ahead even if things look wonderful now. You sound as if you have a very marketable skill set.

I would keep ahead of the curve as a strategy. I was downsized and found it very hard to find work as a new hire as a result of my transition. Fantastic references, awards, citations, and years of experience didn't help. I went to work for myself and that's what it took. I did not plan ahead. Don't repeat this mistake.

Lexi-

Thanks. I am going back to school.  Today starts day one. I am terrified to say the least.