Haircuts

[fireball49er]

I've always had (and still have), long, shoulder-length hair. I know I want short hair, but I really don't do well with change and the thought really, really scares me. It's really weird, but I'm kind torn between feeling happy at the idea of having short hair and being really terrified at the same time. I always wear it tied back and feel like I'm staring at a different person when it's down, yet I am apparently too cowardly to just get it all chopped off. Now the idea of getting a haircut just makes me stressed out. Social implications are also a bit frightening (I'm not out to anyone yet), but that doesn't bother me nearly as much. And this isn't a minor worry, it's really freaking me out.

I'm very confused. Any ideas/advice/tips? Thanks!

[Zerro]

I think one thing that helped when I cut my shoulder length hair off was that, hey, if I was unhappy with it, it could always grow back out. For the most part, hair is a pretty adaptable thing and can grow back out. I actually ended up liking the change, to be honest! It felt different to not have so much hair, but in a good way. There was less to care for, after all! And while I sometimes miss my long hair, I remember that if I ever want it back, all I have to do it stop trimming my hair. :p

Dig around for a good person to cut your hair off, someone that will LISTEN to what you want. I had a friend who just graduated from cosmetology school cut mine, and we had fun. I only spent like $10 USD on it, and we ended up hanging out after and I got a lot of compliments from people. Granted, I'm out to most folks, but still. Short hair isn't always seen as a bad thing on "girls". Look at actress Emma Watson, she looks pretty spiffy with short hair and while you always get people who complain, a lot of people think she looks good.

Anyway, it's your hair! Only cut it if you want to, okay? It's okay to be nervous, change is pretty weird after all. But not all change is bad change in the end!

[Minhuit]

I just shaved my head into a fauxhawk the day before thanksgiving. It was mid-back length. I'm not out to anyone yet either but I had been thinking about cutting it off forever. The stylist asked me about 5 times before she actually cut off my pony tail and then shaved it lol. Just like Zerro said, cutting off the hair is sooo liberating!! There is less to deal with and to wash. I don't have really have to fight the tangles anymore or even brush it for that matter! It is also so much cooler during the warmer part of the day.

Anyway, girl just cut your hair when you are ready for it. You are not being forced into anything so don't feel like you have to do it. If you like your long hair then keep it! There are guys out there with long hair, but it will be a little harder for you to pass if you have a girly face. Just remember: the only thing that matters is what you think. People have opinions and they can keep it.

[Darth_Taco]

You could always use my excuse, donate the hair. I had ridiculously long hair (like 3 feet long), and had it all cut at once. Donated that mess to Locks of Love xD. So that way when people ask (if I'm not out to them), I just tell them that I felt like doing something charitable. Most people will just think of you as a good person :'P. Besides, you'd be doing a good thing for someone out there that really needs it :'D. You might need to grow it out a little more though, you need to have at least 10 inches of hair to donate. I personally thought it was well worth it. Whenever I miss my long hair, I just think of that child out there that now has it.

[Sharky]

A lot of guys have long hair. If you want to keep it for now, keep it. If you want short hair gradually trim it shorter.

[he who shall not be named]

I used to have hair that fell down to the middle of my back. I got rid of it by getting haircuts that were gradually shorter, but tbh I should have just chopped it all off. It's such a relief to have short hair now, I love it.  I let people convince me that slow was the ONLY way to go, but really I should have done what I wanted in the first place.  'sall good now, though.

Anyway, if the idea of suddenly having short hair really scares you, you can always cut it slowly. Or not. I like the excuse of donating everything to locks of love, it's clever.

Try not to agonize about it too much. I do that and always manage to psych myself out about everything. Haircuts aren't tattoos, nothing is permanent. Go ahead and do it if you know you want short hair -- you probably won't regret it, but if you do it'll always grow back.

[Devin87]

You could always use my excuse, donate the hair. I had ridiculously long hair (like 3 feet long), and had it all cut at once. Donated that mess to Locks of Love xD. So that way when people ask (if I'm not out to them), I just tell them that I felt like doing something charitable. Most people will just think of you as a good person :'P. Besides, you'd be doing a good thing for someone out there that really needs it :'D. You might need to grow it out a little more though, you need to have at least 10 inches of hair to donate. I personally thought it was well worth it. Whenever I miss my long hair, I just think of that child out there that now has it.

I took that even further.  I did St. Baldrick's Foundation, which is where you get people to sponsor you to shave your head in support of childhood cancer research.  I did it with the school I teach at (a Catholic school) and not only was it a great way to get the Catholic school to support a female teacher shaving her head, we also raised over $500 for childhood cancer research.  So I got an excuse to try a whole lot of male haircuts while it was growing out, and I also got to help people and got a very valid reason for why I did it for people who don't know I'm trans (which is most people).  It also got me over the fear of short hair pretty darn quick.  Right now my hair's just a little shaggy and I feel like it's getting too long.

[anibioman]

i was afraid to i was a freshman in high school and very self conscious. i shaved my head for a charity called saint baldricks.

[Darth_Taco]

I took that even further.  I did St. Baldrick's Foundation, which is where you get people to sponsor you to shave your head in support of childhood cancer research.  I did it with the school I teach at (a Catholic school) and not only was it a great way to get the Catholic school to support a female teacher shaving her head, we also raised over $500 for childhood cancer research.  So I got an excuse to try a whole lot of male haircuts while it was growing out, and I also got to help people and got a very valid reason for why I did it for people who don't know I'm trans (which is most people).  It also got me over the fear of short hair pretty darn quick.  Right now my hair's just a little shaggy and I feel like it's getting too long.

That sounds so awesome! D: I couldn't do that though, my skull is somewhat misshapen xD. I was dropped on my head more than once as a child and I still have a soft spot on my head ;_;. Maybe when I have money I can sponsor someone though...

[Felix]

I had really long hair and I donated most of it to Locks of Love. I was out but not transitioned, but it wouldn't matter what stage you were at. Charity is a great motivator and people tend not to criticize you for it.

[rosetyler]

A lot of guys have long hair. If you want to keep it for now, keep it.

What he said.  There's lots of guys out there who can rock long hair andor a ponytail quite nicely. 

[JohnAlex]

I just slowly cut my hair shorter and shorter.

I used to have hair down to the middle of my back.  and when I was younger, I always told my parents that I wanted short hair, but they wouldn't let me cut it.  then after I moved out, I cut it shoulder length and it looked even more girly, I didn't like it.  And so I would tell people, "I don't like it, I'm thinking about cutting it shorter."  Then I cut it to just below my ears, it was kinda more like a bob hair cut.  And then eventually I had a "boys" hair cut, but it was shaggy and not very short.  And then I had a short boy's hair cut like I liked it.    And this whole time I was not out to anyone.  So I don't think people were shocked by any change, since it wasn't sudden.  and I had given them a heads up by letting them know I was thinking about cutting it shorter.