Gender Identity taught in schools

[insideontheoutside]

I recently read some articles about how some schools in California have started "teaching" gender identity.

The first article I read was actually about another teacher (sorry, can't find the link again) who noticed a girl in her class was different from the others. She took it upon herself to try to understand why the girl was so distraught one day and basically found out that she just didn't feel comfortable acting or looking like a girl. The teacher got with the parents and the parents were already well aware of it and completely accepting that they did not have a girly-girl on their hands so the teacher asked the kid if she would prefer she referred to her with male pronouns if that would make her more comfortable. She actually said no, that referring to her in female terms was fine. But I respected the teacher for dealing with the issue privately with the child and then getting with the parents. By the way, I think it was elementary school level.

Now the second article I just read was concerning a school in Oakland, CA and the teacher bringing gender identity into the classroom of elementary school kids. The article was most certainly written from a conservative viewpoint because the gist of the tone of the article was that such a thing was completely wrong and that boys should be boys and girls should be girls and filling their young, impressionable minds with something like this was wrong and would only lead to more transgendered people and more problems. I did come across several other articles of the opposite view point, citing that introducing kids to this concept might make them more tolerant when exposed to this later and if there was any kid that wasn't fitting the binary mold that they might feel more comfortable.

Having read both viewpoints and of course having been a child in elementary school myself who did not fit the gender binary, I of course have a whole world of opinions on this. And that's one of the things that posting on message boards is all about, right? Opinions.

First of all, I honestly believe that the statics for gender variation as a whole would certainly be larger than actual transsexualism. I know I've read trans stats in the past and the numbers were not that high at all. It's very similar to being intersex - you're certainly not in the majority. And in our society, majority rules and that rule is that there are males and there are females. So most of our whole society is set up like that. Granted, society has shown some spark of social evolutionary thought in that women don't have to just be baby machines and housewives any more and men can actually own hair product and take up hobbies like knitting. However, there is still bias out there.

That said, I read another recent article that school is actually one of the major places where children develop their gender identity and learn about the binary social world and specific male and female roles in it. I tend to believe this. I know when I was a kid in school I was most certainly considered weird, made fun of for wearing boys clothes, was dealt with differently by teachers ... it's not like young kids can't pick up on the fact they're different. But, I also have to break down and agree with the conservative view point that impressionable child minds will interpret, "gender identity teaching" very differently from even a teenager would and most certainly an adult. If you've made it to teenager and someone introduces the concept to you, it might even be easier to understand or in the small percentage of people it effects it might turn on some light bulbs. I feel that introducing this topic too early (they were talking like kindergarten through 4th grade) might actually not allow some kids to develop their own identity naturally.

I am, however a big proponent of children who do show gender variance to not be publicly singled out, but to be allowed to just be themselves. And I think teachers should be aware of it and children certainly shouldn't be criticized or made to conform to a specific mold. But it would be good for someone to then talk to that child and explain to them that they're not weird or a freak and that they are in fact normal and acceptable.

As a side note, I also think that it's a lot easier for a girl to be a "tom boy" that it is for a boy to act like a girl. I'm not sure why that's socially more acceptable but it just is. Which is wacky, but it certainly can be somewhat of a benefit to boys who are actually stuck in a girl's body.

Thoughts?

[Felix]

I think this is a commentary on the second article you mentioned:
http://bluecollarphilosophy.com/2011/05/oakland-elementary-school-uses-gay-activist-group-to-sow-gender-confusion-among-kindergartners/

[lexical]

As a side note, I also think that it's a lot easier for a girl to be a "tom boy" that it is for a boy to act like a girl. I'm not sure why that's socially more acceptable but it just is. Which is wacky, but it certainly can be somewhat of a benefit to boys who are actually stuck in a girl's body.

Thoughts?

I agree... gender role transgression among males is so much more taboo than among females (at least here in the states). It's sort of like the double standard between lesbians and gay men, how there is much more cultural tolerance for women being into women. I think male privilege has something to do with it, in the sense that it is hard for many individuals [i.e. cis men] to grasp a male's rejection of that privilege to become female and/or more traditionally feminine. Thinking about how men have been known to put each other down by referring to other men in female terms -- to not only be willing but actively wanting to be feminine may be too odd to some I guess.

[malinkibear]

I reblogged that first one the other day, here's the original if anyone's interested:
http://togetherforjacksoncountykids.tumblr.com/post/14314184651/one-teachers-approach-to-preventing-gender-bullying-in

[Natkat]

I dont like gender teaching in school. I donno how yours experience have been

at my first school, gender where topic who hit since you where small,
there where very few girls compared to the guys, so it where complitely normal for girls to have guy friends and so,
on the other hand there where also alot of clubs and activetis who where made because the teachers thought the girls should hang out with other girls as well.. I bet they sorta felt sorry for them.

I had been in alot of those, the first years you where forced to join, and it where only alowed for girls, later on it got less strick, and my last year you could join if you wanted, and even guys got the change if they wanted to join as well, (but usunally they didnt because they thought it where too girly) I had a pretty fine time the last year because I could be there as I wanted, I where more like a worker, since I put on the girls make up, and made there hair, without getting to touch it myself.
-------
the other years was worse.. I only fitted when it where something gender neutral, but I didnt like to think of it as "girl things" more like something you did with alot of girls.. and I hate if anyone mention it.
--
as we hit puberty it where worse because we cut the activeties, into serious talking about, guys, marrige, children and so, which I hated so much.
in general I cut some of the sexual education because I where scared of being bullied or looked on as being a girl.

in grade 8-10 we had about gender in social, and I hate that. it where about how guys generally where fighting and playing with cars, while girl where playing with dolls, compared to the fact I knew I where trans and bullied about it, I thought it where bull->-bleeped-<-, and I thought those prejugings made the world worse for people.
---
now when I grew up we I notice we actually had a few transgender people on my school beside me, but I newer found out before I turned older. those people where also having a pretty hard time. while thinking back I kinda notice I where the only one who dared to come out, but on the other hand I also had alot of troubles with that, got scolded for being so naughty to "do what girls wasnt allowed to do"
like one of the guys from my school once showed up in a dress, and the next day he said he where no longer allowed to do so.

=(

[ozoozol]

Meh ... they're going to be teaching gender identity regardless. 

Boys act this way.  Girls act that way.  You are this.  She is that.  They are the same.  You are different. 

That is "teaching gender identity."  It sounds like what people are having problems with is, literally, the not-teaching of gender identity.

[Devin87]

I'm a 2nd grade teacher and we actually have a story in our reading book about girls and boys who were friends and decided to split up to do "girl things" and "boys things" and the boys club was all snakes and games and running around wild and at the girls club they had tea parties and did arts and crafts and stuff.  In the end the girls are completely bored at the girls club and the boys are completely bored at the boys club, so they get back together and form a club for everyone where people can do whatever they want.

I usually use that story to ask them who likes what and they see lots of boys like "girl things" and lots of girls like "boy things" and in the end we conclude that there aren't really boy things and girl things and everyone can like whatever they want.  I'm not sure how much the integrate the lesson into their greater worldview, but at least they've been introduced to the idea.

[Natkat]

Ozoozol;

if gender identety where to be in the school subjects then it should be done right,
sadly I havent seen that being done anywhere.

I would also hate if children where taught math in school but all the math they where learned where wrong results.

[Tossu-sama]

Back in elementary school, our class got pretty much gender-divided in crafts lessons where boys took the wood works and girls sewing. Of course, it wasn't prohibited for boys to go to sew and vice versa but peer pressure is an interesting thing. That's why ended up messing with sewing machines (needless to say, I pretty much sucked at it). I would've wanted to go to wood works but yeah. I didn't want to be alone.

It was also in elementary school when we had some form of sex education for girls and boys separately (we were like... 11 or 12). It continued all the way to lower secondary school.

I just remember that even in upper secondary school, we had awfully little about sexual minorities, not to talk about gender minorities. If I'm not completely mistaken, the teacher(s) never even said a word about trans people etc. Now that I think about it, it's pretty weird. Doesn't really help with my age group and younger people's negative attitudes about people who aren't exactly part of what I could call mainstream.
And it certainly doesn't help those who are confused about themselves. They gotta look for the information themselves from the internet or whatever.

[Natkat]

I just remember that even in upper secondary school, we had awfully little about sexual minorities, not to talk about gender minorities. If I'm not completely mistaken, the teacher(s) never even said a word about trans people etc. Now that I think about it, it's pretty weird. Doesn't really help with my age group and younger people's negative attitudes about people who aren't exactly part of what I could call mainstream.
And it certainly doesn't help those who are confused about themselves. They gotta look for the information themselves from the internet or whatever.

I think its a pretty wellknowed problem that school are focusing too little on those topics,
those educations are only if your straight and fit in..

[Caisie Breen]

I think everything stated by "insideontheoutside", was spot on and very well said at that! Don't single these children out but be professionaly prepared to council them if they are showing signs of depression, or doing something else totally out of their character.