Height/Size Dysphoria is Getting to me Again

[schism]

Vegeta from DBZ was 5'3.  Yeah it came from an anime show but he's still bad-a reguardless.

lmao brilliant.  vegeta is the man.

[slytherin]

I tried getting over it but yesterday it was all I can think about. I am trying to accept my 5'4 height with a lot of difficulties. I don't want limb lengthening, the idea of that scares me too much. Though at one point I was so depressed I didn't care if it did scare me. I am still looking at HGH hormones but just feeling like nothing but a slap in the face after I'm always told they won't do anything for me because I'm done growing already. Now I'm looking at elevator shoes but my only concern with these are taking the shoes off when at a friend's house or family's house and everyone will definitely notice I'm not that tall. I suppose there's nothing I can do about that?   Also I was thinking if I work out and get really bulky will that at least make me appear taller? Seriously it just keeps bringing down my confidence no matter how hard I try not to think about it

Try being 5'1 haha! I know lots of small guys though so don't let it get to you. I have a cis-male friend who's an inch or two shorter than me. I feel insecure about my height too and I used to consider limb lenghtening and be really down about my height but I notice a lot of men in public my height/only a inch or two taller than me so I'm really not bothered anymore. My great grandad was only 5'2 and that wasn't due to ageing, he was that height almost his whole life.

But putting on a bit of muscle will help you. In my opinion all the elevator shoes look super ugly, you could try these shoe inserts that make you taller by about an inch though, you can get them quite cheap on ebay or amazon.

[Devin87]

I'm short for a guy, but still close at 5'7''.  I'm the same height as my father, though, so I feel better knowing that.  In fact, thinking about my father always makes me feel better.  He's the same height as me, he has a round face with chubby cheeks like me, and my arms are almost as hairy as his.  By myself sometimes I feel like those qualities (besides the arms) make me more female, but when I think about my dad they just make me feel like his biological son.  Whenever I'm with him I feel like I pass even more than normal because I just look so much like him.

[dalebert]

Lots of cis-guys have height disphoria too, fwiw. I still say that I (5'7) would take the tall pills if they had such a thing with no substantial side effects until I was 6'4, but I'm super greedy. That said, I have grown to appreciate a number of things about not being particularly tall.

Shorter people tend to live substantially longer on average. May have something to do with getting more mileage out of a heart that doesn't have to fight gravity quite as hard.
It's way easier to find clothes that fit.
It's easier to get comfortable on most furniture.
It's easier to get into smaller spaces.
Seems to help in a number of sports like gymnastics, bodybuilding, and soccer. You literally do not fall over as easily when you have a lower center of gravity!
Tend to appear younger than we actually are for a good chunk of our lives.

Those are just a few off the top of my head. I'd love to hear more.

Also, I'd personally say that bulking up (in an exaggerated manner) might emphasise your height but that's just my opinion.

I think that's a very real possible downside. On the other hand, I've also heard from folks into body-building that shorter guys have better symmetry (??). I've also heard that from my ex who had a preference for shorter guys. I think there may be something to that because one thing I've always noticed is that shorter guys look better naked than taller guys. Something about really tall guys is they can look kind of stretched out like taffy and disproportionate. I guess it depends on the extent to which they had a rapid and ungainly growth spurt.

Mind you, I still like tall guys too. The fact is that there are advantages and disadvantages to both. I still find myself a little fascinated by and initially attracted to tall guys, perhaps because I'm not very tall myself and there is a little bit of the psychology of being attracted to that which you're lacking. However, my tastes have broadened out quite a bit as I've gotten older and I'm now almost just a fascinated by and attracted to guys that are smallish compared to me. I find that brings out my more dominant tendencies whereas tall guys tend to trigger my more submissive tendencies, and frequently that's not a good thing. Turns out height and tendencies for dominant or submissive behavior are not as correlated as many seem to think. BTW, I'm not just referring to sex, but... yeah, that too.

[anibioman]

my cismale younger brother is 5'4" he isnt growing anymore either so dont to feel bad. also something that can help is puberty blockers especially if your under 18 because your limbs can grow more if you block your bodies production of hormones because at the end of puberty your bones fuse to your growth plates and cant grow lengthwise anymore.

[Cody Jensen]

I am 19 so sadly I don't think hgh will work on me. Thanks for the support everyone and I am excited to get that muscle on me.

[elabis]

I tried getting over it but yesterday it was all I can think about. I am trying to accept my 5'4 height with a lot of difficulties. I don't want limb lengthening, the idea of that scares me too much. Though at one point I was so depressed I didn't care if it did scare me. I am still looking at HGH hormones but just feeling like nothing but a slap in the face after I'm always told they won't do anything for me because I'm done growing already. Now I'm looking at elevator shoes but my only concern with these are taking the shoes off when at a friend's house or family's house and everyone will definitely notice I'm not that tall. I suppose there's nothing I can do about that?   Also I was thinking if I work out and get really bulky will that at least make me appear taller? Seriously it just keeps bringing down my confidence no matter how hard I try not to think about it

god I wish I was 5'4". I'm MtF.
Unofrtunately my height is 6'3" and I feel very depressed about it... it's what's stopping me from transitioning. I wish we could switch our bodies somehow...brain transplant maybe?

[aleon515]

I use humor. But I can't say I am not bothered by it being 5'1". I am shorter than most women. I tell people I am vertically challenged.

--Jay

[Jack_M]

Also I was thinking if I work out and get really bulky will that at least make me appear taller?

In a sense, yeah it will.  Not so much physically, obviously, but like others have said, more indirectly with regards to how you feel about yourself changing how you carry and project who you are and all that counts for a lot.  I may be slightly better off at 5'8", but whenever I've jokingly called myself the short dude around friends or work, people are quick to stand next to me and only then are they like, "Oh yeah!  You are a small fry aren't ya?!" in a jokey way.  Sometimes even I don't realise how short I am until they do that, and 2 of my coworkers are actually shorter than me - score!  My brother is 6'4" and honestly, until I see pics of the two of us I never think there's that much of a height difference when we're together.  So confidence and how you hold yourself can work wonders.

Malachite's MMA fighter mentality example is a great way to look at it.  If you ever look at MMA stats for lower weight divisions, there's plenty amazing fighters around 5'5" give or take.  I saw this picture lately of Urijah Faber (5'6") and Shaq:



He posts tons of pics on Twitter and when he's in the gym he just looks like a regular size guy around people either his height or slightly taller or smaller.  Pics taken more in the outside word is when you notice that he's shorter than many others.  But here he is all smiles next to Shaq joking about being small.

And here's Charlie Valencia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Valencia.  That dude is 5'3" and fought in the WEC and a UFC fight.

As much as it may seem like an over compensating thing, I can speak highly of the confidence I've gained from martial arts experience.  If you're in any way interested in things like that, I'd recommend doing a martial art of some kind.  I'd never start a physical fight, ever, but just knowing if something went down that I have the confidence and training to have a shot in a fight, even if outmatched size wise, it's helped with my confidence and how I hold myself.  Also, another thing that helps there is that you can gain the confidence without having to super bulk up.  In martial arts speed tends to trump mass so most martial artists tend to be toned more than buff.  Sometimes being too bulky can go the opposite way for shorter guys and make them look a little short and stalky, accentuating a smaller head for example.  But toned with a confidence to hold yourself high can go a long way.  So I wouldn't say you have to do a major amount of work tbh.

I'd have a 2 inch height advantage on Urijah Faber, and yet I'd bet I'd feel 4 feet tall against a guy like that in a match!

[Cindy]

Sorry if this is out of place, and even unhelpful. As a MtF I know what physical dysphoria means.

As a woman I would date a guy no matter what his height or build was. It is his personality, his 'manliness', his respect for me, his love of life, his joy of life and his demeanor.

A six foot jerk is a six foot of jerk. A 5 foot man who knows how to be a man is awesome.

Being a man is nothing to do with physical size. Many of the most important men in history were vertically challenged.

But they were men.

They demanded respect. Not because of their body shape, but because of their manliness, their confidence, humour, their talk, their ---being a man.

I and I would suggest most women, would be proud to walk hand in hand with a physically small man than we would be with a large guy who was so self centered on their maleness than their concern for me.

Sorry but I'm just a woman who likes men.

There are not many around. There are lots of jerks though!!

Cindy

[Brandon]

Even though I'm 5'4 my height does bother me alot I really wish I was average, Girls really don't like short guys either, unless their shorter than,  Especially with the Cis girls who are taller than me

[AdamMLP]

Even though I'm 5'4 my height does bother me alot I really wish I was average, Girls really don't like short guys either, unless their shorter than,  Especially with the Cis girls who are taller than me

I'm 5'1", and at a guess my girlfriend is 5'6".  I'm noticeably shorter than her anyway.  It doesn't bother her at all.  If a girl is willing to discount someone as a potential partner just because of their height then you could probably do better than them anyway.

A lot of women, particularly girls, joke about it, because it's not their ideal idea of someone who is attractive, but in reality when it comes down to loving someone minor things like height doesn't matter any more.

[Brandon]

I'm 5'1", and at a guess my girlfriend is 5'6".  I'm noticeably shorter than her anyway.  It doesn't bother her at all.  If a girl is willing to discount someone as a potential partner just because of their height then you could probably do better than them anyway.

A lot of women, particularly girls, joke about it, because it's not their ideal idea of someone who is attractive, but in reality when it comes down to loving someone minor things like height doesn't matter any more.

Yea but its unattractive in my oppinion for a woman to be taller than a man, I find women who are taller than me intimidating, Unless its like in inch or so but I don't think I could date a woman who's taller than me not to be rude

[aleon515]

Yea but its unattractive in my oppinion for a woman to be taller than a man, I find women who are taller than me intimidating, Unless its like in inch or so but I don't think I could date a woman who's taller than me not to be rude

You are awfully young to have all these opinions about things that seem, I hate to say this buddy, old-fashioned and restrictive. I thought we got rid of all those attitudes back in the 60s or something. I'm glad I don't have to live to your rules. The times they are a-changin'. Bob Dylan 1964.


--Jay

[Brandon]

You are awfully young to have all these opinions about things that seem, I hate to say this buddy, old-fashioned and restrictive. I thought we got rid of all those attitudes back in the 60s or something. I'm glad I don't have to live to your rules. The times they are a-changin'. Bob Dylan 1964.


--Jay

Yea... Not that young If you look at how fast time is going Ill be an adult here soon, What's wrong with my oppinion, I just don't wanna date a woman whoes taller than me call me shallow or whatever you want

[King Malachite]

Yea... Not that young If you look at how fast time is going Ill be an adult here soon, What's wrong with my oppinion, I just don't wanna date a woman whoes taller than me call me shallow or whatever you want

To be honest I don't think it's shallow at all.  Nothing is wrong with your opinion.  Some people are attracted to certain physical traits.    Personally, I would feel intimidated too if I dated a woman that was taller than me....initially.  However, if I fell in love with a woman that was taller than me, I wouldn't write her off because of that.  I'd try work through my insecurities and if the lady is worth it, she wouldn't think any less of me.

When we die, most of us will be near the same height laying on our backs or cremated anyways.

[Brandon]

To be honest I don't think it's shallow at all.  Personally, I would feel intimidated too if I dated a woman that was taller than me....initially.  However, if I fell in love with a woman that was taller than me, I wouldn't write her off because of that.  I'd try work through my insecurities and of the lady is worth it, she wouldn't think any less of me.

When we die, most of us will be near the same height laying on our backs or cremated anyways.

Thank You it was't to offend anyone

[NathanielM]

Yea... Not that young If you look at how fast time is going Ill be an adult here soon, What's wrong with my oppinion, I just don't wanna date a woman whoes taller than me call me shallow or whatever you want

I don't think this is shallow either, it's basic attraction. If she happens to be a girl that's perfect for you in any other way you might still go for her though :p Nah, we can be attracted to whatever we are attracted too.
Personally I don't really have a problem with my height (5'5'' i think 1.67 metres) I'm not tiny but I'm not average for a guy either. My not caring might have to do with the fact that i find height differences attractive Otherwise I know plenty of girls that like the cute short guy type so ... Also what I do have is that I notice other (cis)guys height and I've noticed a lot of attractive guys that happen to be shorter or my size. I think you can make up for your size with charisma too, you seem taller if you stand tall

[Brandon]

I don't think this is shallow either, it's basic attraction. If she happens to be a girl that's perfect for you in any other way you might still go for her though :p Nah, we can be attracted to whatever we are attracted too.
Personally I don't really have a problem with my height (5'5'' i think 1.67 metres) I'm not tiny but I'm not average for a guy either. My not caring might have to do with the fact that i find height differences attractive Otherwise I know plenty of girls that like the cute short guy type so ... Also what I do have is that I notice other (cis)guys height and I've noticed a lot of attractive guys that happen to be shorter or my size. I think you can make up for your size with charisma too, you seem taller if you stand tall

That'ts true that's why I also always try to hold my head up when walking while standing tall

[NathanielM]

Another think that helps me is that I'm the same size as Harry Potter! Who's gonna tell me that's too short