faking pregnancy 0_0

[Elsa.G]

i have a trans friend named Patricia, she is 29 yrs old and she has been on hormones for 5 yrs. She is a really sweet girl and i like to hang out with her alot because she's fun. Recently though she has been doing something which i find a bit odd and which makes me wanna hang out with her less. She walks around with a "baby bump" under her shirts and she also buys and uses maternity clothing when doing that. Now to be brutally honest she is not 100% passable so i think sometimes people clock her and find what she is doing, kinda disturbing. Do you think this is a way of over doing things?

[Maegan]

It is a bit odd. You should really ask her why.

[Rabbit]

Yea, something mental seems to be going on with her.... if my friend was doing that, I would definitely stop hanging around with her also.

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Elsa,
In all seriousness, I personally feel it's time to visit the therapist. I'm inclined to think this is another form of denial, manifesting itself in a form of uncontrollable desire. If it continues without professional attention, it  could lead to further 'unacceptble' behaviour, with regrettable consequences.

Not understanding what your term "fun" means; if it's excessive and consistant, it may be a smoke screen for other issues. I may be going totally over board and be 1000% completely wrong on all counts. However from what you've said and the reaction from others' comments, my alarm bells are starting to ring.

After 5 years of HRT, does she have any plans for further transition? Is she becoming withdrawn? Are other friends dropping off? Is she saying or carrying out any other irrational behaviour? If there is a "Yes" to any of those questions, apart from transition plans, then yes; medical intervention is a necessity in order to maintain a healthy well 'balanced' transitioning lifestyle.

It may be something very simple, and she just wants to make a statement, It can also be an indicator of something deeper.

You are currently in a very good position to guide her towards a healthy outcome. Do your best not to alarm anyone over it. Just be supportive of helping her find a professional solution. Keep all your local emergency numbers at hand, (police, ambulance, suicide help line, emergency mental health) ready for immediate use, and contact her on a daily basis over the phone to ensure her safety and so you can determine whether her condition is deteriorating at all.

Just stick with her. You never know when you may need, her.

Keep in touch and let us know how you are coping.

Be safe, well and happy
Lotsa huggs
Catherine

[JenJen2011]

Poor girl. I feel her pain.

[Annah]

I think she needs to see a doctor. I find that very disturbing she would do that.

The issue that she doesn't pass and she does it where people know the pregnancy is fake is even more disturbing. It certainly doesn't portray a good image for trans.

I would confront her and encourage her to a therapist. If she thinks you are over reacting, show her this thread.

[Skyanne]

That's not right and very dishonest, the fact that she's trans doesn't have any bearing, a ciswoman shouldn't do it either.

[Sarah Louise]

Some people say we are wrong and dishonest for believing we are women/men, so lets be careful throwing those terms around.  You need to find out why this person is doing this.

It certainly could draw attention to them, maybe even unwanted attention.  If she just wants to experience the feeling of being pregnant that wouldn't be so wrong or strange.  I know I would have loved to be pregnant.  Would I go out one day with a baby bump and another day without it, probably not.

Would I want to be with her on a day she was doing this, would be hard to say, I guess it would depend on how long I had known her and how she presented herself.

[JenJen2011]

I don't see it as a big deal.

[pebbles]

Okay... No matter what way I look at that it's a strange thing to do.

[lilacwoman]

actually last year in the library I had to squeeze past a woman with a pram and glanced at the baby only to see it was a fake baby - all red and squashed face like a new born - so not very 'passable'.

I mentioned it to my boss and she said it was weird but when my other boss came in she said that she had worked 18 years on maternity/premature baby ward and some women who lose a baby very late or during birth do get some comfort from being given one of these dolls.

I also have some friends who are AIS etc and post-op and they get really upset at being unable to have babies so it is just possible this Patricia has deeper gender issues or is perhaps soemwhere on the AIS scale.

[veritatemfurto]

There's a difference between realizing reality and continuing to act.

not every cis woman that is pregnant acts like they are pregnant.

wearing maternity clothing isn't too bad, some fat people do it

Who wouldn't be depressed at the thought that they can't have their own children without some serious medical intervention that doesn't yet exist? I may cry about it, but I don't go around pretending its not true.

[Jamie D]

The "not 100% passable" transwoman wearing a "baby bump" prosthesis serves two purposes.  First, it make her feel whole, and hence more feminine.  Second, it help her "pass" better as a female, as pregnancy is visually associated with females, regardless of their other physical features.

[lilacwoman]

but still, this is why therapy should be and still is a big part of everyone's transition.
[/quote]


should be?  thank goodness here in Europe it is now illegal to insist on TS submitting to therapy

[Gretchen]

If I was friends with her I would ask her what her reasoning is behind this bizare behaviour. If your friends you can surely talk about it?

[Felix]

Be gentle with her. What she's doing serves some purpose for her, or she wouldn't be doing it. It is bizarre. She may not realize how strange it looks. Or she may just be hurting and maladapting to an unfortunate circumstance. Obviously look out for yourself first, but this girl sounds like your friendship would do her good.

[caseyyy]

I like what Felix said. And i don't see why it's a major concern, despite it bordering on slightly creepy. I mean, if she was using it as an excuse to be rude ("hormones") or expecting people to wait on her hand and foot then it'd be an issue for me.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Maybe she just thinks it makes her pass, lol

[V M]

There are trans women who have the desire to bare children, that is fairly common    It is also fairly common for children to pretend to be pregnant

However, I also feel it to be rather odd behavior of someone her age to be publicly acting out in such a manor    I also agree that it would be best to try to talk to her gently as a caring friend and possibly help her to seek professional help

She seems to have a rather deep rooted strong desire to be pregnant and she needs a good friend and possibly therapy imo

V M

[Jayr]

I don't see it as a big deal.

This.

People might think she's even more cray cray though.
But hey, if she's doing fine in life, and doesn't care what people think.
Go for it.

My friends always thought I was prego in high school because I ate crazy mixes of stuff.
Thank god I was never xD