Trans 'Fad'?

[Apollo]

Part of the reasons I'm so terrified of taking the next step into understanding myself, is because of the sort of 'fad' being trans seems to be becoming. I don't know if any of you guys are on Tumblr, but the community there seems really into claiming they're trans. Not saying many of them aren't really, but the fact that it's to a point that where if you aren't trans, you actually are susceptible to hate.

This may all sound really stupid or ignorant, but when you see people who (at least, as far as you know) were totally fine with their gender before suddenly deciding to be male-- it kind of gets to you. You know, the ones who 'chose' to be trans, or ask you to call them by male pronouns but yet flounces around their female body with no issue?

I'm not sure if I'm just very narrow minded with it all, or what. But it all feels really fake to me, and makes me extremely nervous to talk to my friends about my issues because I just recently got the courage to confront them (I grew up very sheltered, and was actually pretty unaware of the idea of the possibility of transitioning until my later years of high school, and by that point, I was so used to living as a female, it's all kind of surreal to me that there was a solution)... and I'm terrified of people accusing me of just doing this because I want to seem 'cool' or what not, like I've seen people do. Especially since I wouldn't really be the conventional male, enjoying still a numerous amount of tasks that are seen as feminine (sewing, fashion, make-up (not necessarily for me, I like doing others)).

I really do feel as if I'm being stupid or rude with saying all this... but I'm mainly wondering, am I the only one who sees this? Did any of you have these sorts of fears with coming to terms with yourselves?

[wheat thins are delicious]

You know, the ones who 'chose' to be trans, or ask you to call them by male pronouns but yet flounces around their female body with no issue?

What do you mean by this part?

[Apollo]

What do you mean by this part?

I guess this may be me being a jerk, just-- this was only something that kind of got to me the other night, when I saw someone I follow (who identifies as male/trans) basically flashing everyone their breasts and everything. I guess dysphoria hits everyone differently, I can be rather comfortable with my own breasts in the presence of people I know, but posting it on a public site where I try to at the very least present myself as androgynously as possible?

I dunno, it really just rubbed me wrong.

Whenever I see things like that, I start feeling really nervous and questioning everything about myself. I guess this thread is kinda me asking, is this sort of stuff at least normal? Am I just over-thinking or something? Yeah..

[wheat thins are delicious]

Some people are more comfortable than others with the body they were given.  I myself am comfortable being unbound in my home, but only around my mom, dad, brother, sister, and brother's bff, if anyone else comes over I put on a binder and when I leave the house I always wear a binder.  Some guys I know won't even take their binder off in front of their girlfriend.

[Henri]

What I think is important is to only concern yourself with how you feel. These people on other sites have nothing to do with your identity. If you know this is how you feel and what will make you comfortable living in your own skin, then that is what matters. You don't know what these people on Tumblr are feeling, or how they identify. You can't possibly know that. It doesn't matter whether or not they actually identify as trans, or how comfortable they are with their bodies. They are the only people that have to worry about that. Just because someone is more comfortable with their body as it is does not make them any "less trans", and it does nt invalidate your identity.

[Squirrel698]

+1 to Henri

Although I do understand the OP's prospective.  I have a friend who transitioned for a bit and then de-transitioned for some silly reason.  That's her own deal of course but I felt a bit like it devalidated my own experience it others eyes.  They looked at her and asked me just why I was putting myself through so much when clearly it's easy to de-transition and just be a girly boy.  NO THO

The thing is with so few examples out in the world of exactly what a FTM is, when it's not taken seriously as some it hurts our overall image.  Although whose to say who is serious and who is just going through a stage?  It's not my place to judge and I really try hard not too.     

[supremecatoverlord]

First of all, your post indicates that you're living a life that's deeply entangled within the influence of other people's opinions. If you want to be a guy, what do you care what other people think about your transition? Just be yourself.

What you're saying is as ridiculous as a guy refusing to come out as gay because he's afraid he's going to have a bunch of fruit-flies stalking him and asking to go shopping with him.

[lilacwoman]

being an active lesbian can make a female think she is TS when she isn't. 
I think this may happen more with teenage girls as they are still going through puberty and are more susceptible to hormonal influences of lesbianism.


pop singers get lots of attention when they crossdress or appear to be TG so impressionable young girls could juts be influenced subliminally by this.

we need more research into what makes FtMs but as most of the researchers are gay and penophiliacs they aren't much interested in people with vaginas - which is why they call MtFs effeminate homosexuals.

[Natkat]

well, I am not on tuble but as a nerd I have experience the thing in the manga comunety.
in a way its very easy to be trans there cause people already crossdressing* (dressing up as characters of the opposite gender as yourself)
and when you crossdress also its easy to refern the person as a "he" or "she" cause the person is in a role of some character.

but yeah, in some way I experienced alittle people wanting to be a boy, for small reasons, which had to annoy me in a point where I thought they might not be serious about it.

So I understand the felling, but as it said again we are no god to jugde how other people wanna life there life.
I would go so far and say, people who identify as male yet may not have top surgery or whatever, probably know what there going into as the choice they make for there own body and as long there satified with themself and care for there life, I will care for my.

on second mind,
if people simply dont identify as male but just trying to "be cool", they would end it pretty fast, its just way to complicated being trans if your not serious about it.

[King Malachite]

I was watching a guy on Youtube and he said he came in contact with someone who had been following his transition and told him that he got T without going to therapy and that this person didn't want surgery or anything (not that it makes you less of a man for not wanting it) but the guy asked this person if he had any plans for future transition.  Come to find out it was just a butch lesbian who wanted to take T for a little bit to make herself look more masculine yet keep some of her female appearance and the guy was just shocked.

Every guy is different and some are perfectly fine with what they have.  It's just redefining what it can mean to be trans and that's fine.

However, I hate to sound blunt but when it comes to those who think transitioning is a "cool" thing to do or is just trying to do it to look more masculine or whatever reason similar to my above story....well how they chose to destroy their lives doesn't affect me a bit and it shouldn't affect your life.  You know what's best for you.

[Kelly J. P.]

You know, the ones who 'chose' to be trans, or ask you to call them by male pronouns but yet flounces around their female body with no issue?

Those ones. They bother me a little bit. It's illogical, really... we're not all entitled to dysphoria, after all. However, if they go, "Oh, woops! Guess I'm really a girl after all" - and there's a lot of them - then it would negatively affect the community. Not to mention being feminine as a transguy or masculine as a transgirl reflects poorly on the community as-is; at the very least, it doesn't help our brain-body-difference theory's credibility in the eyes of the unlearned.

I haven't noticed the 'fad' to be very popular, but I'll be glad if it never is.

[Elijah3291]

You know, the ones who 'chose' to be trans, or ask you to call them by male pronouns but yet flounces around their female body with no issue?

yes, this I dont understand.  I can understand effeminate trans guys, guys who like nail polish, makeup, dresses.  But I absolutely cannot understand the effeminate trans guys who show off their female assets in a feminine way, like trans guys in a corset not binding underneath.  I saw a video of a trans guy who is talking about he is starting T in a week or two and he had long feminine styled hair, makeup, womens clothing, and no binding at all. I just didnt understand it.

like I said, I understand being feminine, but I just dont get the trans guys who "love their boobs" etc

[he who shall not be named]

Not to mention being feminine as a transguy or masculine as a transgirl reflects poorly on the community as-is; at the very least, it doesn't help our brain-body-difference theory's credibility in the eyes of the unlearned.

Are you really saying that feminine trans guys and masculine trans women reflect badly on the community? Feminine trans men and butchy trans women cannot be help responsible for the ignorance of cis people. If someone uses my (male) femininity to dismiss the entire trans* community as fake, that's not on me; that's on them. To say otherwise is sounds a lot like gender policing.

w/r/t the whole 'fad' thing, I agree with what everyone else says; even if someone else is faking being trans, it doesn't make your identity less valid.

[supremecatoverlord]

I saw a video of a trans guy who is talking about he is starting T in a week or two and he had long feminine styled hair, makeup, womens clothing, and no binding at all. I just didnt understand it.

Erm, can you link me to this video?
I'm kind of curious now to see how ridiculous this is.

[Inkwe Mupkins]

You know, the ones who 'chose' to be trans, or ask you to call them by male pronouns but yet flounces around their female body with no issue.

This also bothers me. I've seen people call themselves transmen, are extremely effeminite, then wear makeup, women's clothes, shave their body hair, and are comfortable with female names and pronouns, etc. Basically that's just a effeminate women. I think it's the reason a lot of the trans community has trouble being understood, because of people like that.

But then again. I think the trans community includes all gender variant people. So in a way it's supposed to be confusing. It's like the trans community is a massive blob of scribbles and everyone including ourselves want it to be a nice straight line that is easily identifiable and pleasant to look at.

[King Malachite]

Erm, can you link me to this video?
I'm kind of curious now to see how ridiculous this is.

Sure here you go.   



I thought about posting the link initially.  I should have lol.


OOPS my bad Jason I read that wrong lol I thought that was to me but I'll keep up the link anyways.

[supremecatoverlord]

Sure here you go.   



I thought about posting the link initially.  I should have lol.


OOPS my bad Jason I read that wrong lol I thought that was to me but I'll keep up the link anyways.

It's alright.
I still enjoyed the link you posted.
:]

[Devlyn]

As Susans members, we all know that anyone who transcends their birth gender for any reason is welcome here. (Announcements Section) We should not judge others based on their presentation not meshing with our own. Hugs, Devlyn

[Hermione01]

^ I agree Devlyn. Some identify as A, and have female bodies taking T.  They like the blend of two.  No one should be judging them.

[notyouraverageguy]

I agree with Elijah, and many of you. I understand there are different ways to be a transguy, and its okay to be a femme transguy...But to flaunt your girly parts, really gets me. I feel like these type of people give us a bad name, in a way that people will look at us like we are a joke.

But don't let it effect how you feel, and who you are.
Be you, be confident in who you are.