Feeling like Hell

[K Style Addiction]

I've hit a depression low, i look at myself and wonder why i continue? Am i passable/pretty or am i just wasting my time then the other thoughts are just slipping between suicidal thoughts and just feeling like crap, i take pills everyday without fail. I feel like no one understands me, like i said before the silence can kill and i just needed somewhere to vent out. I feel like just breaking something, i feel so bad...everything is just so blah...ugh, please don't be harsh on me

[Kitty_Babe]

urgh, Donna

Being a woman, is not all about just looking pretty,. People have said to you, yes you ARE pretty. I actually said to you, do 'not' feed those dark thoughts, they lead to trouble. There are lots of women in the world with the same confidence problems as you, I mean hey ! I am not 'pretty' but I am still a woman. Being pretty is not an absolute, this is not the be all and end all to womanhood. As far as I see from your photo, you look fine, and you'll 'do'. OK most of us aren't super models, or even near that, but you are who you are, and no one can take that from you, only yourself.

Promise me, you won't continue beating yourself up ? there are plenty of people in the world who would probably like to do that to anyone, just for kicks anyway. You promise me you wont do anything stupid.. You got your whole life ahead of you, all you need is 'Confidence'.

Now smile, and take your mind away from those dark thoughts you are having.

Hugs

Catherine.

[Bird]

Don't worry Donna, we all have ups and downs. Eventually this down will be far off in the horizon and you will be feeling better. Try to do something that distracts and helps you relax. Are you seeing a psychiatrist about these issues?

Feel free to always vent here, we understand.

[K Style Addiction]

Are you seeing a psychiatrist about these issues?

I am sort of, my psychiatrist doesn't say much and when he speaks i can't understand what he says, so i dunno.

People have said to you, yes you ARE pretty.

It's this damn depression, sorry .

[Kitty_Babe]

I am sort of, my psychiatrist doesn't say much and when he speaks i can't understand what he says, so i dunno.

It's this damn depression, sorry .

Yeah really ? - we all get those, you really need to learn to cope with it. Of course its not easy, I know I have had many depression's over the years, some aren't even gender related in any sort of way. The problem is no one, can talk you out of feeling depressed, you have to find the courage to face it, and learn to cope with those dark thoughts, in some kind of positive way. Bringing an end to your life, is pretty gruesome, and possibly even painful.

You should talk to your Doctor anyway right away, and explain to them what's wrong. They should hopefully get you some help, but of course as long as you need to talk, I am here. You can continue to PM me if you want. Just talk to people.

[Sephirah]

I may be way off base here, and if so, then please accept my apologies and ignore what I'm about to say:

I don't think that how pretty you are is the underlying issue here. Having read the way you feel at these times, something else springs to mind. It strikes me that the deeper issue is that you feel invisible, or that no one is listening to you? Like... hmm... maybe you feel like you could be standing in a room screaming at the top of your lungs and no one even looks up?

This is just a feeling I get from the things you've said, but do you think perhaps that the reason you want people to tell you that you're pretty is because maybe you feel that if people think you're stunningly ravishing that they'll actually pay attention to what you have to say and really make the effort to listen to you?

You mention that where you are, that you feel like it's silent, or that you don't have a voice. Do you feel that people seeing you as pretty will give you that voice?

*hug* Honey, you're beautiful, but your voice has to come from within you, you know? Self-expression is more than just what's on the outside. What kinds of things do you like to do? What activities do you enjoy?

[Kitty_Babe]

lol sorry Donna, I think you are being way too hard on yourself, but of course you wouldn't believe you are fine and will do. By that logic, I better give up as well ? DONNA SERIOUSLY ! look at women in the world around you, they all look different, some of them are not attractive, some are, but they all have their own unique looks, and things that make them female. You think you won't do - what happens if you go out to a bar, and some guy hits on you for a date ? - you will think "OMG" this guys likes me ? "is he blind" ? - Donna. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, you are not to judge yourself harshly on this.

[Kitty_Babe]

I may be way off base here, and if so, then please accept my apologies and ignore what I'm about to say:

I don't think that how pretty you are is the underlying issue here. Having read the way you feel at these times, something else springs to mind. It strikes me that the deeper issue is that you feel invisible, or that no one is listening to you? Like... hmm... maybe you feel like you could be standing in a room screaming at the top of your lungs and no one even looks up?

This is just a feeling I get from the things you've said, but do you think perhaps that the reason you want people to tell you that you're pretty is because maybe you feel that if people think you're stunningly ravishing that they'll actually pay attention to what you have to say and really make the effort to listen to you?

You mention that where you are, that you feel like it's silent, or that you don't have a voice. Do you feel that people seeing you as pretty will give you that voice?

*hug* Honey, you're beautiful, but your voice has to come from within you, you know? Self-expression is more than just what's on the outside. What kinds of things do you like to do? What activities do you enjoy?

+10 internet points for this. Its some thing to consider Donna