The New you know you pass when

[Jake25]

My friend (who met me after transition) was trying to explain how tampons feel to a guy.  She said she never really felt it once it was secure and then turned and asked me "Do you ever feel it?"

Another time, I was using my one friend's new DS, which has an interesting program that takes your picture and then lets you play a game involving shooting the pictures... Anyways, it identified my face as a "young female face" and she was like, "hey, they got it right"

Another time, with the same friend, we were talking about Modern Family and the gay couple on the show and I said something like "I love their baby" meaning I thought it was adorable.  For some reason she took it differently and said "Well maybe you can be their surrogate"

yeah, I might have more, but I can't remember

What game is that on DS?

[FairyHime]

What game is that on DS?

3DS systems come with some free software included. One of those is that game, called Face Raiders.

[Sammy]

I run into possibly awkward situation today.

We had course on safety issues at work (crisis situations, fire, emergency evac etc etc etc - with RF being our big neighbour and crisis in UKR all this stuff suddenly seems more important than a couple of years ago...) - and today we had practice lesson on the use of fire extinguishers.

I was walking to the main office building when I was joined by a guy from neighboring department - we met each other a couple of time, I know what's his name is, and he does not know mine. We were chatting on our way to the lecture, as well as during return journey and he was constantly using female gender and pronouns when talking to me... I was wondering if I should tell him, but in the end I did not. And now I am a bit terrified that this might come up one day and become very awkward (I am fully out at work, but I am not hiding it either - it's just I am not making loud and open statements).  But apparently, this shows that something has to be done about it, because when complete strangers and distant acquaintances gender You female no matter what You are wearing.... it's probably called a male fail (and yet, I still tend to see a guy or guy-ish features when looking in the mirror).

[suzifrommd]

And now I am a bit terrified that this might come up one day and become very awkward (I am fully out at work, but I am not hiding it either - it's just I am not making loud and open statements).

Has he told you about his medical history? Surgeries? Medications? How about his personal history? Where has he worked in the past? Where has he lived?

You don't owe him an accounting of your history any more than he owes you an accounting of his, right?

[Sammy]

Has he told you about his medical history? Surgeries? Medications? How about his personal history? Where has he worked in the past? Where has he lived?

You don't owe him an accounting of your history any more than he owes you an accounting of his, right?

I dunno, it's just sooner or later we will run again into each other (we work in the same buildng) and since my name is male, there might be some awkwardness .

On the other hand, I breached another threshold last Saturday, as me and kiddo went to seaside and at some point of time she had nature's call, so I decided to heck with it, I am not taking 4 y.o. girl to guy's room - and there was no option for family room (the route which we usually follow) - and so we went to female restroom instead (first time in my life ever). Not that anyone saw us there apart of attendant, but at least she did not say a word.

[big kim]

When the bus fills up with kids as school finishes and no one says anything.Happened today, I normally avoid the bus or tram when school let's out.

[iKate]

You know when you pass when..,

You're dressed in jeans and a (unisex) t shirt and a homeless guy asks, "miss can you spare any change?"

[RavenL]

Shopping at Target today walk by a mother and her son, few seconds later hear "Mom that's a really tall girl" and the mom saying "She is tall, she might be a basketball player." That made me smile.

[katiej]

I went out with some trans friends last night. When I walked to the restaurant nobody seemed to notice me, but after dinner we all walked a few blocks together and I could literally feel everyone staring at us.

One of my friends is a great girl, but she couldn't pass on her best day. Cheap costume wig, ill-fitting halter top dress, walks like a dude...you get the picture.

I'm under no illusion that I pass 100%, but last night I got a glimpse of what she deals with.

As we transition, we're all super aware of people looking at us and it takes some time to get over the idea that they all know I'm trans. Sometimes they're just checking out your outfit.

So this experience of walking down the street with and without her made it clear that I'm doing pretty well ☺

[Sammy]

I went out with some trans friends last night. When I walked to the restaurant nobody seemed to notice me, but after dinner we all walked a few blocks together and I could literally feel everyone staring at us.

One of my friends is a great girl, but she couldn't pass on her best day. Cheap costume wig, ill-fitting halter top dress, walks like a dude...you get the picture.

I'm under no illusion that I pass 100%, but last night I got a glimpse of what she deals with.

As we transition, we're all super aware of people looking at us and it takes some time to get over the idea that they all know I'm trans. Sometimes they're just checking out your outfit.

So this experience of walking down the street with and without her made it clear that I'm doing pretty well ☺

Gah.... I had the same thing yesterday! Usually, people dont give me a second look or "that stare", but yesterday I was walking through shopping mall, desperately (cause most nice and discounted stuff was for size 38-42 - I am size 46) looking for some ideas to expand my attire, and got two episodes, and they were not even in the shops dedicated exclusively for ladies. The first one was an older lady, who was walking towards me and as I caught her stare, she kept looking into my eyes for longer than is considered to be polite. And the other one was with middle-aged woman, who did the same. I still have no idea what that meant - maybe I need to reconsider some steps and roll backwards with my outfit and presentation into more andro, or on the contrary, I was too andro for them, and they could not figure out who the heck I was...

[Tessa James]

I went out with some trans friends last night. When I walked to the restaurant nobody seemed to notice me, but after dinner we all walked a few blocks together and I could literally feel everyone staring at us.

One of my friends is a great girl, but she couldn't pass on her best day. Cheap costume wig, ill-fitting halter top dress, walks like a dude...you get the picture.

I'm under no illusion that I pass 100%, but last night I got a glimpse of what she deals with.

As we transition, we're all super aware of people looking at us and it takes some time to get over the idea that they all know I'm trans. Sometimes they're just checking out your outfit.

So this experience of walking down the street with and without her made it clear that I'm doing pretty well ☺

This is a fairly typical experience for some in our community and worthy of a separate thread.  Contrasts with those in a different place, how does that feel?  thank you for the inspiration.

[Kaydee]

I had just updated my driver's licence to my new name and picture (yipee!).  Afterwards I went to the library and while there asked if I could have my name updated that goes with my card.  The librarian brought up my account on her computer and then turned to the more experienced librarian sitting beside her:

Her:  Is this where I would update the name on his - uh, her card?
Him: That's the right field.  But you can't do it there.  That's her husband's card. 

It went on - I was enjoying their back-and-forth too much to clear it up by saying that I am transgender.  In the end I got me a new library card in my new name and took "my husband's" card with me as well.

[antonia]

Over the weekend I had to cross borders twice, first entering the USA from Canada and then going back to Canada from the USA, unfortunately my passport has not been updated for several years :c(

When crossing into the States me and my partner (she's CIS) drove to the booth and the man politely told us we had to go inside for me to get a visitors permit, at this point he takes both our passports and then tells us to go inside a building and wait for our names to be called which we do.

When our names were called we took different paths so I got to the desk first, the immigration agent then referred to me by my partners name, I corrected her and told her no, I'm (insert old name here) at which point she got that "deer in the headlights" confused look, then my partner arrived causing a second wave of confusion to wash over her, she recovered in about 5 seconds, a bit later she asked me if I was sure because my first visit to the US on my own was in '99 and that did not add up, I then pointed out I'm 35 and she wen't "Ohhh".

On the way back I handed the Canadian Immigration official our passports, he looked a bit, we had a talk about customs things and value of things I was bringing and then he said: "I don't want to be a stickler but you really need to renew your documents", I proceeded to explain to him about all the hoops I've been trying to jump through and told him I'd like nothing more than to get them updated, he then commented that this was really silly because it made their job so much harder.

[barbie]

he then commented that this was really silly because it made their job so much harder.

Sure. He is doing a good job.

barbie~~

[Eva Marie]

I had an interesting experience last night.

I was making a trip to see a friend and of course I had to stop to pee. I stopped at a McDonald's and as I walked in I stopped by a trash can outside to throw something away. There were two women and a guy also throwing stuff away and they joked about us all doing the same thing.

I followed them into the restaurant and the women both headed for the restroom with me right behind them, and the "we're doing the same thing" observation was made again.

There was 3 stalls and the women headed for two of them. Immediately after one woman came out and said to me "no toilet paper" before heading into the remaining stall.

I had enough sense not to head into the stall with no TP, so i stood outside and waited.

The woman then opened her stall before she went and offered to let me get some TP so that I could use the other stall.

So, I tore off a length of TP from her stall, thanked her, and went into my stall.

I think thats a pass.

[big kim]

I went to my local bike meet to see a very rare Harley Davidson K model and mixed with the bikers(all sorts from 1% club members,owners of classics,Harleys,Japanese,British and European bikes).No comments or remarks.

[antonia]

Cycling home with a hangover, no makeup and wearing a helmet, gloves, and riding a Cannondale Bad Boy in matte black I got stopped by a woman with two kids asking where were good places to cycle safely in the park, when one of the kids started yelling that she did not want to cycle through the zoo the woman said "be quiet, I'm talking to the nice lady here".

I kinda needed that after getting referred to as "him" by an employee at my favourite lunch place.

[allisonsteph]

Three weeks ago I had a panic attack at work and they called an ambulance. Why going over my medical history the paramedic asked me "I know you said you're 46, but is there any possibility you could be pregnant?".

Than made my day even though I had to go to the hospital.

[Tessa James]

Three weeks ago I had a panic attack at work and they called an ambulance. Why going over my medical history the paramedic asked me "I know you said you're 46, but is there any possibility you could be pregnant?".

Than made my day even though I had to go to the hospital.

Oh that is perfectly fun and validating.  Made me think I would love to reply with; Well we have tried but....."

[Jill F]

My wife got carded for beers at Dodger Stadium yesterday.  When I grabbed one of them, I was carded as well. When the clerk noticed that we have the same last name, she asked if we were sisters.  When we explained that we were married, she just assumed it was a very recent thing and congratulated us.

Passing for cis is nice, but I passed for plausibly 20.  Jill for the double win!