Do you ever feel your family is just humoring you?

[Jay20]

I told my parents that I was transitioning from female-to-male over a year ago, I've been on T for over a year and recently legally changed my name. Even though my parents say they are okay with it and they act like everything is okay, they refuse to call me by my new name and still misgender me all the time. It is really irritating. My sister, who was totally unaccepting at first, has made a complete 180 and calls me by my new name and even apologizes when she misgenders me. Even her husband has never been anything else buy 100% supportive. My parents wonder why I never visit them anymore. The main reason is that I still feel uncomfortable when I am with them.

Is anyone else in the same boat? What did it take to get through to annoying family members?

[Felix]

My family is okay, but I feel like I'm just being humored by a handful of other people in my life. It hurts and I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm tired of reminding them, especially when it seems like they respond to my reminding with the right name and pronouns because it makes me happy, not because they think they're accurate. Ick.

[amdee]

Yes, i get this all the time and i have to ignore it just to be able to talk to them, most of my family have just blanked me, horrible thing to have to go through.

[Vin]

I'm pretty sure all the people at work are humouring me. I wish my parents/family WOULD start humouring me because anything is better than them calling me *she* and *birth name* It hurts, and mum wonders why I never want to go see her, or the rest of my family anymore. *sighs*

[Jeatyn]

Definitely, it's been almost 4 years now since I came out and started insisting on he and Nick. People say they ok with it but then go ahead and carry on misgendering and using my old name. Saying they "aren't used to it yet" - how long will it take?!

Then things happen like my sister will say to me "uuuh that hair at the side of your face looks like sideburns" pulling a weird face at me - um yeah? That's why I cut it like that? o_0 How are you not getting this

[MacKenzie]

 Yeah I think most family members act like they accept it at first thinking maybe it's just a phase so they kinda humor you a little bit then when you take more drastic steps in your transition they freak out.

[Natkat]

its first this year my parrent has started to use male pronoucing for me, before that it was always female.
everbody wants to be accepting, but I belive theres a diffrence between saying your accepting and be so..
sure they might not understand but come to terms later on, most transpeople had those fights, some parrents can never really learn to use another name or pronouce and some can, but give it a chance.

[Misato]

Yeah, I think people in general are just humoring me.  Monday a friend referred to me as "dressing as a woman" and that cut me, deep.  She later used my name but I think to her my female name is equalinent to a nickname.  I gave her a pass only because I was so shocked.

[Kitoro]

My entire family is incredibly accepting of me, and they all make an effort to use correct pronounces and name etc.
It took my mother quite awhile to get the guts to call me by my chosen name, she told me it was because I just didnt fit the part for her. She raised a daughter etc. For many parents switching over like this is difficult and some parents are stubborn to start doing it.
My mum misgenders me constantly, uses female pronounces but I can tell she is trying.

It's frustrating, and when she does it it makes me uncomfortable, I correct her often, and I can tell she feels bad when she gets it wrong.

If your parents refuse to do it, just flat out refuse, have you talked to them about it and asked why they are? if they are accepting of you, I dont quite understand why they would refuse to call you by your name.

[auburnAubrey]

My mom still feels all the regular mom guilt.... and I get that.  I also think she'll get over it.

When I told my daughter, she was actually very receptive, and even said "Well, it's not like you've got cancer or something".... and we had a great chat.

Since that time, she's talked about moving down with me (She's 24, and still in the area she went to college).  Today, when talking to her, I asked "Are you going to be ok being here with me as I go through this change?"  to which she replied "no".

Totally took me back.  She's open minded, but after how the conversation went before, I was suprised to hear this.

I'm all for everyone having their own path.  I understand that.  And if she doesnt' want to be around me that's cool...... I totally respect that.  But it was a shock hearing it, and I wondered just what our previous conversation was all about.......

[Felix]

When I told my daughter, she was actually very receptive, and even said "Well, it's not like you've got cancer or something".... and we had a great chat.

Lol all I could think of was marketing campaigns when I read this. "Transsexualism - It's Not Cancer!"