Discouraged... trying to get top surgery *rant*

[Hayzer12]

I was trying to think positively about getting top surgery this year... but I really don't see how it's going to happen.

I can't get a job right now. I know it may seem like I'm making excuses, but I live in a small town, and people only hire people that they know. I've had a few interviews, and I've done well, only to find out that the person that gets the job is a niece or a nephew to a manager or something ridiculously close to such. I'm a full-time biology student, and I start school again next month. This is my senior year (and hopefully my last year..oi) and after school I plan on moving to NYC. I have three prospective jobs on the contingency that I receive my degree in May. I have budgeted on low figure of what I could be making and I'm going to be able to save quite a bit once I do get there and start working. However, I just really don't want to have to wait potentially another year and a half to get top surgery.

I'm 22 years old, and I want to experience my youth in the body that I have wanted my entire life. I am going to be a year on T coming in October, and I'm just so ready to be done with the top surgery aspect. I can live a couple years without having bottom surgery, but top surgery is a priority of mine... and it's getting to the point where I really don't know what to do.

I have student loans, scholarships and grants to pay for school, and I switched to a CHEAPER school so that I could save money for these reasons, but the thing is... my parents got a divorce and I was forced to get an apartment. I knew I would have to be on my own sooner or later, but the timing was horrible.

Paying for myself completely independently is challenging, and I cannot save ANY money whatsoever. It takes every time I have to go towards rent, bills, food and transportation.

5000 dollars is a lot of money to just borrow off of someone. I can't ask people in my family, even if I know that they may have it*which most do NOT just have 5000 dollars lying around*

I was wondering if some of you guys can  let me know what you did... or what you plan on doing.

I'm going to continue to look for a job, but I just don't see it happening in this town.

I am stealth, and I went kayaking with some guy friends of mine last week... needless to say, they all wondered why I kept my shirt on the entire time. I just fed them some bullcrap story about how my torso is extremely sensitive to the sun, to which they laughed and made of me for a solid hour. Only one of my guy friends knows about this, and he asked me privately how long it would be until I could get my surgery. He seemed truly concerned with the heat and me having a shirt on(it was bordering on 112 degrees F).

I just hate that I wasn't born like everyone else, and it makes things so difficult to be stealth. I hate it. It's causing some major dysphoria, and hatred to my body. I really don't know if I'm going to be able to stand it much longer, but I don't know what else I can do.

So any tips you guys have, which I know there's probably not a lot you can say, would be appreciated..

Ideas for fundraisers, anything...

I would appreciate it.

[Nygeel]

This might just be me but I would suggest not moving to NYC. The cost of living here is ridiculous. You're lucky to get a studio apartment for under $1500 a month, then you have to think of utilities (about an extra $100-$200 a month).

You could try applying for a grant for The Jim Collins Foundation if you have a letter to get top surgery, there are some fund raising type...things like kickstarter to help raise money, usually art related projects (but I know there are others). You could also try doing some fundraisers in your area (if you have that as a possibility) things like a bake sale or if you requent a bar or club, talking to the owners to promote a charity night to pay for surgery.

[Hayzer12]

I would make more money in NYC doing what I do than I would here, and I have found places in Chelsea for 1200 with utilities. I calculated everything, and the cost of living versus what I'll be making is about the same amount of extra cash.. It basically goes down to scenery. I'd rather be there than here.

The grant thing is a good idea.. thanks Nygeel

[Nygeel]

I would make more money in NYC doing what I do than I would here, and I have found places in Chelsea for 1200 with utilities. I calculated everything, and the cost of living versus what I'll be making is about the same amount of extra cash.. It basically goes down to scenery. I'd rather be there than here.

The grant thing is a good idea.. thanks Nygeel

I'm hardcore shocked that there are places in Chelsea for $1200 with utilities.

[wheat thins are delicious]

I'm saving what I can, when I can.  I'll have the money within a year or two I hope.

[Ryan B.]

I feel for you man.  It can be so frustrating when you feel stuck; when you want to move forward but you can't.  In that sense, I'm in a similar situation.  Andy has the right idea; save up whatever money you can for now.  Sounds like you're already trying to come up with a good game plan.