My Timeline (w/photos)

[Sarah Anne]

Hi all! I decided to re-post a post I made over in the "before and after" forum. Truth is, I'm not one to start a blog or anything like that. I am documenting my transition but not "publically" so to speak... I would however like to update my progress from time to time and I hated to keep eating up space in the "before and after" thread so I brought it over here to my own. I've even added a new pic since the original post and I have been touched by everyone's comments...you have all been inspirational and uplifted my spirits beyond words! ^_^


Below is the original post...from July 26, 2012
_________________________
Hi everyone...this is a first for me but I really wanted to share what I've done so far.I am turning 40 on Saturday (OMG! I'M IN DENIAL! LOL) and I've gotten a late start.As you can tell, I'm new and my original intro can be seen at https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,123433.0.html
I know this is more of the "before and after HRT" thread and it's important to say I am currently Pre-HRT". Yet in the past year and a half, I've been working very hard to prepare myself for the big event. This is what I have done by just growing out my hair, starting a daily facial and body moisturizer routine, laser hair removal and beginning to lose weight. I have my first endo appointment on Oct 4th. I'm only out to my wife, 2 best friends and the medical community. This is the first I've shared this on-line


Here I am back in 2005





Let my hair grow out for the first time in winter 2011
This is where I decide to begin transition...and start shaping my brows.
Also begin intensive facial and skin care regimen.







Jump ahead 1 year to January 2012
I have had 5 laser hair removal treatments and I am down 10 pounds from the last photo.
3 months later, I start getting mistaken for a female in public
This is no makeup







Here is May 2012. I am down 15 pounds from my starting weight.
I've been living part time as Sarah for 1 month.
This is with makeup







June 2012 - My hair has gotten long enough to pull back! 9 inches!
Finished my 9th LHR treatment





July 2012 - Down a total of 25 pounds from my starting weight.
Because of my hair length and skin appearance, it's getting a bit difficult passing as a guy when I need to.





August 2,2012 - I decide to give bangs a try but I'm not sold on it!





Here I am from top to bottom...





And my trip to therapy yesterday







And finally the side by side comparisons we all love!





______________________________
Since I posted this originally, I have lost my job. My position is being outsourced overseas. That kinda sucks because I'm kind of the middle of transitioning here and I am really debating about having to cut my hair for an interview. That will completely break my heart...but I have no intention on cancelling my endo appointment because I REALLY want it and I think all of this is the primary reason I'm not completely depressed about losing my job after 14 years! I love what I'm doing and it might be the opportune time to seek employment as my new self....just a thought!


Some things I will add because people asked in the other thread...
- I am just under 6' tall
- My shoe size is a women's 9 to 9 1/2
- I've been doing this part time for about 4 months now
- I love my wife with every fiber of my being. I am not attracted to men.
- My legal name will be Sarah with a middle name of Anne. I ran them together on my screen name because just "Sarah" was already taken! LOL!
- No, I have never had any hormone treatment but I am excited as hell to get started!!
- My voice isn't overly high pitched, but I'm able to at least pass.
- So far in public, no one has called me out...yet I still worry about it the whole time :/


I simply LOVE looking at people's photo timelines and seeing the changes they go through. As I start HRT, I wanted to be able to update a photo now and then so this will do nicely. Timelines have been my inspiration and it's a shame not everyone shares theirs. But a lot of folks are self conscious about how they look and even though people have responded quite positively to my timeline, I am too!  I have to admit, looking back at my own timeline (and I've got over 100 photos in total), I'm thrilled with the changes I've made to myself...but that doesn't mean I'm confident about them.


Thanx for looking!!

Sarah ^_^

[Michelle G]

You should be thrilled   you look great!!!

[ShadeOfGray]

Wow Sarah! I thnk you already pass 100 percent! Absolutely beautiful. HRT is going to be amazing for you.

[PHXGiRL]

Such a great change you look great Sarah 100% passing! HRT does wonderful things!

[Madison Leigh]

You do look great, and I *really* like that outfit in the newest picture. 


Madison

[Alexis]

I'm still absolutely stunned that you're pre-HRT    You look wonderful!

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Hey!  Not fair trying to pass off your brother as you.


You look awesome Sarah.  You have come so far and pre-HRT.  I can't wait to see how you do on HRT. 

[Assoluta]

I'll always be honest about whether people pass, and according to your photo at least, it looks like you pass completely - you don't have any unusually masculine features in your face at all! Even your earliest picture doesn't show any overly masculine eyebrow or jawline shape! I think you've gone through the phenomenon that I and others I know have gone through - which is feminising just before considering full transition even without hormones - almost as if the body 'knows!'

[sonopoly]

Wow-amazing - you look fantastic! Icing on top of the beautiful cake...

[Sara Thomas]

Beautiful! Wouldn't think anything other than "There's a happy and pretty woman," if I spotted ya out and about.

And I've gotta ask: where on earth did you get those calves?!!

M'best - Sadie

[Arch]

Wow. To talk like one of my students, I totally thought you had been on HRT for like years.

I think that one head shot with bangs looks really great, despite your reservations. Maybe the bangs make you look a little younger? Anyway, I thought it was a super cute look.

[NotThereYet]

 Hi Sarah,

I am very sorry to hear about your losing employment, Sarah, that must be very hard. I have been there myself, like most of us this day and age, and it is kind of devastating, but the good news is: you will find another job, and you don't need to get a haircut, you are perfect the way you are. I love your bangs! Just be yourself, and I assure you that even if some prospective employers will not look at you favorably, others will. Who would want to work with closed minded people anyway?

May I ask you which part of the country you live in and what industry you work in? Once again, now that you can indeed send PM's, you can most definitely send me a PM, if you don't feel comfortable answering these questions on a public forum. The reason why I ask here instead of asking you in a PM, is that I think that sharing our stories with all our sisters and brothers here (yes, I know it sounds a bit exaggerated to use terms like "brothers and sisters", but I really like it here) we can help others, just like it helps us when we read about others' experiences.

Well, I am glad about your passing on the phone, it does give a nice warm feeling, doesn't it? I love getting "ma'amed" on the phone, it feels so nice and natural.

Do you know when you would like to start HRT? I am fixing to start next week and I am very excited about it!!! :-) And when I find the courage I will start posting pictures of my timeline!!!


Take good care of yourself and keep your head up: you will find another job,
Andrea

[NotThereYet]

PS Sarah, I forgot to tell you how beautiful you look. Such a pity you are not into guys: they would go gaga over you! I wish I was half as beautiful as you are: no guy would be able to resist me! :-)

Andrea

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Damn, Sarah.  I could swear that you are my boss at school.. You could be her doppelganger.

[Sarah Anne]

First of all.....to everyone who has responded to this point, you've made me the happiest girl in the world! My eyes have gotten welled up yet again by your kind and loving remarks!! I have crossdressed and played with makeup most of my life and I have NEVER (and I can't stress that enough) NEVER seen a woman in the mirror. As I've aged, I kept trying and hoping that one day, someone I've never met before would smile back at me...but instead it got worse with age. But now something has happened and I'm not sure what. I kind of still don't believe it so I "really" wanted others opinions and that's why I've shared it. My wife started telling me back in December, "you look like a girl!" and I just didn't see it. And then in March when I was "ma'amed" at a local restaurant that I've been to a thousand times before, I really started to pay attention and snap photos for comparison. In my mind, there was NO WAY I would go out in the world and attempt to pass as a female. When I told my therapist about the comment at the restaurant, he said "now maybe you'll see what the rest of the world is seeing!". My father hates my hair and makes snide remarks about it constantly to me, his friends and other family. He's mid 70s so it's understandable why I can't tell him...very set in his ways. But a few months or so ago, he said "I don't know son...I just hope to hell you soon start looking like a guy again!" That was another eye opener that things were indeed changing! And for the longest time, I figured since I didn't notice anything, no one else did either. Now I know that most people are just too polite to ask...

@Michelle G - I am "completely" thrilled! TY so very much!

@ShadeOfGray - TY too! Be that as it may, I'm STILL always nervous to go out!

@Serena Lynn - TY but no HRT yet...I can't wait!

@Madison Leigh - hehe! I just got that suit last weekend at Dress Barn. It was the 3rd time in my life that I went clothes shopping with my wife. After being limited to the internet for shopping, it is the most wonderful thing to actually go out and shop! I came out to show the suit to my wife and the sales lady told me how well it looked (yet have they ever told you how ->-bleeped-<-ty you look!?!? LOL!) But the absolute coolest part was when the girl wrote "Sarah" on the door with the blue marker~! That was for ME!! I'd been there several times with my wife always wishing I'd see my name on that door!!!! ^_^

@Alexis - Thanx! I didn't realize how profound it was until I had posted here

@Ms. Obrien - LOL! That made my day!! I only have an older sister But seriously TY! I can only hope HRT improves what I've got.

@Assoluta - Wow! Again, thank you! From dressing over the years, I never though I had a feminine appearace or features at all. But no, I never had any real strong guy features either. Luckily I have basically no adams apple either which I always found strange. But it's funny you should mention about the body "knowing"...throughout my life, I seriously NEVER imagined I would do this...then when I started letting my hair grow, I noticed things looked different. For the longest time, I chalked it up to "well everyone looks different with longer hair!" When I'd pull the hair back, I looked like me again. But as time went on into the spring, I noticed I did look different with my hair back. Another case in point was in February, long before I was going out, I bought a pair of gray mid calf boots I really liked. Not able to try them on in the store, I got home and found that I could not pull them up over my calves and they were very tight to get my foot into them. I kept them anyway hoping some day they would fit. Last week when I really started analyzing my body, I pulled them out and put them on. My foot slid right into them and they went all the way up over my calves without any issue at all. I noticed my calves have looked different recently when dressed. I know weight loss helps these areas quite a bit but I haven't lost that much weight between the last time they didn't fit to now. Over the past two months when I've gone to bed, my wife kept saying "something is happening to you!" Is it scientifically possible for the body to respond to something you're hoping for!? It's like wishing for a million dollars...but it ain't gonna happen I also wore a guy's 10 size shoe but recently when I started buying a lot more womens shoes, 9 to 9.5 are what fits me best...I dunno...it's actually a little scary!

@Sonopoly - Thanks so much! That was very sweet ^_^

@Sadie May - Thanx!! I admittedly still don't like my calves and want them to be smaller. But as I mentioned above, they are somehow smaller than they were and I'm not really doing any exercises

@Arch - Radical! (I dunno...do kids say radical anymore!?!?! LOL) Thanks for the comments on my bangs. I will admit here that they are "clip on". I couldn't get my hair cut like that yet because I still live 80% of my time in guy mode. My wife got them for herself but didn't like them, so having a very close color match, I gave it a try ^_^ (which by the way brings up a great point...having a loving an understanding wife makes for sharing all kinds of things!!)

@NotThereYet - HI Sweetie and thanx for following over to this thread! I was hoping you would!! I'm upset about my job because my wife's income isn't enough to support us. Plus the things I'm doing now are quite expensive and I fear I'll have to stop or even "cut my hair". My dad's first words were "you're gonna cut that hair right!?!?! You can't get a job ANYWHERE with long hair!!" I might take 2 or 3 inches off to make it more presentable, but I'll never take it back to spiky hair guy mode! It WILL grow back (well barring any unforeseen issues or diseases of course!) I live in PA and I'm an IT Systems Administrator. But I do live in a very rural conservative one light town where this kind of the thing just isn't accepted. Been here my whole life too so everyone knows my name! And on not being into guys, that's not to say I wouldn't like to be flirted with So far, an old guy at the deli counter next to me in line started talking to me about the price of meat and how it's too expensive. That's the only semi-flirtation I've ever had! LOL!
Congrats on starting HRT next week! I have my first appointment Oct 4 which was the soonest I could get in! I was amazed to even find an endo less than 10 minutes away that would work with TG people!!! Cuz like I said, this kinda thing doesn't play in these parts!! If you ever post your timeline, I'm looking forward to it! Your profile pic is very pretty too so I'm not sure why you are hesitant....scratch that, I know EXACTLY why you are hesitant...for the same reason I was! We never see ourselves the way others do.

So thank you all again for your kind words! I look forward to updating my progress on HRT as soon as I can! Documenting the process helps everyone who will follow us down this dark and dusty road. I have used others stories to get me where I am today. I hope someone else can make the same benefits that I have! Love you all!!

Sarah ^_^

[Sarah Anne]

Damn, Sarah.  I could swear that you are my boss at school.. You could be her doppelganger.

Am I a nice, kind, sweet, loving boss!?! If so, I might be her! LOL!

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Am I a nice, kind, sweet, loving boss!?! If so, I might be her! LOL!

She is!  And I love working for her.  I will miss her when I graduate.

[Jenny07]

Looking great Sarah, you should feel exited about the changes hormones will make as they will only enhance the great results you have achieved so far.

Keep us all updated on your adventures.

Go for it girl.

I look forward to sharing my journey as I have only recently come out to myself.

Jen

[Sarah Anne]

Looking great Sarah, you should feel exited about the changes hormones will make as they will only enhance the great results you have achieved so far.

Keep us all updated on your adventures.

Go for it girl.

I look forward to sharing my journey as I have only recently come out to myself.

Jen

Thank you Jen! I'm VERY excited and I can't wait to hear about your journey as well! So I'll keep you posted if you do the same!! ^_^

[Jenny07]

Wil do

I have just booked my first laser session for later today OZ time. Quite exited taking small steps.

Can't wait to get rid of the hair as I have always hated it.