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What am I doing wrong?

Started by alice10, August 18, 2012, 02:26:17 PM

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alice10

So I have been working on my voice for about 7-8 months now. The problem is it's a lot higher but it doesn't sound that feminine. I have read that people say when you talk feminine your adams apple should disappear not literally though. When I talk higher you can't see the adams apple anymore but it doesn't sound girly. I am able to control it. Another thing is its a lot harder to go into falsetto. Am I doing something wrong or do I need to do something else?


thanks for reading this!
Started transition October 2011
Went fulltime Nov 29 2012
SRS hopefully by 2014



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MadelineB

Quote from: alice89 on August 18, 2012, 02:26:17 PM
So I have been working on my voice for about 7-8 months now. The problem is it's a lot higher but it doesn't sound that feminine. I have read that people say when you talk feminine your adams apple should disappear not literally though. When I talk higher you can't see the adams apple anymore but it doesn't sound girly. I am able to control it. Another thing is its a lot harder to go into falsetto. Am I doing something wrong or do I need to do something else?

thanks for reading this!
Hi alice89!
You aren't necessarily doing anything wrong, just missing a few key steps you need to take to get to your authentic female voice.

Pitch (how high or low your voice's main tones are) is one component of male-female voice differences, but probably the least important, as you have found out. Many women have low pitched voices, and many men have high pitched voices. A falsetto is just a bass/baritone voice pitched into the alto/soprano range. The only advantage of a falsetto is it tends to force your resonance out of your chest and into your face, but it doesn't sound natural for a lot of people.

Timbre (resonance) is more important than pitch. Men's voices tend to resonate from the chest and deep in the throat, women's from high in the throat and even up in the sinuses. One source recommends that to find the resonance that works best for your female voice, first throw your voice up into a falsetto, so you feel all the resonance (vibration and under tones) move out of your chest and up into your mouth and nose. Then keep your mouth and throat shaped the same way (to hold onto the women's timbre) while slowly lowering the pitch until you just drop out of the falsetto. There's your voice!

The other big factor between male and female voices is intonation. In most languages, male voices are relatively flat in their intonation - think of how a golf announcer talks, for an exaggerated version of what I'm talking about - level and firm and unvaried in pitch. Female voices rise and fall throughout  individual words and throughout sentences and phrases. The changing pitch communicates emotion, feeling, and the speaker's personality (three things frowned upon when a man is speaking). For me, perhaps because I grew up surrounded by sisters and their friends (I hated small talk with boys) I naturally learned the intonation of girls in my culture, and had to work hard in junior high and high school to drive female expressiveness out of my voice so I wouldn't get so badly bullied. But it is something that anyone can learn and practice. It's really fun too. Loosen up your mouth, flap your jaw, let your voice sound like it's on a roller coaster, and you are ready to begin. Then listen to how girls really talk and imitate individual words, and whole phrases and sentences. Practice. One really easy one is to practice raising your pitch at the end of every statement. Girls tend to sound like they are asking a question even when they aren't. The reason is that every time a woman says something to another person, she cares what the other person thinks and feels, so the rising pitch conveys "I care what you think about what I'm saying. Please feel free to let me know how you feel about it".

It was funny, after I went through that exercise a few times and actually heard myself, I realized I had been using that voice my whole life, whenever I talked to babies, small animals, or was telling my wife how much I love her. I remember not being able to stand listening to phone messages I left for my wife because of how much I sounded like a girl. Bingo!

Now throw in vocabulary and grammar (some languages have entirely separate vocabulary and or verb endings that females prefer vs. males) and you will be female sounding to every person, even yourself.

Keep listening, keep practicing, and relax! Working on your voice is one of the funnest parts of transition. If you aren't good at hearing yourself, use your computer or a digital recorder so that you can play back your practice.

You can also sing along to female singers who are in your vocal range.

P.S. I used to be able to do a mean falsetto because I spent 30 years forcing my male voice into a low baritone/bass range to help me pass. But I found out from learning about my female voice that I am naturally a high tenor or alto, so I was actually hurting my voice by doing the bass thing. Speaking or singing in falsetto will strain your voice if singing in bass will.

P.P.S. I left out one more thing (though kind of implied it in the intonation section). Rhythm: girls vary the rhythm of their speech, while men sound like they are speaking with a metronome. Rhythm: girls actually sound like they are singing a song, especially a jazz or soul ballad, not just because of the varied pitch, but also because they speed up and slow down to communicate emphasis and emotion.

P.P.P.S. Oh, and vary the volume. Girls go loud and quiet all through their speech. Personality and family background will determine if the dominant volume is loud or whispery, but all female voices tend to vary much more in their intensity from soft to loud than men's voices.

Like I said, this is fun stuff! You finally get to play WITH your voice. So grab your voice and PLAY.
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
~Maya Angelou

Personal Blog: Madeline's B-Hive
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alice10

I have been trying to do what you mention...I can't figure out what I need to do differently. I would really appreciate it if someone would listen to my recordings to help guide me.

Here is my normal male voice
http://soundcloud.com/alicee89/male-voice

Here is what my female voice so far
http://soundcloud.com/alicee89/female-voice
Started transition October 2011
Went fulltime Nov 29 2012
SRS hopefully by 2014



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Ms. OBrien CVT

OK.  Your female voice is a bit too high.  Maybe come down in the pitch.  Intonation sounds good.   Maybe a wee bit nasally.

You ether very young or maybe more like a "valley" girl.  Otherwise you have come a long ways from the male side.  Definitely not the same person.  One is male and the other is female, no questions.

But you have to be happy with how you sound to yourself.

  
It does not take courage or bravery to change your gender.  It takes fear of living one more day in the wrong one.~me
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alice10

Thank you Ms. OBrien!! Its good to hear I am going in the right direction. Now I know what I need to do. I am 23 years old. Is my voice ok for my age?
Started transition October 2011
Went fulltime Nov 29 2012
SRS hopefully by 2014



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MadelineB

Quote from: alice89 on August 18, 2012, 10:39:42 PM
I have been trying to do what you mention...I can't figure out what I need to do differently. I would really appreciate it if someone would listen to my recordings to help guide me.

Here is my normal male voice
http://soundcloud.com/alicee89/male-voice

Here is what my female voice so far
http://soundcloud.com/alicee89/female-voice

First off Alice, excellent initiative!

That's a nice free online service for someone practicing their voice and for sharing recordings with others. :)

I will tell you, it sounds like you are making progress. I listened to your female voice first so I could just hear it on its own. You do a pretty good interpretation of a little girl there, but it sounds strained.
I suspect that your male voice isn't naturally that much in your nose; the pitch is not sounding natural for your pipes. We may need to drop it down and make it a little breathier to give you a big girl feel. You are also clipping your words. It's not just that you should go up and down between words, within each word itself there should be a nice rounding to the sound form, whereas boys have boxy words. Your girl voice has shortened the words and is spitting them out. You need to slide them out gently and warmly. Maybe it will help to listen to a quick pair that I uploaded to you, of me reading the words in my voices.
To me I sound like a dork, but everyone says I sound ok so I guess I do. Take a look at the difference in the shapes:
http://soundcloud.com/madelineb-1/sets/madelines-test-files-for

This is my first time trying to help anyone with their voice, so if I'm not making any sense let me know where I lost you.

P.S. I added a version that's more falsetto if you prefer a higher pitch:
http://soundcloud.com/madelineb-1/falsetto-for-alice89
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
~Maya Angelou

Personal Blog: Madeline's B-Hive
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MadelineB

P.S. It's going to feel wierd, but you need to get your jaw flapping! To make my voice sound like your female voice, I have to tighten up my mouth and lips and keep my tongue pushed back in my mouth.

You are going to want to get used to looking like a sexy woman when you talk, we need to be able to see your tongue, see your tonsils, and see your tongue play around and in and out. Your lips need to be animated, even a little bit kissy. Try it.
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
~Maya Angelou

Personal Blog: Madeline's B-Hive
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V M

The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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MadelineB

History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
~Maya Angelou

Personal Blog: Madeline's B-Hive
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alice10

Thanks MadelineB! I am going to try it and see how it does.


Hi V M! Yeah I started watching Candi's videos a while back. I was working on my voice how she said to.
Started transition October 2011
Went fulltime Nov 29 2012
SRS hopefully by 2014



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