What made you unhappy today? v2.0

[Shantel]

Tom,
    Don't give up, keep after it and be innovative!

[Adam (birkin)]

I thought about telling the girl I like today that I have a crush on her. I'm glad I didn't, I looked for the signs, there were none. I don't think as lovely as she is that she's even that bothered about being friends. It makes me feel like absolute cr*p, no one ever likes me. I try so hard to be a good person and it doesn't get me anywhere. Just constantly over looked, why won't they give me a chance? Am I that ugly? Is it really such a huge problem I'm so small. These people don't even know I'm trans and I get no where, with it I don't stand a chance.

Tom. I'm not sure if anything happened to make you think she won't bother being your friend, but you can't let this eat away at your self-esteem like this. Even if she doesn't like you, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you, or that no one will ever like you. You're a really great guy.

[Edge]

Thinking about my childhood and wishing I and everyone had known I was a boy then. Wishing I could have played with the other boys as a boy.

[Jam]

 

Tom,
    Don't give up, keep after it and be innovative!

Well I don't want to give up, but I don't really know...how to get girls lol. I mean I try to appear confident, I hold doors, I try to make them laugh. I don't really know what else to do 
I appreciate the support btw 

Tom. I'm not sure if anything happened to make you think she won't bother being your friend, but you can't let this eat away at your self-esteem like this. Even if she doesn't like you, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you, or that no one will ever like you. You're a really great guy.

To be fair to her she hasn't done anything and she's always really nice to me, it's just that I seek her out. I talk to her first, I make the effort and so far she hasn't appeared to try in return.

[Adam (birkin)]

To be fair to her she hasn't done anything and she's always really nice to me, it's just that I seek her out. I talk to her first, I make the effort and so far she hasn't appeared to try in return.

That doesn't necessarily mean anything. I think people tend to set up patterns of interaction early on. So if you initiated in the beginning, that's sort of how it goes, you know? For example, I usually don't come online until I get a text from Keaira telling me that she has come home. Now, if she's gone for like 3 or 4 hours longer than normal, I might text her saying "I miss you" or something like that, but if it was 1 or 2 hours, I'd not think of it. So if she decided one day to not text me and let me know she was back, I'd just stay offline, because I'd assume she was busy. but it doesn't mean I don't like talking with her, it's just how things happened so that's sort of the unspoken code for how we start talking in the evening if you get what I mean.

So I think if you don't contact this girl when you normally do, she would probably just assume you were busy and would get in touch with her when you wanted to see her.

[Adam (birkin)]

BTW, is your MSN working right now? I tried logging in and it said the service is not responding or something like that.

[Shantel]

To be fair to her she hasn't done anything and she's always really nice to me, it's just that I seek her out. I talk to her first, I make the effort and so far she hasn't appeared to try in return.

Tom,
    When I was a guy and I set my sights on the girl I was in love with, she wouldn't give me the time of day. Back then she wouldn't consider going out with me, used to get exasperated at seeing me when she was with other girls and flip me off. She had a few pet names for me I can't print here, she even attacked and bit me. I think what really drove me on so was the fact that she was aloof and seemingly unapproachable. She was so pretty and classy and presented a challenge that made her even more appealing. I was always sweet to her, tried not to be obnoxious, and was persistent, eventually we married. You can do it Tom, it takes a lot of patient endurance, hang in there!

[Adam (birkin)]

That's a good point, Shantel, but those stories can also have a very unhappy ending. I spent 2.5 years wanting a girl who didn't like me back. She never attacked me or anything like you describe, but she was very cold and rejecting, and she used the fact that I liked her to take advantage of me. It's probably one of the worst things I could have done to myself. She was hot and cold - she'd lift me up for a while, give me hope, then pull me down, rinse and repeat. She actually admitted to doing it on purpose several years after we stopped talking. It took me a good 8 months to fully recover from the heartache. Then I was in a relationship for 3 years, and I carried those insecurities through it, leading me to be cold and distant to my ex until she became lonelier being with me than being without me. I sometimes still pull away from those I love, too, but not as much as I used to. I still can't believe it when people say they like me, I always assume there is some conspiracy and I am somehow being used.

Lol, anyway, we're probably scaring the crap out of Tom with stuff that will never happen to him.

[Shantel]

Unfortunately there are some very manipulative individuals out there, guess the secret is to learn to read body language and be alert for red flags that pop up with the other person's behavior, then listen to your gut which is something I'm getting better at now that I'm older than dirt. Could have used those intuitive skills years ago.

[Jam]

I feel better about the whole thing now I've slept on it. I'm just going to try for a friendship with the expectation of just establishing a friendship. If anything else happens then that's a bonus. I'll just be myself and she can how much she likes that or not.
Thanks for the advise 

[Cindy]

I'm off down the council today to see if I can get a roof over my head, I had threats made a couple of months ago so I moved in with my ex till everything calmed down. Whilst I was away from my rented room my landlord siezed my belongings & illegaly evicted me.
My ex wants me out asap, she can't take me being around her place any longer, hardly a day goes by without some barbed comment about me being trans, she refuses to use my new name & when I pull her up about it she simply says she's using my middle name even though i've told her I hate that name (I only kept it as a middle name because my mum chose it).

So right now i've no job, no home & I can't see any point in anything right now, no matter what I try to do i'll just get kicked whilst i'm down again

Hugs Honey

[Apples Mk.II]

One day we manage to get 12 degrees in the morning, the next one we are back to 20-22...

I have not been able to feel the cold on the street since 2007. I've been wanting to upgrade my winter clothing for a long time, but since I only get to use them for like two days per year, it is not economically worth it...


Damn, I love warm clothes, but not having a winter sucks. With that many air conditioned exhausts in the street, we live in an eternal summer. I haven't left for work with a scarf and a hat for like three years (the last time we got like one hour of snow). Maybe I should migrate to colder climates... Having a T-shirt in december and still sweat is so sad.

[V M]

Went to bed earlier, unfortunately I was awoken to the porcelain goddess demanding my immediate attention 

[justmeinoz]

Snowpaw and Jaime, hang in there. I am still feeling down, but am listing all my good points and trying to keep them in mind.  First one is, I am as stubborn as twelve bastards as the saying goes, and push back twice as hard against criticism, ignorance and rudeness.  Just need to reach some solid ground first.

Karen.

[Shantel]

Went to bed earlier, unfortunately I was awoken to the porcelain goddess demanding my immediate attention 

What is happening to you girlfriend? You seem to be getting it from all sides as of late!

[Edge]

I get the impression that my new friend thinks of me as female even though she knows I'm male and claims to accept that. It's probably nothing, but comments like "Whaaaat? You're a transman who hasn't heard of Revolutionary Girl Utena?" make me wonder. Why would being a man have anything to do with it?

[Jam]

I get the impression that my new friend thinks of me as female even though she knows I'm male and claims to accept that. It's probably nothing, but comments like "Whaaaat? You're a transman who hasn't heard of Revolutionary Girl Utena?" make me wonder. Why would being a man have anything to do with it?

Maybe she's just trying to reinforce it into her own head. If she does think of you as a girl at the moment that may just be her trying to change that thinking to see you as a man.
If that's true then I would personally look at the positive side. She's trying and eventually if she keeps trying, she'll see you as the guy you are.

[Jayne]

I heard from tenancy relations yesterday, my last landlord is refusing to answer their letters or phone calls so on top of being homeless & jobless I now have to embark on a lawsuit!!
My mum isn't returning my calls at the moment, last year she lent/gave my brother £10,000 & this year she wont even return my calls.
I'm staying with my ex who is making my life hell, if a butterfly farts in China & causes a gust of wind to blow her fence over then I swear she'll twist it round to be my fault.

The council have said I have to go back monday for an interview about getting a place but i'm scared I wont be able to get a place where I can have my dog, he's about the only thing I have left now.

The stress of my life crashing around my ears had me running to my GP today in tears, i'm now on sleeping tablets as i've had about 12 hrs sleep all week.

In spite of certain people trying to make my life miserable I will not give up my transition, once i've got a place to live anyone who gives me a hard time will be told to take a hike, I don't need that kind of person in my life any longer

[V M]

Hi Jayne

I do hope you can get into your own place soon and things will start to look up for you

Hugs

[Jayne]

Thanks V M, As long as I get to keep my poopie then i'll be anble to handle anything that life throws at me.
If i'm sick my dog wont leave my side, if i'm sad he wont leave my side, if I wear a dress that doesn't suit me yet my dog will still be at my side.

The better | get to know humanity the more I like my dog

On the bright side, I recieved my new shoes yesterday & as us Bristolians say "They be gert lush" I wore them for about 12 hours & they're as comfy as trainers (but they're wedges), I spent about 3 hours playing guitar hero, standing up & dancing (or a close attempt at dancing), not once did my feet hurt, I luvs my new shoes