Hormones, in terms of emotions, seem to be a bit of a paradox for me. Estrogen made me very emotional, and I'd frequently cry and pour my heart out - BUT, I didn't understand my feelings well and I was often wrong about what was going on because there was a heck of a lot floating around.
On T, I understand my feelings very well, for the most part. BUT I can't find the words to express them. I am trying to write a letter to my family. I am trying to explain my transition so they understand this is a matter of my health. I am also going to press the name issue. I don't expect most of them to use my new name, even though they have known it for years...but I won't answer to my old name anymore. I will correct them every time. I will also no longer attend family functions as female. If they want ME, they can have me, but I am going to make it clear I am no longer playing girl for them.
But writing it out, I just sound like a dick. I have no desire to be all mushy and emotional and sweet, or to sugarcoat anything. I just want to flat out say it. Screw the flowery crap.
