Setting off an alarm in a public lavatory..
I was caught short while out in Central London and so went to one of those public lavatories you put 20p in, you know? Like a Tardis.
So I'm there not long and I'm looking for toilet paper but can't find any, and I'm prodding and poking around and I hit this button thinking it will produce some toilet paper.
That's when the lights went out. Then without any warning this red light comes on, a very loud alarm starts to sound and the door starts to open, and there's me sitting there on the john, long dress hitched up, underwear and tights round my ankles..
Just as I'm realizing that maybe I should have got up the moment I first noticed the door moving I also notice all these tourists and rush hour commuters out in the street looking at me.
Then just I'm thinking 'this can't get any worse' my nerves get the better of me and I fart.. and it's a real Louis Armstrong type which gets amplified by the bowl I'm sitting on.
I kick off my shoes and take the tights off, pick up my shoes and leave the rest behind as I try to walk out the wailing public loo as if thing sort of thing happens to me all the time.
Fortunately at the bus stop there's this group of American tourists I hide behind so I can put my shoes on (got to love Americans).
Then when I get on the bus I realize that I left my shopping in the public loo.