Finally taking the next steps.

[ThatsNotMyName]

Well long story short I came here over the last summer when I first started exploring my longtime gender issues and decided to start taking the first steps to figuring out who I am and whats best for me. Unfortunately I got scared and ran away from the issue yet again but have now once again realized I just can't keep living like this. Most days I can't even bear to even look at myself, I cry all the time, I sleep way too much,  the longer I've gone on the more I have come to loathe most things about my body, and frankly I'm getting to a point where I think about dying an awful lot and think maybe it would be a relief. So I've decided something's got to give. I want to see a therapist and tell my immediate family about what's going on because I just can't take it anymore but I'm also terrified of what lies ahead. I'm also not sure at all how to go about this. Should I tell the family what's going on first or should I see the therapist first? Any advice?

[RedFox]

Congratulations on making a decision to move forward.  I know for me it was very scary to acknowledge what I was and to come out to my family (which I still haven't completely done yet).

I would suggest talking with a gender therapist first - before talking to your family.  Having someone that may be able to help you find some clarity and provide perspective and possible answers will leave you better prepared to properly articulate your situation to your family.  And it will lend credibility to your claim as you can say you are talking with a therapist and are exploring where this will take you.

I had my spouse tell me last night that until I speak with a "proper" therapist she's not going to be convinced that I have a valid problem.  But i won't get started on that!  :/  Just mentioned that as perspective.

Good luck!

[justmeinoz]

Firstly, hello and welcome.  We have all been where you are now and it does get better.
Go easy on yourself, you are starting to work out what the problem is, so now you can start to deal with it.  Bodies can be changed, and that is a major part of transition so try and be patient, hard as it is.
A Gender Therapist can help a lot by helping you to clarify the issues as well as helping with ways to approach your family.

Karen.