Holding doors

[Cindy]

courtesy is the oil of society (I forgot whose quote that is), but is is true. If we treat people with courtesy and politeness it is not genderism it is human. Sadly a species that seems to be dying to be replaced my louts

[Silvermist]

As a feminist, what I find offensive is when people cite holding doors (or any other "old-fashioned" gestures) for women as an example of "female privilege."

I have no problem with people holding doors for each other (and I do it as much as I can), as long as it's done regardless of gender, race, age, or whatever.

[Jamie D]

There is a courtesy of the heart; it is allied to love. From its springs the purest courtesy in the outward behavior.

- Goethe

[big kim]

I hold doors open for anyone,most people still do it were I live

[Cindy]

As a feminist, what I find offensive is when people cite holding doors (or any other "old-fashioned" gestures) for women as an example of "female privilege."

I have no problem with people holding doors for each other (and I do it as much as I can), as long as it's done regardless of gender, race, age, or whatever.

I agree. Courtesy and good manners are genderless. It is a human quality.
That is what is forgotten

[Nygeel]

There are two ways to hold the door open for somebody. The first which is what I do, start to walk in and hold three door while walking. The second is the way that bothers people, seeing somebody walking, stand at the door holding it open then they walk in ahead of you. I only do the second if it's somebody with a stroller or walker where our would take longer to walk in.

[silly by the seashore]

I open doors for anyone and will hold them for someone as well. I just figure its rude to let a door close right in front of someone that wants to go through the same door. It throws some guys off, but they get over it.

[Natkat]

holding doors isnt sexist, holding doors only for women is on the other hand something too piss me off.

I used to get the "ladys first" which made me feel like slamming the door into there head.
If people hold doors in general then its fine, I where actually raised by the school that everyone should do so so its kinda stucked with me.

[unknown]

holding doors isnt sexist, holding doors only for women is on the other hand something too piss me off.

I used to get the "ladys first" which made me feel like slamming the door into there head.
If people hold doors in general then its fine, I where actually raised by the school that everyone should do so so its kinda stucked with me.

That pisses me off too. I'm normally not a violent person, but before I knew I was trans and a guy said that he didn't hit women I would hit him until he hit me back 

[Simon]

That pisses me off too. I'm normally not a violent person, but before I knew I was trans and a guy said that he didn't hit women I would hit him until he hit me back 

What was the point of that? Cis men not hitting women is a good thing. As a transguy if a woman did that and I had no choice/couldn't get away I'd probably spank her instead, lol.

[muffinpants]

What was the point of that? Cis men not hitting women is a good thing. As a transguy if a woman did that and I had no choice/couldn't get away I'd probably spank her instead, lol.

Personally, I think that if someone wants to hit another person, they should be prepared to be hit back. I have never understood the double standard there. Nobody should be hitting anyone else, period.

[Elsa]

Well it's strange cause the other day while I was about to get my laser done - a nurse came in and was struggling with the door since both her hands were full. So I helped her with the door.

However, I got this weird feeling that she really did not like - maybe because I was in boy-mode at the time cause the appointment was just after I was leaving from work.

But it still felt strange for someone to object to it since I consider myself to be girl. But even then both guys and girls open doors for people all the time sometimes it's just a common courtesy

[Simon]

Personally, I think that if someone wants to hit another person, they should be prepared to be hit back. I have never understood the double standard there. Nobody should be hitting anyone else, period.

I'm afraid that anything I say about that will come off as sexist unintentionally, but here goes anyways. Technically speaking testosterone increases muscle mass and strength. Most men are stronger than the majority of women. That goes to reason that a man shouldn't put his hands on a woman simply because of an increased chance that he will do substantial damage.

Then there's the emotional aspect. I for one hate to see a woman cry. A crying woman can get me to agree to just about anything, lol. I think a lot of women now a days see men treating them as if they are fragile as a sign of disrespect. On the contrary I see it as a sign of respect and celebrating their femininity.

If a guy treats you a little different because you're female then enjoy it. If a guy holds doors, pulls out a chair, opens your car door then just appreciate the fact that he cares enough about you to go that extra step.

[muffinpants]

I'm one of those people that hates being treated like a delicate flower. I agree with you that a man shouldn't hit a woman - but I also think that a woman should not hit a man. To me, it is not about how much it will hurt or what kind of damage it will inflict (a woman should think about this first if she is planning on hitting someone), it just seems really disrespectful to hit someone in general. I don't ever let my emotions take over to the point where I can't control my actions anymore. That seems irresponsible and it could have unfortunate consequences. If we want to be treated equally in society, we can't expect to receive special treatment and accommodations for our emotional behaviors.

[unknown]

Lol guys I was 12 when this happened 

@Simon That is just stupid. I really don't get that logic. I even if I was on T I would still be a lot weaker than most women simply because I never work out. I'm pretty sure that most men can control their strength if they fight for fun. Also I was talking about boys in the age of 12. Not much T at this age even thought I will still think the 'I don't hit women' thing is stupid. If it should be something it should be: 'I do not hit anyone.'

@Muffin While I agree you shouldn't hit another person on normal basis it is ok to fight for fun. A lot of guys (and some tomboys I guess) do this. Nothing wrong with that.

[Simon]

@Simon That is just stupid. I really don't get that logic. I even if I was on T I would still be a lot weaker than most women simply because I never work out. I'm pretty sure that most men can control their strength if they fight for fun.

I know a lot of transguys are itty bitty so it probably doesn't pertain to you. Testosterone does increase strength. Why else are cis men typically stronger than women?

I know that personally I would never strike a woman regardless of what she did because I could restrain her instead.

Any man who would hit a woman is not a man.

[FullThrottleMalehem]

I was taught by the parent who raised me that you hold open doors for people, give up a seat for your elders, etc and that has always stuck with me. I hold the door open for people regardless of sex, age, etc, if I see an elderly person needing a seat I'm in I give it up, or regardless of age if the person is tired I'd do the same. I just feel it's common courtesy, maybe not so common anymore but still. Sometimes I get weird looks when I hold the door open for a cis male, a couple have told me to go in first very sternly it was quite odd. Usually though people either ignore it and go on through or smile/say thanks.

[unknown]

I know a lot of transguys are itty bitty so it probably doesn't pertain to you. Testosterone does increase strength. Why else are cis men typically stronger than women?

I know that personally I would never strike a woman regardless of what she did because I could restrain her instead.

Any man who would hit a woman is not a man.

So if a woman is beating the crap out of you and you fight back then you are not a man  . You shouldn't hit anyone regardless of gender. I would defend myself no matter if it was against a man or a woman.

[Simon]

So if a woman is beating the crap out of you and you fight back then you are not a man  . You shouldn't hit anyone regardless of gender. I would defend myself no matter if it was against a man or a woman.

No, I wouldn't hit her back. I would restrain her until she calmed down. It would be just as physically demanding to fight her as to restrain her. It's just about options if something does happen and trust me, no matter if you're a trans man or cis man if you did physically fight a woman and the police were called you would be held liable...so there is that too.

[muffinpants]

No, I wouldn't hit her back. I would restrain her until she calmed down. It would be just as physically demanding to fight her as to restrain her. It's just about options if something does happen and trust me, no matter if you're a trans man or cis man if you did physically fight a woman and the police were called you would be held liable...so there is that too.

The woman would be held liable for domestic violence as well. It's sad that there are so many men that would put up with abuse like that.