First visit to clinic next week!

[Henna]

Just wanted to share good or rather excellent news with all of you.

I got a letter, inviting me to the clinic next week, which diagnoses TS here!!! I'm excited, but extremely nervous at the same time. The invitation came much much quicker than anticipated as some have had to wait for six months.

It's a long road ahead of me, as the diagnose phase here takes _at least_ 6 months, but I'm optimistic that I don't have be in that phase much longer than that. And the good thing would be, that I don't have to be on DIY HRT for that long actually.

But oh my that I got butterflies in my stomach. It literally feels like I'm on trial. This time guilty will give me life and not-guilty is a death sentence.

Hopefully I can relax a bit, otherwise it's going to be a looong year.

[KayCeeDee]

I know how you feel, I was the same going to my first session. What if I'm not really transgender? Will I say the wrong thing? Will I leave something critical out?

What a relief it was to hear the counselor say there was no doubt in her mind that I was, and always have been transgender!

Good luck!

[anya921]

Congrats and good luck girl

[Henna]

First visit to the clinic was yesterday and I feel really crappy and devastated. I got basically told, that I should have treated myself when I was twenty as now it might be too late to expect anything from hormones. I know that's not really the complete truth with hormones, but the age thing is the one and only thing that really bothers me and it's the one thing that cannot be repaired in anyway. I have started to come up to terms with myself, that I just have to do the best out of the remaining years. But now that shrink managed to poke me right into the spot which hurts the most.

Didn't get any work done yesterday, just spend the day crying. Just feel so ->-bleeped-<-ty for that comment. I know I should have done something fifteen years ago. It's not like I haven't gone through that thought over and over again in my mind.

I know the suggestions here are to change the shrink, but unfortunately I cannot do that, as only our public healthcare system has the authorisation to give TS diagnoses and nobody else. And that nasty lady is the one who is sitting in front of the diagnoses.

Just hate our system so much, that I cannot choose a person to whom I would trust.

This system is just giving me more and more reasons to go DIY treatment.

[Cindy]

What absolute crap.

Whoever told you that is full of ignorant ->-bleeped-<-. I started hormones when I was 59. They are working for me. I'm 60 FT and pass without any trouble. I'm a B cup and growing, skin has changed fat distribution has changed, everything is going great

That person is not a therapist in any way. They are ignorant and uninformed and stupid.

OK play the game if they are the only one available, Tell them you want hormonal treatment and go for it. Don't let this ignorant jerk get in your way. Prove them wrong. It is your life. Be proud be strong and be you.

NEVER give in to turkeys like that.

What country are you in?

Hugs Honey and cheer up, you will make it and that person is just dumb.

Hugs 



Cindy

[Henna]

Thank you Cindy for your encouragement. I live in Finland and unfortunately at least here in the capital area, there is no long-term professionality in the trans clinic, as the doctors are rotated in and out of the clinic every six months. They are there just to earn their specialization. Same goes more or less to the nurses. Thus it seems to be a gamble who you get and you normally get at least few different doctors and nurses, as the diagnose phase takes at least six months, mostly closer to a year.

But I'm not giving up. I don't present as a male anymore other than at work and even there I'm in somekind of mixed mode. I've seen how happy I can be, if I'm allowed to be myself. Thus, come hell or highwater, I'm getting the diagnose from our public healthcare system. A system which I've funded too with the taxes.

It just was a comment, which really hurt, especially since I know in my heart that its not true. I've seen people older than me and even older than you transition successfully. I guess ignorant doctors is what you get with tax money 🙂

[kathy bottoms]

Henna:
I know how incredibly stupid some therapists can be.  I had one referral to a therapist who was supposed to be familiar with transgender issues, and I walked out mad and frustrated.  I couldn't believe the psychiatrists office recommended that buffoon, so I searched and called people every day for a month until I was properly referred to a real gender therapist.  Keep looking, but continue seeing this therapist to make sure you don't get left behind. 

Cindy is right. Do what's right for you, and tell the therapist age isn't important.  I started transition at 61.  Yes I'm old, but at least I'm alive again. 

Kathy

[Jamie D]

First visit to the clinic was yesterday and I feel really crappy and devastated. I got basically told, that I should have treated myself when I was twenty as now it might be too late to expect anything from hormones. I know that's not really the complete truth with hormones, but the age thing is the one and only thing that really bothers me and it's the one thing that cannot be repaired in anyway. I have started to come up to terms with myself, that I just have to do the best out of the remaining years. But now that shrink managed to poke me right into the spot which hurts the most.

Henna, let me say this in all sincerity.  Your therapist was out of his or her league.  To say such a thing is factually incorrect.

Like Cindy, and others here who started beyond their twenties, hormones can bring welcome changes in both your physical and emotional outlook.

I was on a low dose for six months - very low dose at first - and it helped me completely changed my outlook.  Cindy can attest to that.  When I first signed up to post, I was depressed and forlorn.  But even on a low dose, and with the help, support, and friendship of the staff and members here, I have done a better job of getting "in touch" with myself.

I think you can progress as far as you want to.  Don't let the naysayers bring you down.