Before I identified as FTM, I had dated girls who had identified as st8 prior and was perfectly comfortable with it. I think I actually saw it as an ego boost that I could "convert" her. Now, however, the feeling is much different.
I'm 10 months on T, passing just fine, but find dating that much more aggravating. I suppose this has all been accelerated by V-day, when I sent a girl I was crushing on flowers at school. She knew me prior to transition and although I know she thinks I'm totally cool- I immediately assume she wont be into me because I'm trans. I feel like this self defeating mentality deters my ability to actually get a date. I sent the flowers anonymously and then planned on telling her. After my best bud gave me ->-bleeped-<- for being into her, I kinda backed down telling her and put it out of mind for a week since I was out of town anyways. When I got back, I told her via text because I hadn't seen her and she thanked me, said they we're beautiful and that I was real sweet. I admitted my crush, if it wasn't already apparent in my note that said, "You're Beautiful. Enjoy," but fell short of asking her out. When I see her I'll gauge her reaction to going out with me, but the whole prospect makes me super anxious. I know girls like confidence and I'm usually very much confident, but I can't help feeling like the trans-factor will be the deciding factor.
How have some of you guys dealt with this? The worse she can say is no, right? I guess I feel like no means, "You're just not male enough."
Thanks in advance for your responses.
