Funny how the two extremes (not saying that in a pejorative way, just that it's apart from the average) are present here. From almost one a week to twice a day or more.
girl you look fierce: Seriously, unless it's -HOT-, heat alone shouldn't be really bad for your skin. I really think you should look for other problems that would dry your skin. It sounds like you'd need a pretty seriously bad skin for it to get dry from just that.
Nyri: Uhm, yeah, I don't use soap whatsoever. It stinks and it's bad for my skin. I try to choose a good non-soapy shower gel and a good face cleanser (still looking for the latter). As for the vulva, I think there are specific cleaners for there. Because if it's anything like my male parts, it would stink bad after just one day of only using water on it. I saw that once, "feminine cleaner". I didn't bother reading the bottle much, but I think it's for down there. And yeah, I think the reason not to use normal cleaners there is that it would damage the vaginal flora, leaving room for more harmful micro-organisms to settle in. Though honestly I haven't been taught much about the hygiene of a vulva, and I don't think I ever will - doesn't sound like a neo-vagina is very vulnerable once healed, since it's just a closed cavity.
Also, tea tree oil... I'm seriously not sure about its anti-dandruff properties. Or did I misunderstand? Because back when my hair was oily (before anti-androgens), I used a "purifying" shampoo with tea tree oil, and all it did was tremendously dry my hair (which was what I wanted). Using it when not needed/too often resulted in my hair being turned into straw. Anyway, it did nothing more than any shampoo on my dandruffs, for which I used T-Gel (coal tar shampoo - smells nasty, but works on dandruff, scalp pimples and yucky-coloured scalp crusts.
If any of these problems I used T-Gel for reminds you of something you're living, here's useful information: I discovered that most if not all of the problem was caused by leaving my hair to dry in the air, and sometimes even sleeping with wet hair. The locked-in humidity made my skin react badly. Since I started using a hair dryed all the time, the only times when those problems resurface and I have to use T-Gel again are when I leave my hair wet for too long.
milktea: I think there's also the important factor of how dirty people get. There are naturally clean people, like my ex-girlfriend, who didn't get particularly smelly, dirty or anything after nearly a week without showering and still had a good breath after 20 hours without brushing their teeth, and then there are naturally dirty people like me, who have bad breath just a few hours after brushing their teeth, have their private parts smell awful 12 hours after a shower and who get yucky pimples on their legs if they skip just a day or two of showering. At least I rarely ever stink of sweat even when sweating a lot. But I think that's mostly thanks to my antisudorific.