I've always been pretty androgynous (in looks and personality). I identified as ftm (and still kind of do) for 4 or 5 years, and have been presenting myself as male for about 3 years. I had been thinking for a couple of months on-and-off, how nice it would be to be happy as a female. I do enjoy feminine things, as well as masculine things. And I wouldn't have to get a surgery to be happy. There are no cures for transsexualism, so it would be likely to stay a dream. But yesterday I suddenly thought "I don't care what people think.". I know that I am male, but I'm feeling more gender neutral now. I might even be able to live as female, but I haven't tried, so I am not sure. Up until yesterday, I felt very strongly that I wanted to be seen as male. But now I don't even care what people see me as. My mom suggested that I want to be seen as male because I don't like the attention females get, and I think this might be true, because I'm not really bothered by being called female, but I am bothered by being treated as a female.
Does anyone else feel like this? Should I be concerned over my sudden semi-gender-neutrality? I still see myself as male, but I don't care if others see me as female. I still mind being treated as a female, though.
Sorry if this is confusing and contradicting. lol I'm pretty confused right now, so that only makes the way I speak more confusing than usual.