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What do you consider passing?

Started by Sydney Greentree, April 05, 2013, 05:22:17 PM

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Sydney Greentree

I consider it being dressed like a woman and not being called 'sir.
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Devlyn

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Anatta

#2
Quote from: Sydney Greentree on April 05, 2013, 05:22:17 PM
I consider it being dressed like a woman and not being called 'sir.

Kia Ora Sydney,

::) A bowel movement ;) ;D

On a more serious note passing means =  "Different strokes for different folks !"

But in general it would seem to be, not being hassled when out and about in public and being referred to by the correct pronoun...

Some don't like the term 'passing' because it makes them feel like they have to 'pass' a test, which in a sense is what really happens-one either passes with flying colours or one fails to pass the test, [A test I might add of ones own making] however at times one might pass and fail at the same time ...

Add on....

What I mean by this is, society may not bat an eyelid and just see you as a run of the mill female/male, but in 'your' mind you still see the old you which makes you feel quite uncomfortable=not up to scratch...After all we are our own worst critic... 

Metta Zenda :)



"The most essential method which includes all other methods is beholding the mind. The mind is the root from which all things grow. If you can understand the mind, everything else is included !"   :icon_yes:
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sylvannus

Not to be mistaken by people who do not know you when presenting as your desired gender.
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StellaB

Someone accepting you for what's inside you and seeing beyond the labels, even at face value.
"The truth within me is more than the reality which surrounds me."
Constantin Stanislavski

Mistakes not only provide opportunities for learning but also make good stories.
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Beth Andrea

When I am comfortable with myself and my presentation.

To paraphrase "the most interesting person in the world": "I don't always pass, but when I do I'm at my happiest."
...I think for most of us it is a futile effort to try and put this genie back in the bottle once she has tasted freedom...

--read in a Tessa James post 1/16/2017
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couch tater

When you can go out and you don't hear some billy bob redneck say "hey Wilma, looky there, them's one of those transgender people like we saw on that tv show!"
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peky

Look...one day many years ago I reached a point where I had nothing to lose, I was tired, and pre-everything...so I just started to dress and act according to the way I felt
I just released my spirit, myself, no more acting, no more playing the role...
I was not interesting in fooling anybody. I was not interested in "passing," I just wanted to be myself and be happy ,...I did not give -and still do not- gave a rat ass about what other people thought or perceived me as...
"Pass" and "passing" is BS..is a "trap" you impose to yourself...do not fell for it
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Darkflame

When I'm out and the majority of people see me as a guy, without questioning or really paying any more attention. It feels worse somehow to have somebody stare at you like they're trying to figure out, than to just be misgendered then move on.
If I let where I'm from burn I can never return

"May those who accept their fate find happiness, those who defy it, glory"
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FrancisAnn

Blending in with each of our areas type women. Dressing & acting as normal as posssible for the women we are around. In my early years I dressed too nice however less is normally better, just dress, look, walk, sit, speak & act as a normal woman within the normal crowd. Mostly just be yourself & relax. No one really knows what might be underneath or cares. Be a confident woman.
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Blaine

I enjoy being labeled as male and when strangers use the correct pronouns, but I'm content with everyone just leaving me alone. If I don't stand out from everyone else, I must be doing something right. Now I get stared at more at home than I do out of the house.
I did my waiting! Twelve years of it! In [my head!] Azkaban!
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Berti_in_Ba

To me it is being able to go about my life living as a normal woman without fear of being "outed or ridiculed".  I hope this helps hun.

Berti
MTF progressing towards her final stages of transition. Next up is my facial and body surgery; then my final transition to being a total woman! Been a long & hard fought journey but in the end, it has definately been worth the wait  ;D[/left]

Nature chooses who will be transgender
individuals don't choose this.
~ Mercedes
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StellaB

Quote from: peky on April 05, 2013, 07:16:24 PM

"Pass" and "passing" is BS..is a "trap" you impose to yourself...do not fell for it

QFT
"The truth within me is more than the reality which surrounds me."
Constantin Stanislavski

Mistakes not only provide opportunities for learning but also make good stories.
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Cindy

I think the only answer it is when you never think of passing.

I'm a woman who lives her life and I do not need acceptance or applause from anyone.

Passing? Passing what?
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Tristan

to me it means getting called miss or getting hit on by guys
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suzifrommd

To me passing is when people cannot tell I wasn't born a woman.

I'll draw a contrast to some of the other posters - I don't think passing refers to how you feel. I can feel totally natural and not think about it, but also not pass - every who sees me can tell I was male bodied.

However, there are degrees of passing. You can pass in casual contact (most people walking by don't see anything out of the ordinary) or you can pass as stealth (nearly impossible for someone to notice your birth circumstances).

However, given this definition, I think passing is given WAY WAY WAY too much importance by a lot of people in this community. I know many women who do not pass and yet are very happy with their transitions.

And you do not need to pass to be treated as a woman. You just need to avoid and ignore narrow-minded people and bigots.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Tristan

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 06, 2013, 12:44:41 PM
To me passing is when people cannot tell I wasn't born a woman.

I'll draw a contrast to some of the other posters - I don't think passing refers to how you feel. I can feel totally natural and not think about it, but also not pass - every who sees me can tell I was male bodied.

However, there are degrees of passing. You can pass in casual contact (most people walking by don't see anything out of the ordinary) or you can pass as stealth (nearly impossible for someone to notice your birth circumstances).

However, given this definition, I think passing is given WAY WAY WAY too much importance by a lot of people in this community. I know many women who do not pass and yet are very happy with their transitions.

And you do not need to pass to be treated as a woman. You just need to avoid and ignore narrow-minded people and bigots.
i agree alot with the first half of what you said. but about the not passing thing i know i would not have been able to keep my job or get my second one had i not passed. sadly enough i know the hospital would not allow me to work in it if i made patients feel un comfortable.   :( 
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Madison_dawn

i dont like seeing it as passing as in reality im just living, im not taking a final exam. Yeah there is times people i notice give me a second glance and then go on their way but heck i do that too. Seeing if the guy is hot or the girl is a real meanie. You just have to feel yourself and work at it. Id say its not passing really but  Blending yeah i like blending better than passing.
HRT August 7 2012
Full time January 1 2013
Documents changed March 20 2013
SRS Soon
https://www.facebook.com/madison.dawnrhodes
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eli77

To me passing doesn't mean passing as a woman, it means passing as cis. To be stealth, it can't be "nearly impossible" for someone to read you as trans, it has to be actually impossible.

I feel like it's a way of reclaiming control over my body and how my body is perceived. Of having the freedom to choose who does and does not know my history. Of having agency.
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WorkerBeast

Passing is when there is no doubt in the minds of your audience that you are who you say you are. The thing that I am understanding more and more is that when you convince yourself everyone else is convinced. Not to suggest that conforming physically is not a good idea but people can feel insecurity.   :)
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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