TS Admirers - What makes 'em tick?

[Kate]

Would I be with another transsexual in the future? Who knows. It wouldn't be like I was specifically looking for one. People are people, right?

Awl TWC, you're definately not a TS ->-bleeped-<-. Like you say, I assume TS ->-bleeped-<-s specifically look for TSs for whatever reasons, sexual or otherwise.

For what it's worth, one of my online friends is very much interested in "ladyboys," which I guess is similar? And this person is one of the sweetest people I know. Nothing "creepy" about them at all.

On the other hand, I've IM'd with some people who totally weirded me out, completely focused on sex and in a very dark, scary way. I try and talk with them about themselves, and just get back one-word answers... and it feels like they're just STARING at me through the screen with this predatory patience, trying to lure me into their trap... THAT's creepy.

~Kate~

[Keira]

We live in a cynical world TWC and TS are often NOT seen as humans, because of that, the lovely souls that would be open to date a pre-op TS are not let the chance to express their feelings.

I think, the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- label comes from men (mostly) going into places where pre-op TS are known to be and specifically targetting them on the internet or in gay clubs. Knowing men... How sex is a driving force in them and that many don't want to be seen as gay for whatever reason and like the plausible deniability we offer.

Unless someone is unpassable, I don't think there is a big chance of randomly meeting a T-->-bleeped-<- on the street. So, if you meet somebody there, you tell your "big secret" and they shrug it off, there is a good chance they like you for you, not because of the dangling bits...

[Jeannette]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

[seldom]

We live in a cynical world TWC and TS are often NOT seen as humans, because of that, the lovely souls that would be open to date a pre-op TS are not let the chance to express their feelings.

I think, the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- label comes from men (mostly) going into places where pre-op TS are known to be and specifically targetting them on the internet or in gay clubs. Knowing men... How sex is a driving force in them and that many don't want to be seen as gay for whatever reason and like the plausible deniability we offer.

Unless someone is unpassable, I don't think there is a big chance of randomly meeting a T-->-bleeped-<- on the street. So, if you meet somebody there, you tell your "big secret" and they shrug it off, there is a good chance they like you for you, not because of the dangling bits...

There is a big difference between people who are open minded for whatever reason, and those who are specifically ->-bleeped-<-s.  There are open minded folks out there (togetherswan is one of them) who fall in love with the person not the parts. 

[HelenW]

Maybe we should define just what this *->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-* person is...

I am in love with a transsexual, I did not know in advance that she was a transsexual, my desire for her is the same as before I knew. Would I be with another transsexual in the future? Who knows. It wouldn't be like I was specifically looking for one. People are people, right?
Can a person desire another person with honest intent and feeling without it being labeled as something else?

I think that's a good point, TWC.  I used the word "admirer" without defining it because I wasn't sure of what the definition is.  I wanted to see how others defined the term.  And I perfectly agree that the motivations of the person who looks for relationships with a trans person is key to that definition.

I suggest that the term, "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-" has the same kind of negative connotations that the term "she-male" often has and that an "admirer" is someone who respects and truly appreciates the things a trans person can bring to a romantic relationship so they seek out trans people specifically.  Going further then, I propose that an "ally" would be someone who accepts trans people and supports their desire to live as they want but does not have any romantic inclination towards them.

The term I would use for a person who falls in love with another human only to find out they are trans after the love has grown and then continues to love and support that person?  I would use the word "Angel"  but I think "SO" is easier to type. 

hugs & smiles
helen

[Renae.Lupini]

This is an interesting thread for me. I think that regardless of their tastes, men are either good to be with or complete jackasses. Just because a guy likes TS women doesn't automatically make him a creep like so many of us are quick to assume. When they are overtly perverted and come on way too strong then they are creeps. It is my opinion that many of us dismiss "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s" on the premise that they actually accept us as TS women. To some people that less than validates their self-image on personal femininity and therefore causes a self-defense reaction of "What a f'n jerk?!?" when it comes to these guys. Could this be why when a "straight" guy falls for one us he is not as creepy as the "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-"? I have had plenty of straight men say some off the wall stuff concerning their affection towards me. The creepy thing is a "guy" thing period. Most of them can't help themselves as it is not only born into them but usually encouraged.

Most of us weren't ever on the receiving end of cat calls and locker room humor until wee chose to live in our preferred gender roles. All the crazy stuff men say to us is the same stuff they say to natural women as well. It isn't a matter of avoiding "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s" as much as it is avoiding jackasses altogether.

[Doc]

It isn't a matter of avoiding "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s" as much as it is avoiding jackasses altogether.

Bravo.

[tinkerbell]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

[RebeccaFog]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

   Oh No. What if it turns out to be a legitimate sexual preference? Then we'll have people fighting for their rights to be ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.  Since they're not Gay, not straight, but maybe Gay or Maybe straight, they'll call themselves May and will demand we put the 'M' in LGBT.   >

[Renae.Lupini]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

   Oh No. What if it turns out to be a legitimate sexual preference? Then we'll have people fighting for their rights to be ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.  Since they're not Gay, not straight, but maybe Gay or Maybe straight, they'll call themselves May and will demand we put the 'M' in LGBT.   >

Since they do view themselves as straight men, we don't need to worry about them having their own pride parades anytime soon.

[Kate]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

   Oh No. What if it turns out to be a legitimate sexual preference? Then we'll have people fighting for their rights to be ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.  Since they're not Gay, not straight, but maybe Gay or Maybe straight, they'll call themselves May and will demand we put the 'M' in LGBT.   >

I dunno, I'm uncomfortable calling anyone's behaviour "disgusting" and poking fun of them just because they're different than me. I'm sure some of them are real jerks, but some TSs and CDrs are too. I don't know if it necessarily correlates with being a "->-bleeped-<-." People have all sorts of kinks... I mean if you think about it, it's really not ALL that different than heterosexual men who get turned on wearing women's clothes. There's that taboo, that exotic contradiction that seems to be arousing. And as long as no one is getting hurt, physically or emotionally, then so what?

It's ashame, I'd really love to hear from people who feel this way... try to learn something... but I doubt anyone would dare admit it here for fear of being "disgusting" and "creepy."

~Kate~

[Jeannette]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

Exactly.  There's nothing wrong in a man who is attracted to a MTF transsexual, but when this attraction focuses exclusively on the incongruity between the genitals and body of the transsexual person, then it becomes kinky and disgusting.

[Renae.Lupini]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who gets aroused by the presence of male and female sex characteristics (breasts and penises for instance) in a kinky way.

I have to agree with Jeannette here.  Almost all "->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s" get their sexual kicks by being aroused by the presence of male genitals (i.e, penis, testicles) in a female body (i.e, soft, hairless skin, breasts,).  Just kinky, disgusting behavior IMO.

tink

   Oh No. What if it turns out to be a legitimate sexual preference? Then we'll have people fighting for their rights to be ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.  Since they're not Gay, not straight, but maybe Gay or Maybe straight, they'll call themselves May and will demand we put the 'M' in LGBT.   >

I dunno, I'm uncomfortable calling anyone's behaviour "disgusting" and poking fun of them just because they're different than me. I'm sure some of them are real jerks, but some TSs and CDrs are too. I don't know if it necessarily correlates with being a "->-bleeped-<-." People have all sorts of kinks... I mean if you think about it, it's really not ALL that different than heterosexual men who get turned on wearing women's clothes. There's that taboo, that exotic contradiction that seems to be arousing. And as long as no one is getting hurt, physically or emotionally, then so what?

It's ashame, I'd really love to hear from people who feel this way... try to learn something... but I doubt anyone would dare admit it here for fear of being "disgusting" and "creepy."

~Kate~

Kate, you are awesome. I <3 U lol

[Suzy]

Well I think there is a real difference between "admirers" and "->-bleeped-<-s."  I've only have experience with the ->-bleeped-<-s.  Honestly, they make me sick, as if they get off on something they consider abnormal.  I don't consider myself a freak.  And, my (limited) experience with them is that they are intentionally obnoxious and think I should like it, since I'm such a freak of nature.

But, an admirer would be something nice.  If someone liked me for who I am, and could care less about my being M2F, and just admired ME, that would be awesome.

Kristi

[Renae.Lupini]

Well I think there is a real difference between "admirers" and "->-bleeped-<-s."  I've only have experience with the ->-bleeped-<-s.  Honestly, they make me sick, as if they get off on something they consider abnormal.  I don't consider myself a freak.  And, my (limited) experience with them is that they are intentionally obnoxious and think I should like it, since I'm such a freak of nature.

But, an admirer would be something nice.  If someone liked me for who I am, and could care less about my being M2F, and just admired ME, that would be awesome.

Kristi

Most of the time it has nothing to do with the fact that we are TS or GG. A lot of men have no idea how to talk to women in a romantic sexual way without coming off as totally creepy. It isn't that they are all jackasses but it is a good indicator that they aren't mature enough for a real relationship. This is just how most men are towards women regardless of what is their panties.

[katia]

Exactly.  There's nothing wrong in a man who is attracted to a MTF transsexual, but when this attraction focuses exclusively on the incongruity between the genitals and body of the transsexual person, then it becomes kinky and disgusting.

i didn't concord with you on the philosophy thread, yet i wholeheartedly agree with you on this one.

[Yvonne]

A ->-bleeped-<- is not an admirer.  A ->-bleeped-<-, as described by some girls here, is a weird, creepy guy.

[Pica Pica]

Men who chase are always creepy... You go for a drink and all they want to talk about is girls they 'had', or 'gave one' to. Now I don't want to have anyone or give anything, I want to share - and if that includes bodily fluids and funny noises all the better; but anything that's not a two player game is no fun. (unless it's a three player game? ) (Shut up self, you're embarrassing me.)

[The Middle Way]

A ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who themselves have a repressed sexual fantasies of being in a submissive role, at least 90% are that way. 

That is so not how it appears to work in my neighborhood. These appear to be regular men (or the occasional masculine dyke) who either are nearsighted, or my whole presentation is close enough for rock and roll for them. It's quite hilarious to find this behavior coming my way after - how many centuries of - 'being male'.

Also in my experience: my first real girlfriend turned out to quite like, among other things, the manifestation of both types of secondary sexual characteristics in a person. She was 100% dominant, no switching...

I wonder if it occurs as a primary preference, I have no idea on that.

tmw

[katia]

Men who chase are always creepy...

period.