How did you decide on your name?

[Nyri]

How did you come up with your guy name? 

I have a dilemma.  I actually really like my birthname, and it is a unisex name, but there aren't as many men using the name in the United States as there are women, so a lot of people see it as a girl name.  I won't mind having a name like that once I am passing as a guy (at least that is what I think now...) but for now, I'd rather have a more masculine name.  Whatever name I choose will take the place of my middle name once I'm at a place where I can legally change it, but I don't know how to pick a name for myself.  There are names I like, but I don't know if they fit me or not.  I kind of wish I had a group of friends that I could use to try out names with to see if they feel right.  It's one thing having people use a name over the internet, and a completely different thing having it actually used out loud. 

[Simon]

I was having issues picking a name (driving everyone nuts in the process too) so I wrote a list of names I liked and my mom chose my first name. I had to have something to get it legal so that was the route I took. It made my mom feel better about everything too because she felt as if she had a bit of control in the situation.

My middle name (Vincent) I chose because I liked how it flowed with Simon. My last name I changed honestly as a snub to my father who wasn't a very nice person and also told me he would never accept me as a man. Ok, fine and dandy...I'm not passing on your name then (he had no other sons to do so).

Picking a name is tricky for some guys. Just think of what names you like and which ones you can picture yourself living with for the rest of your life. It is a bit weird at first being called something other than your birth name just because habit dictates the name a person responds to. Luckily my birth name wasn't typical so I never had to hear it much again. If you like your gender neutral birth name then stick with it. There are men named Ashley, Kelly, Casey, Cary, etc. It's whatever makes you comfortable.

[democration]

I'm in the same boat. My birthname is Haley--and it's way more common for females than males, but it is technically unisex. Haley Joel Osment is the only famous name that comes to mind. I'm not planning on changing it largely because my family doesn't want me to, and because I haven't found anything else that really fits. I generally go by Hal, but my family and a few friends still use Haley, and it doesn't really bother me. I suppose it works out that I've actually always really liked guys with feminine names like Ashley, Shelby, etc.

Unfortunately, I'm completely at a loss for middle names. I do want to change that, because mine is blatantly female, and I feel like that'll just be strange for people taking my ID later on. It's really difficult to find names that sound decent and male following Haley, though. :-P

[Simon]

I'm in the same boat. My birthname is Haley--and it's way more common for females than males, but it is technically unisex.

Not saying you should change your name but I went to school with a guy named Haylon. Just thought of it as a more masculine form of Haley.

[Nero]

If you like your gender neutral birth name then stick with it. There are men named Ashley, Kelly, Casey, Cary, etc. It's whatever makes you comfortable.

Yeah, I think a unisex name would only be an issue early in transition. Luckily for most trans men, we usually end up passing flawlessly given enough time on T. When I meet a guy named Kelly, I do initially do a double take, but then remember it's a guys' name as well. If you look like a guy, people will just take it at face value.

[democration]

Not saying you should change your name but I went to school with a guy named Haylon. Just thought of it as a more masculine form of Haley.

Oh, that's actually a really cool name. I've never heard it before. :-)

[Edge]

I was given a unisex name too. The only reason I'm changing it is because I have to change my middle name anyway (my first name is going to be my new middle name).
The name I picked was suggested to me. I also made a list of names I liked, asked for advice, and went with the one I liked the best.
The name Hal reminds me of Hal from Being Human. Cool.

[Nyri]

Wow, okay.  I feel a little better for not completely hating my birthname.  Thank you for the replies  

I think for me, it really is only going to matter early in my transition, and fortunately (and unfortunately) it's not like I'm going to legally change my name right away, so if later on I decide I actually don't want to use my birth name for my first or middle name, there's time for me to realize that. 

Now... I really do need to change my middle and last name, so I do want to figure those out soon, even though it won't be legal for a while.  I'd like to get used to it soon.  I think the last name will be even harder than the other... Edge, I'm kind of thinking of using my current first name as a middle name, also and coming up with a new first instead of middle, but I'm really not sure yet. 

My name is Erin (not sure why I didn't say that before).  It could be changed to Aaron, but I really don't want a "biblical" name and am a fan of Ireland, so I'd rather not change the spelling. 

[Simon]

My name is Erin (not sure why I didn't say that before).  It could be changed to Aaron, but I really don't want a "biblical" name and am a fan of Ireland, so I'd rather not change the spelling.

You could always pick a different spelling that you like, something like Errin or Eryn if you didn't want to keep the original spelling and don't like Aaron.

Take your sweet time with it. I really miss being able to pick a name. I thought it was the fun part of transition...especially since I always hated my birth name.

[Nero]

Wow, okay.  I feel a little better for not completely hating my birthname.  Thank you for the replies  

I think for me, it really is only going to matter early in my transition, and fortunately (and unfortunately) it's not like I'm going to legally change my name right away, so if later on I decide I actually don't want to use my birth name for my first or middle name, there's time for me to realize that. 

Now... I really do need to change my middle and last name, so I do want to figure those out soon, even though it won't be legal for a while.  I'd like to get used to it soon.  I think the last name will be even harder than the other... Edge, I'm kind of thinking of using my current first name as a middle name, also and coming up with a new first instead of middle, but I'm really not sure yet. 

My name is Erin (not sure why I didn't say that before).  It could be changed to Aaron, but I really don't want a "biblical" name and am a fan of Ireland, so I'd rather not change the spelling.

The benefit with Aaron/Erin is it's used more for guys than girls. But I fear you will run into problems with the spelling. If people read your name 'Erin', they are going to assume female.

[Nyri]

Yeah, that is the problem here... not many people with the Erin spelling are male... there are some, but really not enough for people to not just assume female by seeing it.  That's why until I am passing I'd like something else to go by... and have that be my second name once it's changed, also.  Seeing Erin William or something like that, I'd assume it was a guy, because what girl is named William?  I am planning on whatever my other name is being one that is typically used by males only.  Also, once I'm passing, I don't really care if people think I'm a girl by seeing my name as long as that notion goes away once they actually see me

I kind of like Eryn, but that feels even more feminine to me.  Aeron, maybe?  For now though I'm sticking with the current spelling.  I can always change my mind later. 

[natastic]

I know it's perhaps an anomaly,  but my best friend growing up was a guy named Erin, and to my knowledge the spelling of his name has never caused him any grief whatsoever.  And of course I'm biased from that friendship but I think Erin is a totally rad name for a guy.

[Nyri]

I know it's perhaps an anomaly,  but my best friend growing up was a guy named Erin, and to my knowledge the spelling of his name has never caused him any grief whatsoever.  And of course I'm biased from that friendship but I think Erin is a totally rad name for a guy.

I think it's a good guy name, and know a couple of guys with the name, it's just uncommon to the point where more people will assume that it is attached to a female unless the person with the name is sitting right in front of them and obviously male.  It's awesome to know that your friend hasn't had any problem with the name.  I don't think I would either if I passed as a male, which is why I want to keep it.

[Liminal Stranger]

Long story short, mine picked me XD Has nothing to do with my birth name, which I enjoy about it. I may keep the middle, but do want to change my last name because it's not so common and I don't want my family finding me out of the blue.

Though even with said feminine name, I can pass somehow. Sometimes guys have feminine names. If you want to change yours, go for it, but if you like the name you've got I say stick with it. Erin's a pretty awesome name IMO.

[randomroads]

I have no idea why I chose the two names Benjamin Jacob. Maybe I put them together because of the biblical story. Perhaps it's because my grandfather's name was Jacob and my great uncle's name was Benjamin.

Either way my parents are going to hate my chosen name but it fits me perfectly.

[Nicole]

I asked my mother to help.
Birth name was Nick or Nicolas.

She said that if I was born a girl it was going to be Nicole.

I don't have a middle name, never did so why start with a name change?

[charlie85]

I chose my first name Charlie because a friend called me Charlie Brown a lot and it just seemed to fit. My best friend and I kept trying out names but nothing worked then one night I said Charlie and instantly that friend was like that is it, so I went with it.

I chose Aidan as my middle name because I liked it along with Charlie. I later added Xavier to the end because my family tends to have longer names, I may keep it just as a middle name or I might leave it as my last name I haven't decided.

So my name when I go for my hearing in September is Charlie Aidan Xavier, and for me it is just completely fitting and I love my name.

After the fact like months later I realized I have family members named Charles which I was thinking of changing it to but going by Charlie, but I decided to just legally change it to Charlie as I don't want the association with family members having that name.

[Dante]

I had a really hard time picking a name for a long time, but everyone always called me by my birth name anyway so I never really had one that felt permanent. One day my friend basically told me "I'm sick of calling you by a name that doesn't suit you, you're picking a name now." I listed out some names to her and my other friends that I liked and we kinda went through and decided which one we all thought suited me. Dante was the final choice that we all agreed on, and I'm really happy she did that otherwise I'd probably still be going by my birth name. But the name really feels like it's mine now and I don't have any regrets about it other than people thinking I named myself after the main character of Devil May Cry. But oh well! I like the name and I'm keeping it!

As for why I like the name, there's several reasons, some of them simply superficial (Dante is such a nice combination of sounds and such a nice spelling), but the one reason I really like it is that its Latin root "Durans" means "enduring," and remembering that has given me hope many times when I felt really down.

[Simon]

I don't have any regrets about it other than people thinking I named myself after the main character of Devil May Cry. But oh well! I like the name and I'm keeping it!

I thought you borrowed it from the book "Dante's Inferno".

Don't feel bad. I'm starting to believe I am the only man in the Southern United States called Simon. I get asked about it sometimes, "Are your parents British?".  I just smile and say, "No, my mom is very religious and named me after Simon Peter in the Bible". That always satisfies their curiosity. Think of a reason like that for the future in case you need it. Dante is a cool name but highly unusual. People are going to ask how you got it.

[Dante]

I thought you borrowed it from the book "Dante's Inferno".

Don't feel bad. I'm starting to believe I am the only man in the Southern United States called Simon. I get asked about it sometimes, "Are your parents British?".  I just smile and say, "No, my mom is very religious and named me after Simon Peter in the Bible". That always satisfies their curiosity. Think of a reason like that for the future in case you need it. Dante is a cool name but highly unusual. People are going to ask how you got it.

That would be first inclination as well, considering I've actually read The Divine Comedy. Dante Alighieri, who wrote it, was the one who made the name popular anyway. I didn't really choose the name after him either but I think it would make more sense to think that than to think I named myself after a video game. I dunno, people are strange.

That's funny, and good call coming up with an explanation! People sometimes wonder about it (I don't really pass though so they're more likely to ask why I chose it than why my parents named me that), but my sister's name is made up, being a compound of two names, so really I have a normal name in comparison to hers! When I actually start passing I'll probably just say that my parents had normal names and wanted their kids to have more interesting ones... I can use my sister's name as "proof."