I say only fairly happy, but it does cause me alot of real life problems. I dont like it first of all doesnt feel right, but I mean Its been 14 yrs since I went full time and there is still no surgery in my future
It mostly has caused problems with boyfriends. I tend to be attracted to (and, attract) straight guys who dont have a thing for transsexuals. They do tend to be open minded, free thinkers, and usually give it a shot, but in the end, Im pretty sure its my pre-op state that drives them away. My first boyfriend at 22 (I waited some years after going fulltime to date anyone) didnt know I was transsexual. It was very hard to tell him, but he ended up 'giving it a shot' with me, ultimately it did drive him away. At some point in my late 20's I stoped being 'stealth' I didnt tell everyone, but I was a bit more loud about at least saying I was genderqueer in some way.
Currently Ive been sticking to bisexual males. The current guy I am dating is openly bisexual. Its a huge relief in some ways, and in other ways, well I know he's sexually attracted to it. It doesnt bother me most times, because he never ever asks me to do anything I dont want. He's rather respectful, and hasnt treated me any different than he would probably treat a cis-gendered woman.
I have had experiences and relationships with women sometimes rather rewarding and long. Usually lesbians, occasionally bisexual women. I feel the only reason I even bothered though, was because they seemed to deal with it much better. My transsexual status has never driven away a woman.
After I dumped a long time female lover mid last year, I have deffiently gone back to men. The first one was a straight guy, who at first was cool, but ultimately he even told me straight up that is why he couldnt be with me. I asked him if I was post-op if it would change anything, and he ho;d and hum'd about it, but really told me the main reason was I couldnt have children. So on the other hand, I dont feel too bad, cuz even if I could have children, I wouldnt.
