Part time

[Riley Skye]

So I was talking to my therapist last night about how I want to finally being recognized as Julie and she said I should start going part time. My only problem is that I'm not even at that awkward stage where people are questioning my gender yet so I'll definitely have to make an effort to be perceived as female. I'm starting to think of ways I can start going part time, goal is to really do it around friends and family and to just start testing the waters.

[LordKAT]

Just a suggestion but, if you have a loyal honest friend, ask them to help choose some outfits for you. It will be less of a shock to see you dressed when they helped you to get there and you won't be alone walking into a room of people for the first time.

[Heather]

Now is the perfect time to start presenting yourself as Julie. Going out as yourself even when don't pass can be very rewarding. Waiting till you pass is a bad idea because the more you go out as yourself even when you don't pass the more you learn as far as how you present yourself. Yeah it can be a bit embarrassing but it forces you to learn how to do makeup and what clothes work and what don't.
I would hate too know where I would be at now had I just started presenting myself this far into transition. Yeah I got some embarrassing pictures that will never see the light of day but when I look back at those early pics of me they show me how far I've come. I have to look at my life right now as like a teenage girl everything I do even the embarrassing fashion mistakes are helping me learn to be the woman I will eventually become.

[Riley Skye]

So I'm making it my goal to within a month to go part time, now indeed it is a perfect time especially when tmy friends, who will be helping me, are finally out of school. Now today I'm going to talk to my friends and tell them my goals this coming summer, how I want to start going part time, really full time around them for the most part. Also start to reinforce using my chosen name and proper pronouns, I know how awkward or hard it is because I have a trans friend whom I've known for years well before he started to. Heather as you said it is a perfect time to start doing this especially now that school's out and we have time!

[Heather]

So I'm making it my goal to within a month to go part time, now indeed it is a perfect time especially when tmy friends, who will be helping me, are finally out of school. Now today I'm going to talk to my friends and tell them my goals this coming summer, how I want to start going part time, really full time around them for the most part. Also start to reinforce using my chosen name and proper pronouns, I know how awkward or hard it is because I have a trans friend whom I've known for years well before he started to. Heather as you said it is a perfect time to start doing this especially now that school's out and we have time!

I'm Happy for you Julia! Once you start presenting as yourself its going to be hard to ever go back to presenting yourself as a guy.

[Misato]

My recommendation for this is go catch a movie.  Very brief interaction with the general public then you're sitting in the dark for an hour and a half, two hours.  But you are still out there.

It can be uncomfortable at times but I do think doing some part time living is important.  Yes it's anecdotal, but for me proving that I could function in life being seen as a transwoman was crucial in enabling me to go full time.  Sure there were problems and clockings, but learning what I was setup to gain by transition helped give me the confidence I needed.

Good luck and all the best!

[Riley Skye]

well I have been sporadically going out in public dressed in womens clothes, I'm comfortable with it but I just don't have much. For me I gotta get more clothes and some accessories to help and learning the way of the girl from my friends, picking up their mannerisms, learning to do my make up and such. Just over all I need to start living as me more often. And Heather honestly you're riight, the more I find myself presenting the part the less I want to present male.

[Olivia-Anne]

My recommendation for this is go catch a movie.  Very brief interaction with the general public then you're sitting in the dark for an hour and a half, two hours.  But you are still out there.

It can be uncomfortable at times but I do think doing some part time living is important.  Yes it's anecdotal, but for me proving that I could function in life being seen as a transwoman was crucial in enabling me to go full time.  Sure there were problems and clockings, but learning what I was setup to gain by transition helped give me the confidence I needed.

Good luck and all the best!

I guess I'm not the only one that started out that way. I've been in a quasi "part time" mode off and on for over a decade. But when I very first started thats what I did. I look back at those times and know I was a hot mess. But I had no friends that knew or anything. Nor could I have even told them about it. At that time for me it was almost a compulson that I had to do something about, just to feel normal. I think it really helped me to get comfortable. Especially because the time that takes helps you to get past the "omg I'm out in public" feeling.

By far though, the most progress was when I started going out with a very dear friend of mine, as myself. I would go over to her house and she would help me get ready. I.E. fix my makeup if I messed up. Give me pointers on makeup or hair. She would veto any outfits that were innapropiate or ill fitting or badly accesorized. Very exciting times ahead for sure. Good Luck!

<3 Liv

[Riley Skye]

The thing is I've been living as me for thpast half year finally. Its that I need to start living more as a woman and less as a man. For me it'll be a gradual process and I can't yet go full time because I'm both not fully comfortable and my body has yet to start developing much so far. Its a matter of really to start testing the waters and being more comfortable with people outside my group of friend.

[JoanneB]

I never had an awkward period and never will thanks to MPB hitting me at age 14. So don't let that stop you.

I've been doing part time for well over 2 years now. My first public daytime outings were to the therapist. In no time my morning appointment turned into an extended shopping day. Within a couple of months most weekends were spent as Joanne as well as many evenings when time allowed.

That experienced showed me just how much joy and happiness I can feel. Something I had slowly lost over decades. I also achieved my life long dream of being seen as and accepted as a woman.

Doing the part time thing is emotionally gruelling. Most Sunday nights I'd be in tears as the nail polish HAD to come off till the following weekend. But for now part-time is still my only viable option.

[Riley Skye]

Thanks, ever since I came out to myself I started living as my true self. Even though I still do dress and present myself male doesn't make me any less of me. Right now it doesn't matter how I dress because I know I'm me and soon the changes will be coming and I will reap the awards of transition. Just gotta take it one step at a time.

[Joanna Dark]

Have you considered dressing androgynously? This way you won't be dressed male but not explicitly female either. So anyone you are not comfortable being out to for whatever reason won't be able to say anything. Plus you will have the satisfaction of being dressed in a style more towards your true gender. It's really quite liberating. I wear all women's clothes and discreet makeup and no one ever says anything ever or gives me any weird looks. Well guys smile at me a lot and hit on me so that's awesome. But I could still deny it if I wanted too. I don't consider myself full-time but maybe I am fooling myself.

[kyh]

Have you considered dressing androgynously? This way you won't be dressed male but not explicitly female either. So anyone you are not comfortable being out to for whatever reason won't be able to say anything. Plus you will have the satisfaction of being dressed in a style more towards your true gender. It's really quite liberating. I wear all women's clothes and discreet makeup and no one ever says anything ever or gives me any weird looks. Well guys smile at me a lot and hit on me so that's awesome. But I could still deny it if I wanted too. I don't consider myself full-time but maybe I am fooling myself.

If you're at the point where guys smile at you and hit on you, I'm pretty sure you pass

I think you're fooling yourself into thinking you're not full time, gorgeous! Heehee ^_^

[Joanna Dark]

If you're at the point where guys smile at you and hit on you, I'm pretty sure you pass

I think you're fooling yourself into thinking you're not full time, gorgeous! Heehee ^_^

Maybe lol Idk I don't feel like I pass but everytime I'm out guys smile at me and strike up conversations with me and say things like it was a pleasure talking to you and they hope they see me again and that never happened before so yeah I am passing. It seems strange cause I kinda see it but not fully. I think the OP strictly likes women so I don't know how she will feel about getting hit on but she should consider that once she goes full-time she will get hit on. She is going to be cutecutecute.

[kyh]

Maybe lol Idk I don't feel like I pass but everytime I'm out guys smile at me and strike up conversations with me and say things like it was a pleasure talking to you and they hope they see me again and that never happened before so yeah I am passing. It seems strange cause I kinda see it but not fully. I think the OP strictly likes women so I don't know how she will feel about getting hit on but she should consider that once she goes full-time she will get hit on. She is going to be cutecutecute.

Yes, that is something to be wary of, Julia! Once you become super beautiful (and you will), you'll have to fend off guys everywhere you go like Joanna.

Darn... I want to be hit on too! Give me some of your cuteness girl!

[Riley Skye]

Yes, that is something to be wary of, Julia! Once you become super beautiful (and you will), you'll have to fend off guys everywhere you go like Joanna.

Darn... I want to be hit on too! Give me some of your cuteness girl!

Lol I wouldn't know how to handle myself then. I am bi with a preference to girls but wouldn't mind being with a guy if push can to shove. It'll be the day once I'm able to pass