Diverse sexuality of trans persons.. what would be the best way to explain?

[Father Way]

How would you explain that we have diverse sexuality too? Some reason most people simply assume trans folks are heterosexual or have to be.

[Bookworm]

Well there is this video on youtube I would show people. I don't know if showing the link will go against policy though. I do not own the video, but it explains it like to different spectrum. Can an admin tell me if I can post the link as it is not my content, but the purpose of the video was created in order to answer this kind of  question. I am sure the creator would be fine with it.

[Bookworm]

At the very least I will pm you the link since you asked, but I feel more people would find this useful. I would also move this as it pertains to both mtf and ftm... well everybody really.


edit: I just the okay to post the link, so here it is

[Taka]

that's a pretty nice video.

[Natkat]

that the same way a homosexual mand identify as male and is attracted to other men makes him gay
so do a transexual mand who identify as male and being attracted to other men makes him gay.

said shortly, cisgenders can be gay, bisexual and whatever and so can trans* people be.

[LeviM]

When this topic has come up for me I just let the person know that gender and sexual orientation are two completely separate issues.  My gender or biological sex has nothing to do with who I am sexual attracted to. The only thing my gender determines in sexual orientation is the label used to describe it. A male attracted to only males is gay. A male only attracted to women is heterosexual. A male attracted to both men and women is bi sexual. A male attracted to all people regardless of their gender, biological sex or gender expression is pansexual.

There are some reasons people automatically come to the conclusion that trans men are heterosexual. Once upon a time trans man were denied access to medical transition if they were not sexually attracted to women. For a long time it was believed that trans men transitioned so they could live "normal" heterosexual lives. Pretty much this was the medical people misunderstanding what trans men and women's real issue was. They took it upon themselves to determine that our problem with our bodies being a direct response to being attracted to women. There's a whole lot more related to this topic but that is a simple run down.

As years have gone by many counselors came to their own opinion and many stopped enforcing the "must be attracted solely to women" part of the criteria for trans men. I know when I was on the phone scheduling my first appointment, the counselor told me straight out that if I was not attracted only to women, that I'd be wasting my time and money seeing her. That was over 12 years ago though and with the newest version of the DSM (diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders) coming out less than a week ago, it removed the specifier of sexual orientation. Thankfully even before this revision in the DSM 5, most counselors did not use a persons sexual orientation to disqualify them for medical transition near what they did 10 years ago, but unfortunately many professionals still do. Unfortunately many people still believe false outdated information concerning trans men and women. I have faith that with time and effort things will change for us.

[GentlemanRDP]

Well, I think it's as simple as telling someone that gender identity and sexuality have no connection to one another.
They're completely separate.
Just because you identify with one gender, it doesn't have any bearing to what gender you're attracted to.
At least, this is how I see things.

[Jack_M]

Agreeing with the rest here.  Sexuality has got nothing to do with gender.  Cis males and females can be straight, gay or bi without questioning that.  Being trans is a gender issue and has nothing to do with sexuality.  It CAN affect perceptions though or there can be confusion.

I can say that personally I'm now coming to terms with the fact that I actually didn't find guys sexually attractive when I thought I did; I wanted to BE them.  I wanted their hair cuts or the clothes they wore.  We don't fall for someone and then try to dress like them, right?  That's kinda crazy, but for a long time I was just confused and mistook attraction with jealousy.  So sometimes the process of transitioning or accepting being transgender can actually affect sexual interest.  However, at the end of the day, being trans isn't any different to being cis.  You fancy who YOU fancy.  A criteria of being trans isn't that you have a particular sexual orientation because to assume so would assume that all females and males are just hetero. 

IMO there's nothing to explain.  I find that when I come out to some people they very often ask stupid and irrelevant questions, like "Do you fancy girls then?" or questions about downstairs.  I find when people ask things like that it's just worth politely pointing out that neither of these define gender.  A man can be straight, gay or bi.  A guy can also be without genitalia through trauma.  Do any of those make them less of a man?  If anyone every responds "Yes" to that question, well I don't want to know them anyway.

[Natkat]

also many people explain it the way that:

your sexualety decribe who you go to bed with
your gender identety decribe who you go to bed as.

[Nygeel]

If any man can be gay and trans men are a type of man then any trans man could be gay. That kind of thought logic tends to work.

[D0LL]

I think that video explained it the best. I just shared the video to facebook to see how my friends react to it. I can see it being very controversial, though, as it is a difficult topic for a straight cis person to wrap their minds around.