Hi all,
For a person who is still trying to make up her mind about GRS, this has been a very interesting thread to read and before going any further, thanks to all for your contributions, especially those who are already over the hump.
For me, the experience of HRT and FFS have already eliminated any remaining doubts I might have had about transitioning. I now know for sure that I am far happier living as a woman. Based on this, if GRS could be done with a wave of a magic wand, it would already be done. Unfortunately, that is not the case so I am really thinking hard about the pros and cons.
The Pros for me are as follows:- Eliminating the last obstacle to being able to live comfortably as a woman under pretty well any circomstances including events like hospitalisation and any other situation requiring complete undress.
- The conviction that it will bring an even greater feeling of wholeness and inner integrity than I feel today.
- Facilitation of getting my gender changed officially. It's no longer a formal prerequisite but to get any of your official papers changed in France, you still have to go through a court procedure where the judge has complete power of decision. If you cannot convince them that you have made major physical changes, and in this area GRS carries more weight than anything else, many, if not most, will still still reject the request.
- Being able to wear any sort of clothes I like, already almost the case, but there are still some exceptions...
The Cons are more generic:- The significant risks associated with such surgery where there nearly always seem to be some complications, far more than with FFS.
- The amount of time required, apparently almost never less than two months and often a lot more. I'm not at all sure I can get this amount of time off from work.
- The impact it could have on my relationship with my wife. She has already digested huge changes but this last one would take us even further into uncharted territory.
- The cost but I think the costs that are being quoted here are probably on the high side. For information, here are some recent prices I am sure of:
Brassard: $19000 (including 14 days hospital + medicalized recovery house)
Supporn: $15600 (includes hospital stay but not pre and post-op accomodation)
Djordjevic $13000 (including hospital stay and pre & post-op accomodation)
Chettawut $10200 (includes hospital stay but not pre and post-op accomodation)
I personally know people who have done surgery with all of these surgeons and I'd find it difficult to chose between them based on their input. So, if I do go ahead it will be based on gut instinct more than anything else. On that basis, Djordjevic presently comes out on top for me.
One thing is for sure, to avoid regrets, it is best to think through as many of the potential consequences as possible before taking the plunge. Incidentally, I also know one person who has already tried to take her life twice since doing her GRS. It was not the GRS that did it directly but the impact the GRS had on her relationship with her wife. It finished it.
For what it's worth, in spite of the above considerations, my therapist told me this week that she would be OK to recommend me for GRS should I wish as she believes that I have taken things gradually enough to know what I am doing...
Warm regards to all you fellow travellers.
Donna