is this acceptance or a backhanded slap?

[kariann330]

So i was talking to my Dad last night around a bonfire and yup both of us were drunk off a home brew of mine that is too strong to sell as "beer" even tho it's made the same way (hygrometer put it at 25% abv) but any who, Dad looks at me and says "first i gotta say you have way better legs then i thought you would in a skirt because of how much walking you do, but no matter what, you were my first child, you will always be my favorite child, and no matter what you will always be my son even if you have breasts and a vagina"


Soooo uhhh is that just his way of accepting everything, or was that a backhanded compliment? Im still too drunk and confused to tell lol.

[Hideyoshi]

no matter what you will always be my son

My dad told me this, too.  It's really hard to see if they mean it the way we interpret it.  It can be interpreted as 'whatever you do, I will always see you as my son,' which is bad, but it can also be 'I'll always love you, no matter what you do'

I don't think they mean it offensively

[Beth Andrea]

I'd take it as a compliment, if he is otherwise respectful (using your girl name, she/her, etc).

[Cindy]

There are no meaningful comments between two drunk people!!!

[Jess42]

I would definately take it as acceptance. I don't know how old you are but your dad has seen you however many years as his son and old memories die hard. Just be as accepting of his still seeing you as his son with breasts and a vagina and allow him some room for mistakes and slip ups.

[Sammy]

It means, he will still drink Your booze with You .

[suzifrommd]

I would take it as acceptance Kariann. Anyone says you have nice legs, they see you as a woman.

[Joanna Dark]

At first glance, I would take it as a compliment. But I also think it would depend on other things he has said too. If he says "you will always be my son" a lot, he might mean he will never see you as a woman. But I think that is reading too much into things, which is something i do alot. Don't be me. Honestly, I think it his way of saying I accept you. I imagine it his hard for most fathers to accept their son as their daughter. I'm not sure about my own. I look exactly like my mom and my sister and the aunts and cousins on my mom's side. I have had no shortage of that fact being pointed out. Also, my mom treated me like a girl most of my life. I was prolly the only cis male in my graduating class in college that received a big bouget of roses. Every woman I saw got them though. I felt like such a girl. So in that way for my dad I don't think it is a stretch. Your dad seems to love you lots so you're very lucky and so, yes, it is a compliment!

[HM]

Personally, I wouldn't take anything serious when excessive amounts
of alcohol are involved.

Your comment about still being drunk and confused bring back memories.
I'm thankful I gave the stuff up years ago. Life dosn't get any easier
without it but it's sure great to wake up in the morning feeling good instead
of feeling like I was hit by a bus!

I'll get off my soap box now and return you to your regularly scheduled
programing.

[PepperedIssy]

There are no meaningful comments between two drunk people!!!

What she said!  However that's not something you likely want to hear, it's probably just drunken family being drunken family! I'll admit, that'd probably make me explode, but I don't think it was said in bad spirit! Also you were both drunk, I think that has to be stressed more than anything.

[Jamie D]

25% alcohol by volume?  Holy crap.  That's 50-proof.

[kariann330]

25% alcohol by volume?  Holy crap.  That's 50-proof.

Slow brew and triple hop the brew. It ends up being darker the Genius and super concentrated.

[Jamie D]

Kariann's "Kick Your Ass" homebrew

[kariann330]

Just about. It has a really different taste because of how much hops goes into it but when finished its the strongest Chocolate Stout you will enjoy

[Ltl89]

I think it's his way of saying I'll always love you.  If it's still early on, I would take it as acceptance.  I bet that's his way of showing you his support even if it could be taken another way. 

I do find it curious that he said you were his favorite child.  My parents would never choose me over my sisters or vice versa.  Either way, it seems to work in your favor so run with it.   

[Nero]

Sounds like acceptance to me. Sounds like his heart was in the right place even if the delivery was a little clumsy. I wouldn't think it had any double meaning. And, he was drunk so...

[kariann330]

I do find it curious that he said you were his favorite child.  My parents would never choose me over my sisters or vice versa.  Either way, it seems to work in your favor so run with it.

Eh what can i say my family puts the "fun" in dysfunctional. My mother always got along better with my little brother, i was a daddy's girl and have a lot more in common with my dad then anyone else in my family.

[Lorri Kat]

   It's acceptance....   You were the first child, for some that does not hold as much merit then any other child, to others it is a better feeling and life experience then if all holidays could be rolled up into one.   For them the feelings of love, attachment and pride are utterly euphoric, wich some 'guys' would never admit to another 'guy', beyond anything one even thought was possible to  feel towards another person.(raises her hand.. I know from my first child)   Your Father will always, I'm guessing, remember that day and nothing will ever take away what I believe he felt, nor should it.  That is not a bad thing. Hopped up  high-test beer tends loosen tongues.. '' A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts".  He truly loves you and said as much along with tacit acknowledgement, slightly cryptic in nature perhaps, still none the less of his acceptance and support. That is far more then many will ever hear or know.   

Giggles....    Nice Legs!!   

[smile_jma]

My dad says that to me, not drunk. I just have to give him time. Can't MAKE him say what he doesn't want to/feels uncomfortable saying/weird for him to say, etc. He has to come around on his own terms.  ...Just as long as he doesn't say it in public with people around. That would just be awkward for everyone.