Sometimes i felt like the only anchor i had to being a girl was my hobby in the crocheting/knitting/cute crap hobbys i had.
i like cute stuff, what can i say. i would never wear something super frilly or girly but making things like hats and stuff for my friends is awesome. i'd take my crocheting into classes and other places. I draw things like this:
🔗 [Link: media.photobucket.com/user/nekokineko/media/slideshowpic7.jpg.html/] (actually i will draw this stuff but my style has drifted to more:
http://fav.me/d5ybhb4 🔗)
and i have quite a story about my hobby and my gener identity. very recently i came across a video game, it's called persona 4. if you have an interest in vide games, this game is amazing. it tackles so many issues. including transgender and homosexuality. but not in such a way where it's in your face or portrayed a disgusting or anything, just as a part of the characters self that they come to terms with...well anyway, what i was getting at was there was one character n particular that shattered my image of my hobby being restricted to my girly nature.
a thug of a character named kanji tatsumi:
http://fav.me/d6bslvt 🔗 is one of the people you encounter in the game. he walks around like the biggest tough guy in the game. you soon find out he knits as a hobby in secret. (he doesn't want to be ridiculed by others for his 'girly hobby') as the game progresses he get's feelings for an FTM named naoto. anyway, i won't go too into details about him but basically he just wants to be able to make his cute stuff and not be seen as weak or girly, which really changed how i saw my hobby. as it was, just a hobby, i didn't hve to be a girl to do it. and thus more questioning of my gender came after and whatnot. i shouldn't let a game affect me so deeply OTL. but if you've ever played it you know what it does to you... persona man, deep stuff...
anyway rant aside, how many FTMs out there knit and or crochet or sew? do you feel demasculated by your hobby? or is it just something you do and don't think anything about wether or not it makes you feel womanly or manly or whathaveyou.