Doctors appointment this morning

[Tatyana]

I'm a little anxious about seeing a doc.  She's  going to ask me how can I help you and I don't know where to start. How do I tell her I have male genitals.  This is going to be awkward as he'll.  what if she's like real conservative and doesn't want to deal with someone like me? I'm seriously thinking canceling but I need to get go through with this.  I've put it off too long.

[Jenny07]

Be brave Tatyana.

I did this about 3 weeks ago. very nerve wreaking so I know how you feel.
I went with, I have gender issues and need to talk to some one about this. I hate the trans word so much.
Go from there.

Be yourself and don't worry about shedding a few tears as it is so hard to talk about.

That was 3 weeks ago, now I have E! That's how well it went and yes I did think about running away from the appointment, I event told the doctor this. She was very supportive and was wonderful. She knew exactly what to do as the rest is history.

Be true to yourself and shortly it will be done with so you can move forward to being yourself.

All the best, Jen

[Ltl89]

Tatyana,

What sort of appointment is this?  Are you going for your gender issues or is it something unrelated.  If it's unrelated, don't worry about telling them about your genitals.  It likely won't come up. If it is related to your gender, are you going in order to start the transition process?  Sorry I just want to understand so I don't say the wrong thing.

[Tatyana]

Tatyana,

What sort of appointment is this?  Are you going for your gender issues or is it something unrelated.  If it's unrelated, don't worry about telling them about your genitals.  It likely won't come up. If it is related to your gender, are you going in order to start the transition process?  Sorry I just want to understand so I don't say the wrong thing.

Yes it's gender related.  I have to go through my PC doc to see a specialist. I want to find out if I need estrogen to maintain my female appearance.

[Ltl89]

Okay, 

Sucks that you have to get a referral.  In any event, do you know this doctor well?  Most people have a relationship with their doctor, so that's why I ask.  If so, it may be a little challenging, but at least they will know who you are and what sort of person you are.

As for what to say, just be honest about how you feel.  Tell them you want to see a therapist for these issues and find a sense of peace within yourself.  No doctor would really begrudge a patient looking to go to therapy (at least, no good doctor).  I'm assuming it's for a therapist and not for an endo or something else, correct?

[kathyk]

Yeah, referals are a pain in the ass.  But when you go in just tell her everything right up front.  You'll hear those words come out of your mouth and suddenly there's a big relief from all the things that bothered you or held you back.  Most female doctors are more emotionally understanding and will listen a little closer to your situations, so I wouldn't worry till she says something very negative (not likely).  And even if she did fight you on the referal thing she should give you some option.  And if not don't just give up, and keep pushing her for help.

I have a long drive today, and wondering about what your appointment results are will give me something to think about. ...  Instead of my own problems. 

Keep the positive stuff going hun.     

[Jessica Merriman]

Tatyana, I am sure this is just one of those things we build up that turn out OK. I am sure she is a true professional and all will go well. By the way you are so beautiful I am a little jealous. I wish I could have started transition a long time ago. We are all in your corner and wishing you the best. Have a great day!

[cdjeannie]

Tatyana, you are a beautiful woman and I'm sure your doctor will be accepting and helpful. That's what doctors are trained to do. I'm sure you aren't the first to talk about these issues with them and surely won't be the last.

I know from some of your other posts that you are excited about this so please don't cancel. Take a few deep breaths and you'll be fine.

Hugs and kisses, Jeannie

[Jamie D]

I'm a little anxious about seeing a doc.  She's  going to ask me how can I help you and I don't know where to start. How do I tell her I have male genitals.  This is going to be awkward as he'll.  what if she's like real conservative and doesn't want to deal with someone like me? I'm seriously thinking canceling but I need to get go through with this.  I've put it off too long.

She's a doctor.  Be honest.  If she has a patient roster of several hundred, then she probable has other transgendered persons she treats.

Doctors usually end up in the business because they are caring people.  Be honest and be direct.  I am sure it will go fine.

[Robin Mack]

She's a doctor.  Be honest.  If she has a patient roster of several hundred, then she probable has other transgendered persons she treats.

Doctors usually end up in the business because they are caring people.  Be honest and be direct.  I am sure it will go fine.

This.  The biggest limitation is often our fear of rejection.  I have gotten more support and help than I ever would have dreamed simply because (for most of us) we've lived our lives denying ourselves, thinking there is something wrong with us and wanting desperately to fit in.  It's not you, it's your *parts* that don't fit in with the world.  Medical professionals are trained and licensed to "First, do no harm".  They will not hurt you by rejecting you or ridiculing you or blabbing to their friends.  Even if they wanted to, even if they were ultra conservative abortion-clinic picketing GLBT hating crazies (and generally the degree of education required to be a doctor weeds *those* out, amazing how people get more liberal the broader their mind gets) they would be risking their entire profession to do it.  If they were to violate their code of ethics, they would likely lose their license to practice medicine.

So, for one thing, you will be treated as a human being (if for no other reason than self-preservation).  For another you are a paying client, and no one likes to turn down money.  Those are all cold, hard facts, absent of any sentimentality and focused on selfish reasons, and I'm putting them out there to give you a logical case to put your mind at ease.

Now for the less logical- Jamie is absolutely right.  Doctors get into the business to help people.  There are other ways to make a lot of money (and most GP's don't make much at all, to tell the truth, after insurance and paying their staff).  You are suffering from a treatable, internationally recognized medical condition.  Generally the only reason you will be referred is because another doctor can do a better job of treating you.

I know it's scary... but it is so incredibly important that you be brave and take this step.  Having a competent medical team at your back is the best way to deal with a complicated medical and psychological challenge.  You're in for a lot of changes, and you're taking the right step.

*hug*

[KabitTarah]

I came out to my current GP... the appointment was about a week before my 1st therapy session... so that's how far along I was (not that I'm much further now, but I know more and am slowly changing my appearance).

He was very open about it, and curious about what it meant. He hadn't had anyone who was and hadn't heard about it since they discussed it in med school. I told him as much as I knew at the time... and my next appointment I'll be asking for Spiro. I have a letter in my pocket for him explaining what I want, why, and how trans* HRT schedules work. I also discuss the therapist's letter and when it's needed.

I also put words in there that if he's not comfortable administering and monitoring my hormones that I can get an appointment with a trans-friendly GP in February. I think that's important - it gives him an out without me forcing the issue on him. I think he'll be ok with it, but I don't want him to hesitate when he should question or act on something.

[Jerri]

I have been reading the posts here and am so greatful to have so many girls that have been through this process, to help those of who have yet to make these steps. I also am seeing my GP about my gender issues for the first time on wednesday, I want to have medical support to balance my hormones,  and start the documentation to support srs. I have been in counciling for most of the year and have been black marketing and unsupervised my transformation and hrt since early in july of this year, So far he our gp has been very helpful for my wife who has seen him for her stability when I came at home, work is being some what supportive so I decided to move forward with this step also. I am more looking forward to the visit than thinking of backing out but that thought is sure there. I hope you can find the strength in your self to go forward with this step. For me each time I cross one these barriors I get a bit stronger and seem to move forward with more conviction. stay the course love, Jerri

[Tatyana]

Thanks everyone for all the great support and compliments.  I posted about my doctor visit in hormone replacement.  I don't know if that's the right forum or not but I detailed what I found out so far.

[izzy]

If  the doctor is a ama member she shouldn't reject you. Tell her what you want done and would either check it herself or likely refer you to endo.