The majority of employers do not have self-insured plans. Unfortunately most large employers, including my own, do. So if you don't want to change employers, and can't persuade your employer to do the right thing, there are a few other options that may be viable for you:
1) If you have a 401k account, find out if your employer's 401k plan allows loans. Mine does, and I can borrow up to half of the the vested value from myself at 2% annual interest rate. For SRS, if all ducks are in a row it can even be documented that it was for a medically necessary expense and so exempt from IRS policies if I change employers before I have paid the loan back over 5 years. If not, the penalty is 10%, which is less than the interest rate for a medical loan that I would qualify for.
2) If you are intellectually oriented, many universities now have student health plans (required for part time or greater students) which cover SRS. Go back to school part time and get your surgery covered that way. The degree will help your career and the surgery will help your happiness.