Dilate Forever?

[mrs izzy]

Specifics, if you want them:  She is having me dilate daily in the shower - just in as far as it will go and then remove it.  After the shower I put a little estrogen cream on the sore spots at the narrow place where the vagina goes through the pubic bone.  (I'm going to stop doing that now and see how it goes.)  I insert a prescribed amount of the estrogen cream deep into the vagina the night before a regular dilation (the 15-minute kind).

Very helpful to me was that she told me that my needs are not unusual.  She says that many (cis-)women my age who are not having regular penetrative sex need to dilate regularly if they want to maintain the ability for it.

(It took me a while to get comfortable dilating standing in the shower.  I dropped back a size for that until I had the technique figured out.  I use the regular dilator now.)

I hope this helps.
- Kate

Tyvm.
My GP who also does my gyno looks has added estrogen cream to my after care. So it is good to see that was something you also are using.
She said to put it deep inside also. I also have a area just at the PC that has not been a happy camper and will try adding a little there also.

Thanks for the post.

Isabell

[anjaq]

Estriol cream is what i get now and it is doing wonders. It is all softer and on good days I do not even have to use lubrication gel anymore...

[anjaq]

Yasmine - the cream should be absorbed within a day by the mucous skin insider the vagina. Sone of it seems to be pushed out though. If it is Estriol cream and not Estradiol cream, it should increase softness and stretchability of the vagina as well as promote the formation of mucous. However if you douche inside regularly, it cannot really do much, as part of its action is to help promote a healthy vaginal flora. For that, vaginal microbes that are sold as tablets for insertion into the vagina are useful. If there is a good community in there, it promotes a healthy state with musous and softness. regular douching inside is then kind of unneeded and even destructive to that.

[anjaq]

Ok, I am not sure - probably its a matter of personal hygiene desires to douche that often - I guess some women do it some don't, but I guess what you add there is some sort of probiotic? In that case it should be able to still do something but there is that little discrepancy there - I get that one wants to feel clean and hygienic all over, including the insides, but we also don't wash out stomach or intestines regularly because those parts are supposed to build up some bacterial fauna who is living on things that pass by - The estriol cream I use has also some parts (I think it was lactose?) that the symbiotic bacteria in the vagina can "eat". It takes time but once the mucous skin inside develops, I think a lot is working out well. But you can use a lot less of the cream than is written in the package. Like 1/4 or so (and of course apply it after you had intercourse or did douching, so it can have the most time to act). It should help promoting the development of a wet climate inside and also regulate pH so that the symbionts can live there happily...

[Ms Bev]

Dilating is my least favorite thing in the world.  After about 14 months, I find it necessary to dilate every other day, and if I skip, it takes a longer time to get the blue one in place. Depth is still good, but width has gone down. I will never have sex with a man, so early on, I dropped the orange dilator out of my regimen.  I mean, why bother? Now, I've skipped too many days, and I'm down to purple and blue.  I guess I might be able to work up to the green.  Truth is, Dr McGinn did such a nice job, I am always totally self-lubricating, and my clitoris is easy for my partner to find under the hood.  But I had a problem healing totally, and now am the granulation tissue queen.  The big problem, is maintaining width.  I wish I could get to a once-a-week schedule, but I don't ever see that happening.

[anjaq]

I am trying something new now. I stiull use the green and orange dilators for a while (right now still over an hour to get to a state where it is not uncomfly too much anymore). I think I will try to use them now mostly in a more dynamic way and to try to gain some depth. Afterwards I will put in a soft silicone placeholder for some hours or overnight. I hope this will help to make the dilation easier next time. I also got a size plus of the orange one in case this is possible at some time. It still is at the beginning rather hard to use the green, so I hope I get to the state where green is simple, that should be ok then.

[anjaq]

Yasmine - I did not get a bigger dilator no, but I got a dildo that is a bit bigger and has a similar shape. So maybe it will help. And yes - I use dildos as a placeholder, basically I found one that is rather the same diameter all its length, that has some "ripples" that help to keep it in place and that is about the size between the green and orange soul source dilators (I also got one size larger but that is not in use yet) and just leave it in after dilation with the soul source dilators. I cannot say if it helps yet.

dynamic dilation, if I get that right is about widening the deeper part more?

[anjaq]

About leaving the dildo in after dilation and while you sleep. I was told that that's dangerous, but perhaps it's only dangerous the first months after surgery.

What is the danger?

What I heard was that for some the lubrication they use dries out and then it can get stuck. I did not have that issue yet - either the insideskin is not sucking up the lube that fast or it is because I do have considerable muscous development there so that lubrication is not much of an issue in the deeper parts.

Yes. Just imagine what happens when you rotate the dilator widely. The dilator rotates the widest where it's the deepest in the vagina.

Ok, this I need. Thanks.

[Boca.Lisa]

I was told minimum of 1x weekly BUT and here's the kicker, 3x if i noticed any loss of depth or any pain. 3x it is!

[mandonlym]

Eep, you're all making me feel like a bad transsexual. I'm 12 years post-op and I haven't dilated since I first had sex after surgery, even through periods when I wasn't sexually active (about two years). When I'm not having intercourse, all I do is put two fingers in my vagina while I'm showering and stretch them as wide as I can. I so far haven't noticed any difference since the first time I had sex and haven't had any problems having intercourse. I was 26 when I got my operation.

[anjaq]

I gues sit depends on luck and if these 2 years were the only break in having regular sex, thats not too bad. Having a BF definitely saves you a lot of dilation work. Was this a PI or different technique?

[mandonlym]

This is with Dr. Suporn, which as I understand is not PI. Clearly I am not super well-informed and should do more homework given it's a vital part of my body...

[mrs izzy]

I think it all comes down to our own feelings of how things are down there.

By the 1 year mark i think everyone should know if they will need more or less going forward.

Add in having intercourse will be a added bonus.

Does it really matter if it is 1x a week, every other week or every other day. Each is there own and must keep there own comfort level if the wish to use it for something other then just dilations.

Isabell

[anjaq]

Ah yes - wir Dr Suporn I think you can take long breaks afterwards and its not an issue. Tradeoff seems to be: Suporn means to dilate a whole lot during the healing phase but afterwards you can really relax, with PI you will have more time in the beginning but need to do a lot of work forever. At least thats my impression now. I heard for some even after years it is needed to dilate right before intercourse for a moment to get things in shape - that sounds lot like a lot of fun but it seems true at least in some cases. I at least would not feel good about just being spontaneous now - it would be hurting if it would be possible at all... but then i know I still need to do some extra work to get back in shape, albeit I believe I am reaching sort of a stagnant point there.

As I understand it - Suporn and others use that meshed skin which will cause some issues healing initially but once healted it is relatively stable and cannot contract in a short time, only after long breaks. With PI the skin is elastic and basically shrinks down immediately after dilation but can be stretched again the next time, so maintenance is to keep the skin used to be stretched frequently.

I still wonder though what the issue is supposed to be about not keeping a dildo or stent or whatever in place for some hours...?

[mandonlym]

Yeah I found the whole process mysterious, mainly the whole thing that intercourse is supposed to work as a substitute but not vibrators. I feel like that just doesn't make logical sense. I hate the idea that transition needs to be medicalized for the rest of one's life... especially that we need to treat our most erotic body part as a medical site forever and ever and ever.

Of course I would have done something different if I felt something but I haven't so I use my improvised method along with my vibrator. So far, things have been fine.

[Jenna Marie]

I don't mind dilating 15 minutes a week forever, honestly - even the 15 min/twice a week now is OK.

Also, I think the main issue with leaving it in overnight is infection. Obviously, in the beginning that's a serious concern; once it's long-healed, though, I'd guess it's the same risks as any other vagina with a longer-term resident (=yeast infection, minor skin tears, tiny chance of toxic shock). Basically, at that point, I'd assume that the warnings for tampons applied to overnight dildos, since they occupy the vagina for about the same length of time and in fact anything plastic may be less risky than a tampon.

Personally, though, I don't want to be doing anything overnight! Since I'm doing fine on the standard regimen, I'm happy to sleep in peace.

[anjaq]

mandonlym, I think intercourse is fine - also vibrators are fine - I use vibrators for most of the tima dn it worked well up until I somehow lost interest in that and did not switch to regarding it again as a medical issue...

I don't mind dilating 15 minutes a week forever, honestly - even the 15 min/twice a week now is OK.
Personally, though, I don't want to be doing anything overnight! Since I'm doing fine on the standard regimen, I'm happy to sleep in peace.

Well Yeast infections - if I clean that thing well it should be fine. I also apply some estriol cream to help the good bacteria to stay alive.
2x15 min a week woul dbe ok but sinde at the present it is like 2 hours a day for me, I really would like to cut it a bit. Plus - who said that I cannot sleep VERY MUCH in peace that way - seriously it is not a bad feeling at all for me. Although as of now, I will wake up after 3-4 hours and feel it is a bit tight and then take it out and continue sleeping...

[Jenna Marie]

Actually, yeast infections are counterintuitive - a vagina *should* have some yeast living in it. That's normal, and healthy.  It's when you kill off enough of the local bacteria that keep the yeast in check (which is why some antibiotics can cause yeast infections) that the yeast exceed normal levels and become a problem. So, basically, you also don't want to be *over*sterilizing.

(All these instructions are, of course, for long-term post-ops. In the early days, follow the surgeon's instructions and err on the side of being scrupulously sanitized.)

2 hours daily really is too much, yeah. And I said *I* couldn't sleep in peace - I'm a very light sleeper as it is. I envy y'all who can sleep through things like that!

[anjaq]

Actually i like the feeling of sleeping "with it" as long as it is really a soft one. What the bleep is a "f...ing machine".

[Maris]

Dilating for life,

I kind of just looked at it as if I was just like as Woman who suffers from Vaginismus,

It is just part of life, does not make me feel any less of a Woman at all